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Old 03-19-2010, 02:49 PM
 
Location: Arlington, VA and Washington, DC
23,578 posts, read 33,312,074 times
Reputation: 32144

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Quote:
Originally Posted by RestonRunner86 View Post
Thank you. Today I took a therapeutic drive through NoVA's "Hunt Country" (Middleburg Area) for the first time. I then veered up a side street off of Route 50 through Millwood and Boyce and then took U.S. 340 up to Berryville where I caught 7 back down to Reston. Seeing the trees so near to getting their buds made me realize how close I came to never getting to see a sight like the first Spring blooms ever again.



Thanks! My therapist pretty much told me to stop letting people walk all over me, and that's exactly the new persona I've adopted. I may have never pulled back from going toe-to-toe with people on this forum, but in real life I hated to have an enemy and always went to the greatest extent possible to make someone laugh and to turn a frown upside-down! She has taught me to be more selective about whom I keep company with so that I never again have to endure the vile things that some "friends" did to me back in January.



Thanks!



Thanks, Caladium. I know this is for "real" this time though. I'm genuinely happy. As I stated above today I took a therapeutic drive through Hunt Country. Tomorrow morning I'm doing a 5K run in Brambleton, potentially followed by reconnecting with a friend and taking him out to explore the District. Sunday I'm going to donate blood, go to church, and then go to a new members' "meet and greet" sort of affair afterwards at the home of a fellow congregant. Then Sunday night is my awesome television line-up---The Simpsons, Cleveland Show, Desperate Housewives, and Brothers & Sisters!

I don't expect anyone to rush to rally to my side. I know trust and respect need to be earned. I just hope people don't automatically assume I'm going to be some big jerk and not even give me a chance.



Now that the weather is improving, Margery, I've pledged to spend less time indoors in general. Yesterday evening I enjoyed a wonderful hike along the Difficult Run Trail in Great Falls. Today I took that country drive. Tomorrow I am doing a 5K run followed by exploring the District. Sunday will be spent connecting with people from my church. I already have a volunteer opportunity lined up for next weekend. Life is good.



Thank you!
RR, if we lived close to each other I'd give you a big hug right now. Hopefully this new juice about yourself lasts.

 
Old 03-19-2010, 02:55 PM
 
Location: Polish Hill, Pittsburgh, PA
30,107 posts, read 67,215,654 times
Reputation: 15758
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alanboy395 View Post
I give you a lot of credit for coming back. I'm glad that you've dedicated yourself in being a better person who is stronger.
Thanks, Alan. You know from Facebook that my life had been an extreme roller coaster ride over the past two months in particular, and I appreciate that you didn't adopt the role several of my other friends adopted by thinking "he's nuts" and ditching me. It just goes to show you how some people will only want to be around you when it's "convenient" for them. When you're making someone feel good and when you're fun to be around people will always love you; however, as soon as something goes awry that's when you find out who is loyal and who's a flake.

Quote:
Originally Posted by liloulou View Post
Welcome back as well. I have a lot of experience with what you are going through, after having intervened on multiple suicide attemps of a close family member and still helping this family member find some sort of balance and peace. Just remember you will still have your highs and lows. Take each day for what it is and be patient and kind to yourself. Learn to love yourself again. Glad to hear you feel renewed and are in a better place. :-)
Thank you. Sadly, since I've opted against medication I suppose there is always the possibility that I could indeed crash and burn again at some point, but it's been nearly a week now since I've felt blue. Normally my "peaks" last, at most, 48 hours. This is something much more substantial. I felt something "click" again inside of me on Monday morning at my last therapy session. I think that was myself finally having an epiphany and getting myself back on track.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Beach-rat View Post
Welcome back..
Thank you!

Quote:
Originally Posted by DCguy03 View Post
I must say, your energy certainly makes a difference in this forum, and I surely missed it! Great to have you back!

Also, I'm still planning an Arlington photo tour inspired by your earlier series of photo tours in NoVA--I've been putting it off due to snow, but I don't have that excuse anymore! Look for it w/in the next week or two
Great to hear! I constantly razz people on the Restonian because they're afraid of Arlington, so perhaps once all of the Restonians on City-Data see some photos of "big bad Ballston" or "creepy Clarendon" they'll re-evaluate their positions. I took some photos today of Middleburg. I posted an extensive photo album on my Facebook profile of Winchester. Hopefully the next rainy day I'll spend some time converting that to a photo tour on City-Data.

