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Old 12-03-2008, 11:05 AM
 
14 posts, read 48,230 times
Reputation: 14

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Hi,
We recently moved to Alexandria, VA and my wife would be at home and we don't have kids.. She feels very boring all the day.. I am wondering if there is anything that she can do to keep her busy..

Thanks for you suggestions...
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Old 12-03-2008, 11:38 AM
 
1,230 posts, read 4,226,330 times
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1) Tour the museums, art galleries, etc.
2) Join a book club (she can find some in her community or through the public library)
3) Take a class (check out classes through the local community colleges, USDA graduate school, parks and recreation department, etc.)
4) Do volunteer work
5) Learn a new hobby (I know many women enjoy scrapbooking)
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Old 12-03-2008, 12:11 PM
 
Location: Richmond, VA
2,240 posts, read 7,029,034 times
Reputation: 841
Does she want a job?
I would do some volunteer work. I know what it is like to feel useless. (I hate sitting at home and I AM a stay at home mom...I got a pt job just so I feel like I am doing SOMETHING)
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Old 12-03-2008, 12:25 PM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
708 posts, read 1,361,111 times
Reputation: 724
Check out:

VolunteerMatch - Where Volunteering Begins

You can type in your zip code, choose an area, and volunteer for just about anything.

By the way, I feel for your wife. I really do. When we moved from Virginia to Charlotte, NC. I decided I would take a 6-12 month "hiatus" or "mini-retirement" of sorts before I started looking for a job. We also don't have kids.

We moved down in August. By October I was getting antsy. By December I was flat out nuts. I started looking for jobs in December and landed one in January and I was never happier to go back to work. I am just not good with nothing to do.

Sadly, that experience ruined one of my fantasies: That my life would be so great if I just didn't have a stupid job. I expect I will never fully "retire" for mental health reasons alone.

Edited to add:
Looking back on the experience, I have often thought that the source of my problem was that I wasn't organized with a daily schedule. I haven't taken any large chunk of time off since then to test the theory (thank goodness).

If I had to do that time over again I would volunteer, set a schedule for errands and house chores (Tuesdays do laundry, Thursdays go grocery shopping, etc.) I would probably do organized volunteering through Volunteer Match, maybe go to a MeetUp group, etc.
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Old 12-03-2008, 12:40 PM
 
Location: Orlando
259 posts, read 532,794 times
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First of all I think you are wonderful for being concerned and posting here. I am a housewife and just moved here in September. I don't have any childeren. I am so miserable. I have always worked and I am looking for work, and its driving me crazy that I can't find a job because my industry is pretty much non-existant here. I tried going to a museum, but it felt weird walking about by myself. People looked at me strange. I think I am going to check out that volunteering link above. Funny, I've actually tried to volunteer but nobody calls me. Sorry to make this about me... but I just wanted to say do your best to include her in social activities with people you meet, and don't ignore her when you get home! Other than that she'll probably have to figure out her own fun. I'd take classes if I could, but for US thats a financial constraint we can't handle w/ out me working. Either you have don't have time or money....at least in my world
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Old 12-03-2008, 12:53 PM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
708 posts, read 1,361,111 times
Reputation: 724
Oh delg23 I am so sorry to hear about your frustrations. I know exactly how you feel, I've been there.

I have gone to the museums in DC alone, right after I moved up there before I knew anyone. I didn't feel weird, but I can see where you might. (I, for instance, feel strangely uncomfortable eating out alone.)

Maybe you could find people who share a common interest with you on MeetUp and go to the museums with them?
Use the Internet to get off the Internet! - Meetup.com

I just think it's a horrible shame to not enjoy the wonderful museums DC has to offer. I miss them terribly since we moved to Charlotte!

Alternatively, maybe you could find a side job that is totally not at all what your "career" or "industry" is. Something that you've always wanted to do. Maybe working as a vet tech for a veterinarian if you love animals, or a photographer's assistant if you're a photographer. Something where you'd just sort of "apprentice" for a career you didn't choose when you started out. Not full time, but part time where you could still look for your "career" job...

OP - these are ideas that might help your wife too. I feel for the women who find themselves at home alone during the day. While I don't want to have children myself, I was always envious of the immediate social network that mothers have, particularly with young kids. I remember sitting at home in my office and watching the mommies all walk their kids in strollers in my new neighborhood. I felt so lonely and isolated, and it just didn't feel right to try and wedge myself into their social circle. (Who's the crazy lady with no kid? What's wrong with her? That's creepy!)
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Old 12-03-2008, 01:31 PM
 
14 posts, read 48,230 times
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Thanks a lot for your suggestions...she is not yet eligible to do the Job in USA. I think volunteering would keep her busy...any other ideas?
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Old 12-03-2008, 05:34 PM
 
Location: Alexandria, VA
5,606 posts, read 9,525,629 times
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I'm overwhelmed with work right now - can she come clean and cook our dinners? LOL - Just kidding.

What does she enjoy? Does she speak English or another language? I agree being childless (as we are) makes it kind of hard to get any kind of social groups together.

Does she get online? Maybe if she posted here and other places she'd find a group(s) that get together for coffee, walks, book clubs, whatever.

It would be nice maybe to have a sticky on the NoVa forum for such things: I am pretty social for instance and interested in meeting others for drinks, dinner, hanging out, etc. For instance, we like to hang out, play board games, have a couple beers and gab.
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Old 12-04-2008, 07:31 AM
 
Location: Home is where the heart is
15,400 posts, read 18,084,474 times
Reputation: 18806
Toastmasters is very big in NOVA, I think there are a dozen or so clubs in Alexandria. You can find a list online. It's a good way to network and make friends.

If she likes to sing or act there are a number of choirs and theater groups. That's also a good way to make friends.

If she doesn't like walking thrugh a museum alone as a tourist, how about volunteering for a museum? If she has a job, it might not feel so wierd, and volunteers tend to find the exhibits much more interesting becuase they learn inside stories about things. I volunteered for the Reston Museum a few years ago and it was a lot of fun.

There are plenty of outdoor groups. Hiking clubs, running clubs, and (my favorite) kayaking groups, especially after the weather warms up. The Fairfax County Park System has all sorts of groups and activities.

Bible/religious studies are also popular here
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Old 12-05-2008, 11:09 AM
 
148 posts, read 422,360 times
Reputation: 66
Volunteer at Fairfax County Rec. Center and get a free Gym membership, and of course enjoy other things that DC has to offer.
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