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Old 10-02-2009, 05:57 AM
 
10,596 posts, read 12,090,790 times
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NOVA is not a good indicator for the rest of the country. Sure, many of the SAHMs in the NOVA area have "opted out" but they are the minority for the rest of the country and the census reflects that.
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Old 10-02-2009, 10:46 AM
 
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A lot of the SAHMs have husbands that make so much money they dont have to work - even though they are "highly educated" -
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Old 10-02-2009, 07:28 PM
 
Location: Vienna
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I guess it depends on the definition of "highly educated"- most Nova (and Vienna moms) appear to have bachelors. As for experience to make that bachelors command a decent salary- that is a different story for what I have encountered (my own personal experience- flame away but everyone has their own- and there are also exceptions- but exceptions do not make a norm). I found most had bachelors and were pretty lower level (not even necessarily by youth- meaning by 30s were making not this huge amount of money). The stay at home versus not work was obviously not an overwhelmingly compelling reason. As for motivation- for what I saw- most of these moms who would not miss out that much on working vs staying in the workforce actually didn't want to work anyway. They were pretty junior and weren't "opting out" of that much in a sense. They just didn't want to work in a professional environment. As for those who defend how mothering is a job- I also saw moms- there are those who shuffle the kids from grandmas/preschools etc. and basically have a LOT of free time off.

So flame away- I;ve done it all- stay at home, work from home p/t and now have a great f/t job close by that is super family friendly and i am in a senior enough position to take time to go my kid's preschool activities etc. Dh has a decent job that if the economy hits hard can propel us into his not being employed again.
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Old 10-02-2009, 11:29 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Fairfax Mom View Post
A lot of the SAHMs have husbands that make so much money they dont have to work - even though they are "highly educated" -
BINGO!!! I know 5 SAHM's who are attorneys. They don't have to work, their husbands make buckets of money. Another friend has an MBA and another a PhD. They're all at home, for now. ALL of the SAHMs I know have graduated from college and the majority have graduate degrees.
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Old 10-03-2009, 07:10 AM
 
Location: Brambleton, VA
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I have a Master's and I'm a SAHM. My husband makes twice what I was making when I was working. If our salaries were switched, then he would be the one staying home. We live comfortably on his salary; we both feel it is more important for one of us to stay home with our babies than to have the extra income. I would return to work if our circumstances were to change - I'm just incredibly lucky that I don't have to right now.
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Old 10-03-2009, 08:27 AM
 
280 posts, read 911,342 times
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Originally Posted by Yankeesfan View Post

Yes, most SAHMs do not have graduate or professional degrees and didn't give up elite careers, because most women (most people, actually) do not have graduate or professional degrees or elite careers. (If everyone did then by definition they wouldn't be "elite.")
Good point. The number of women for whom staying at home would be opting out is the minority.

Those elite are also probably more tempted to work than others--more money, prestige, interesting work, to balance the costs of child care and time missed.
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Old 10-03-2009, 08:44 AM
 
Location: Falls Church, VA
722 posts, read 1,752,211 times
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Originally Posted by novahousehunter View Post
Good point. The number of women for whom staying at home would be opting out is the minority.

Those elite are also probably more tempted to work than others--more money, prestige, interesting work, to balance the costs of child care and time missed.
Yes, exactly. I was pulling in $40K as essentially someone's secretary when I got pregnant with my first. Staying at home seemed to make sense, if that was what I was giving up. If I was pulling in three times that much doing something interesting and meaningful, my decision would have been different.

All of the SAHMs I've met in NoVa do have at least a Bachelor's degree. But NoVa has more college graduates than most places; having a Bachelor's here really doesn't mean very much. But across the U.S., still only something like 26% of adults over 25 have a Bachelor's. If you're looking at the nation as a whole, I'm pretty well-educated, with a Bachelor's from UMD. If you're looking at the DC area, though, I'm hardly good enough to wait tables
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Old 10-03-2009, 08:59 AM
 
715 posts, read 1,866,291 times
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Originally Posted by athousandlogins View Post
Yes, exactly. I was pulling in $40K as essentially someone's secretary when I got pregnant with my first. Staying at home seemed to make sense, if that was what I was giving up. If I was pulling in three times that much doing something interesting and meaningful, my decision would have been different.

All of the SAHMs I've met in NoVa do have at least a Bachelor's degree. But NoVa has more college graduates than most places; having a Bachelor's here really doesn't mean very much. But across the U.S., still only something like 26% of adults over 25 have a Bachelor's. If you're looking at the nation as a whole, I'm pretty well-educated, with a Bachelor's from UMD. If you're looking at the DC area, though, I'm hardly good enough to wait tables
You have a totally valid example...a SAHM b/c of her baby where if you worked, most of your income would be going to child care.

The question is for SAHM who do have kids in full day school and are at home just to stay home. It doesn't matter how much the husband is making, there's always more to be made.

It must still be boring to stay at home when it's not necessary, and for the record, not all attorneys have glamor jobs in the big firms working 100+ hours/week, and not all people with MBA's can get a job.
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Old 10-03-2009, 08:59 AM
 
Location: Polish Hill, Pittsburgh, PA
30,102 posts, read 67,199,392 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by athousandlogins View Post
Yes, exactly. I was pulling in $40K as essentially someone's secretary when I got pregnant with my first. Staying at home seemed to make sense, if that was what I was giving up. If I was pulling in three times that much doing something interesting and meaningful, my decision would have been different.

All of the SAHMs I've met in NoVa do have at least a Bachelor's degree. But NoVa has more college graduates than most places; having a Bachelor's here really doesn't mean very much. But across the U.S., still only something like 26% of adults over 25 have a Bachelor's. If you're looking at the nation as a whole, I'm pretty well-educated, with a Bachelor's from UMD. If you're looking at the DC area, though, I'm hardly good enough to wait tables
I believe 70% of the adults over age 25 in Reston possess at least a Bachelor's Degree, and I believe this percentage, while amazing, might be even higher in some other more affluent locations.
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Old 10-03-2009, 09:00 AM
 
715 posts, read 1,866,291 times
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Originally Posted by Denton56 View Post
BINGO!!! I know 5 SAHM's who are attorneys. They don't have to work, their husbands make buckets of money. Another friend has an MBA and another a PhD. They're all at home, for now. ALL of the SAHMs I know have graduated from college and the majority have graduate degrees.
Seems like the degree of most value in these examples is the Mrs. degree.
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