Quote:
Originally Posted by anonymous703 View Post
RR,

Welcome back.

First, I agree with the poster who said, "I might not agree with you very often, but you are articulate..." and for that you are always a worthy adversary in a discussion/debate.

Whatever happened to Pittsburgh? For as much as I thought your rose colored glasses for that place were a bit too rosy, I also felt that at your income level, living here kinda sucks. I recall that you might be getting a substantial raise this year? That should help alleviate the feeling of "going nowhere" and hopefully lean towards feeling like you're "getting somewhere."
Someone on this forum once told me "you won't be happy anywhere until you're happy with yourself." That's true, and now that I have a fresh outlook on life I'm realizing Reston, for all of its warts, really isn't such a bad place after all. Believe it or not in addition to a "steal" of a condo I'm going to be looking at possibly renting in the town center from a couple I'm also deciding whether or not I'm going to rent in your complex as well. If I do decide to move literally across the street from the death trap...errr..."Candyland" I'm living at now I'll send you a DM so I can ask for your real name to put you down as a referral. I'd imagine you'd get a rent discount or something for me name-dropping you. If you don't feel comfortable with that I know the son of either Caladium or Denton56 (can't remember which) lives in your complex as well. Archstone was going to raise my rent on a 1-BR apartment to nearly $1,350/month, and not only do we not have any amenities (unless you count the "car care center" of a hose reel attached to a spigot in the parking lot), but also I've endured very frequent maintenance issues here. I'm ready for a change, but I'm not ready to give up just yet on Reston. I foresee this place undergoing some radical changes once Metro arrives, and when that does happen Reston will indeed become as "hip" as Arlington or Bethesda.

Quote:
Originally Posted by weezycom View Post
Welcome back. I was thinking of you the other day and hoped you were merely absent and hadn't done further harm to yourself. Glad to hear you're improved and improving.
Thanks for the concern. I was indeed moments away from doing myself in, but my faith is the one thing that stopped me and forced me to call for help.

Quote:
Originally Posted by movingtodcfromseattle View Post
Glad to *see* you are back. I've been curious as to your whereabouts and am glad to hear that you are okay.
Thanks. I'm back for good. I won't be quite as volatile as I've been in the past.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Yankeesfan View Post
SB/RR, I'm truly glad to see that you're back and genuinely happy to know that you are recuperating and feeling better and happier about your life. You have a lot going for you, including many talents. Please keep up with the counseling (including medication, if necessary) as often and as long as necessary so that you can enjoy life, as you deserve to. Welcome back!
Thanks, yankeesfan. I know I've sparred with you and a few others on here on occasion in the past, but I'm hoping to let bygones be bygones and let this new screenname herald in a true rebirth. It feels good to look at myself in the mirror and not feel like crying for a change. I wouldn't wish severe depression upon anyone. It gradually eats you away from the inside out until you feel so empty and so hollow you feel as if the world would be better off without you. Unfortunately society shuns people like me as being "crazy" when all it takes is a small bit of treatment for us to become productive members of society again.

Quote:
Originally Posted by adolpho View Post
good luck with your re-education.
Thank you.
 
Old 03-19-2010, 03:18 PM
 
Location: Home is where the heart is
15,400 posts, read 25,785,965 times
Reputation: 18989
Welcome back. If it helps, I've always found these 3 cliches to be remarkably helpful:

Easy does it.

This too shall pass.

Don't sweat the small stuff. And... everything is small stuff.

This may sound a little corny, but one time when I was really lonely I bought some seeds and grew some marigolds in my window. I chose marigolds because they were easy to grow (thought looking at a pot of dirt might depress me even more). Something about watching the seeds push through the dirt and grow a little more every day gave me a feeling of hope. You're watching life in the process of creation; that can be a very positive thing.
 
Old 03-19-2010, 03:31 PM
 
Location: San Jose, CA
1,318 posts, read 3,065,901 times
Reputation: 760
Quote:
Originally Posted by RestonRunner86 View Post



Someone on this forum once told me "you won't be happy anywhere until you're happy with yourself." That's true, and now that I have a fresh outlook on life I'm realizing Reston, for all of its warts, really isn't such a bad place after all. Believe it or not in addition to a "steal" of a condo I'm going to be looking at possibly renting in the town center from a couple I'm also deciding whether or not I'm going to rent in your complex as well. If I do decide to move literally across the street from the death trap...errr..."Candyland" I'm living at now I'll send you a DM so I can ask for your real name to put you down as a referral. I'd imagine you'd get a rent discount or something for me name-dropping you. If you don't feel comfortable with that I know the son of either Caladium or Denton56 (can't remember which) lives in your complex as well. Archstone was going to raise my rent on a 1-BR apartment to nearly $1,350/month, and not only do we not have any amenities (unless you count the "car care center" of a hose reel attached to a spigot in the parking lot), but also I've endured very frequent maintenance issues here. I'm ready for a change, but I'm not ready to give up just yet on Reston. I foresee this place undergoing some radical changes once Metro arrives, and when that does happen Reston will indeed become as "hip" as Arlington or Bethesda.
RR, If you're exercising often, some people experience an exercise high that tends to last past 12 hours after exercising. Good mood can run a long time after workout - USATODAY.com (http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/weightloss/2009-06-02-exercise-mood_N.htm - broken link). Something to think about.

A friend of mine has an apartment in Sycamores, it is a pretty decent place though it doesn't have a pool, but I guess that is less common there than here. It is a short distance from the W&OD trail which my friend has used to bike long distances before, so that's a plus.

Hope you stay healthy and in a good mood, don't let what strangers do bother you too much, if it is a one time encounter I just tend to brush it off, I would suggest you do the same. There is little point trying to dwell on an experience you had with someone you will likely never see again.

I do look forward to a reply on the other thread about rail transit.
 
Old 03-19-2010, 03:44 PM
 
257 posts, read 498,770 times
Reputation: 80
Quote:
Originally Posted by RestonRunner86 View Post
Someone on this forum once told me "you won't be happy anywhere until you're happy with yourself." That's true, and now that I have a fresh outlook on life I'm realizing Reston, for all of its warts, really isn't such a bad place after all.
It's not, although the restaurants at the RTC are terribly overpriced. My wife and I have taken up cooking as a bit of a hobby, and I enjoy that so much more than paying for an overpriced meal. It *does* drive me up the wall that I really can't walk from my crib to Harris Teeter. However, my wife and I have also taken up use of the W&OD trail. I really like being able to just walk for a couple of miles and not worry about traffic.

In the end, nightlife wise, I'm happy paying the lower rent out here, saving some $, and going into DC on the weekends when I feel like it.

Quote:
I'm living at now I'll send you a DM so I can ask for your real name to put you down as a referral. I'd imagine you'd get a rent discount or something for me name-dropping you. If you don't feel comfortable with that I know the son of either Caladium or Denton56 (can't remember which) lives in your complex as well.
Thanks, I've got no problem with that. FWIW, I think it's Denton56's son who lives here too.

Quote:
Archstone was going to raise my rent on a 1-BR apartment to nearly $1,350/month, and not only do we not have any amenities (unless you count the "car care center" of a hose reel attached to a spigot in the parking lot), but also I've endured very frequent maintenance issues here.
I'm glad you're keeping my crib in mind. After 15 months of living there, I think no less of it than the day I moved in. If you move in now, the units are still priced reasonably -- I keep an eye on the prices from time to time, and they seem to fluctuate with the seasons -- they go up in the spring/summer, and down in the winter. It's hard to make exact comparisons from the units available to mine, because I don't think I have any "deluxe upgrades," kitchen bar, "updated lighting," or any of that extra stuff. (Nor do I want to pay for it.)

Honestly, the biggest complain I have about this place is that EVERYTHING is electric. Electric heat is EXPENSIVE! My electric bill ranges from about $60-$70 in the spring/fall, $90 or so in the summer, and shoots up to $180 during peak heating season. Other than that, though, I still believe this complex offers some of the better value in the area.

Quote:
I'm ready for a change, but I'm not ready to give up just yet on Reston. I foresee this place undergoing some radical changes once Metro arrives, and when that does happen Reston will indeed become as "hip" as Arlington or Bethesda.
I sure hope so.
 
Old 03-19-2010, 05:25 PM
 
Location: Polish Hill, Pittsburgh, PA
30,107 posts, read 67,215,654 times
Reputation: 15758
Quote:
Originally Posted by normie View Post
Welcome back. If it helps, I've always found these 3 cliches to be remarkably helpful:

Easy does it.

This too shall pass.

Don't sweat the small stuff. And... everything is small stuff.

This may sound a little corny, but one time when I was really lonely I bought some seeds and grew some marigolds in my window. I chose marigolds because they were easy to grow (thought looking at a pot of dirt might depress me even more). Something about watching the seeds push through the dirt and grow a little more every day gave me a feeling of hope. You're watching life in the process of creation; that can be a very positive thing.
Thanks, Normie. Hearing your support means a lot since you're the unofficial "mayor" of the NoVA sub-forum. I actually just returned from touring a 1-BR condo in Reston Town Center that receives plenty of evening sunlight (Western exposure), so if I do sign the lease and move on into that place I'll look for plants that thrive in several hours of daily sunlight. Right now all I have is a cheap fake plant in my dining room that I bought on sale at Kirkland's in Dulles Town Center.

I think ultimately having something I could care for would really perk me up. I was focusing a lot of my energy on trying to find a person whom I could nurture, cherish, and pamper, but obviously that isn't meant to be with the quality of the gay dating scene I've experience thus far in Reston. I've always wanted a bunny, AND a sunflower!

Quote:
Originally Posted by cardinal2007 View Post
RR, If you're exercising often, some people experience an exercise high that tends to last past 12 hours after exercising. Good mood can run a long time after workout - USATODAY.com (http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/weightloss/2009-06-02-exercise-mood_N.htm - broken link). Something to think about.

A friend of mine has an apartment in Sycamores, it is a pretty decent place though it doesn't have a pool, but I guess that is less common there than here. It is a short distance from the W&OD trail which my friend has used to bike long distances before, so that's a plus.

Hope you stay healthy and in a good mood, don't let what strangers do bother you too much, if it is a one time encounter I just tend to brush it off, I would suggest you do the same. There is little point trying to dwell on an experience you had with someone you will likely never see again.

I do look forward to a reply on the other thread about rail transit.
Thanks for the heads-up, but I was also excercising often during my 1-2 day "peaks", so I know this is something much more sustained. I just feel differently now than I had in weeks (and months) prior. Life is good, and I'm not just saying that for a change.

Not having a pool isn't a big deal to me. Besides, as a resident of Reston, which in and of itself is a giant HOA, I get access to any public pool. My only beef with this is many of the complexes here try to advertise this access as being some sort of "exclusive perk" (my current complex does this), hoping that newcomers won't realize that EVERYONE can use the pools. I go running quite frequently on the W&OD Trail. I would have gone today, but I have a 5K early tomorrow morning, and since my shower is currently out of comission (more maintenance issues with Archstone!) I didn't want to get all sweaty this evening, sleep in my own filth, and then show up all gross to the run tomorrow.

Actually, it's a very, very long story about what happened to me in January. I also had to worry about potential health concerns in my family, work was stressful, and on the romantic front I was mortified---a guy who led me on last summer only to fizzle out letting me think he was straight was seen by me at a party kissing a colleague who also led me on only to reject me, let me think HE was straight, and then both flaunted this new relationship in my face, bragging most recently about a romantic foray to Florida. When I was suffering from low self-esteem to begin with this sense of "Am I really that disgusting?" just hurt terribly. I've been single long-term, and it looks like I'll continue to be single long-term, especially since there are NO YOUNG GAY SINGLES IN RESTON!! I need to get myself a houseplant to talk to at night.

Quote:
Originally Posted by anonymous703 View Post
It's not, although the restaurants at the RTC are terribly overpriced. My wife and I have taken up cooking as a bit of a hobby, and I enjoy that so much more than paying for an overpriced meal. It *does* drive me up the wall that I really can't walk from my crib to Harris Teeter. However, my wife and I have also taken up use of the W&OD trail. I really like being able to just walk for a couple of miles and not worry about traffic.

In the end, nightlife wise, I'm happy paying the lower rent out here, saving some $, and going into DC on the weekends when I feel like it.



Thanks, I've got no problem with that. FWIW, I think it's Denton56's son who lives here too.



I'm glad you're keeping my crib in mind. After 15 months of living there, I think no less of it than the day I moved in. If you move in now, the units are still priced reasonably -- I keep an eye on the prices from time to time, and they seem to fluctuate with the seasons -- they go up in the spring/summer, and down in the winter. It's hard to make exact comparisons from the units available to mine, because I don't think I have any "deluxe upgrades," kitchen bar, "updated lighting," or any of that extra stuff. (Nor do I want to pay for it.)

Honestly, the biggest complain I have about this place is that EVERYTHING is electric. Electric heat is EXPENSIVE! My electric bill ranges from about $60-$70 in the spring/fall, $90 or so in the summer, and shoots up to $180 during peak heating season. Other than that, though, I still believe this complex offers some of the better value in the area.



I sure hope so.
Ideally I'd pounce upon this place I toured tonight in Reston Town Center, but the couple who seeks to lease it out seems to be looking ASAP and has "additional interest." I'm sure someone else will snatch it up by the end of the weekend. Something in your complex did just open up the same weekend I'm looking to relocate in May, so this may just work. I'll send you a DM if I do decide to lease at your complex so you can enjoy the rent referral bonus.

Utility costs don't concern me much. My utilities have been very reasonably priced here, and once I snag my 25% raise in June (along with a hefty bonus), I'll be secure enough financially where I won't need to worry. I've also been seriously considering Colvin Woods because of how cheap it is, but I'm not entirely sold on the idea of having a "laundry room." We're out in the suburbia. It's not like "lack of space" was a consideration when they decided to NOT put a washer/dryer in individual units. Nevertheless they have a 1-BR/den floorplan that I really love (with none available!). I'm also on a waiting list at several different complexes. I don't understand it. In May 2009 when I moved to Reston apartment communities were DESPERATE for tenants. They jumped through hoops to court me. This year everywhere I'm going is 100% occupied. No wonder why rents are soaring in Reston! Shut the damn NIMBYs up and throw up some more high-rises already to increase supply to make the prices come back down to Earth!

I don't need luxury. What I don't appreciate is having had to bug maintenance an average of once per month since I moved in for moderate to major issues. I also don't appreciate being asked to renew at a price that is as much as either a luxury 1-BR in Reston (which this is not) or a typical 2-BR. I made that CRYSTAL CLEAR in the letter I typed up and submitted to provide advance notice of my intent to vacate. The "comps" for my complex should be The Sycamores, Fairway Apartments, Parc Reston, and maybe Colvin Woods. They seem to be using their sister community of Archstone Reston Landing as a "comp" when that place is MUCH more luxurious than our own complex. It's sheer idiocy. I've talked to numerous people who wish to move out. They're pricing out their best tenants, and they're going to end up with the trash in the end.

Not "all" Reston Town Center restaurants are overpriced (if you hit them just right). I like to to Clyde's before 6 PM when you can get great deals on meals. Sometimes American Tap Room is a good bet as well. Otherwise I agree that you pay out the nose for mediocre food at places like McCormick & Schmick's, Jackson's, Cosi, Macaroni Grill, etc. It's a shame Reston doesn't have more independently-owned smaller restaurants; Lake Anne is just about ready to collapse and has been on life support for God knows how many years because there aren't enough people living in the immediate area to support the businesses there. More high-rises near Lake Anne (i.e. atop the huge surface parking lot) would be good.

Last edited by bmwguydc; 03-21-2010 at 09:31 AM.. Reason: Let's leave the past in the past with regard to the forum.
 
Old 03-19-2010, 08:49 PM
 
Location: Metro Washington DC
13,039 posts, read 19,866,531 times
Reputation: 7641
Welcome Back!
 
Old 03-19-2010, 09:01 PM
 
159 posts, read 337,205 times
Reputation: 49
Very happy for you. I sit on the sidelines to read posts, and I always enjoy your posts
 
Old 03-19-2010, 09:37 PM
 
Location: Washington, DC & New York
10,830 posts, read 26,354,116 times
Reputation: 6895
Welcome back!
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Old 03-19-2010, 10:06 PM
 
427 posts, read 973,667 times
Reputation: 257
Welcome back! I was just wondering about you this morning. Glad to hear that you're okay and getting okayer by the day.
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