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Old 05-18-2010, 05:31 PM
 
Location: Richmond, VA
2,306 posts, read 1,376,163 times
Reputation: 949

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I didn't read the other posts so forgive me if this is the same...

You will find this almost anywhere you go. Our society is full of the have's and the have nots. It's really up to who you surround youself with on your inner circle and your ability to not let what others think get to you.

Loudoun County is the 1st or 2nd wealthiest county in the COUNTRY. So...you are going to have a lot of the HAVE's. But you are also going to get those who just get by. Some of the wealthiest people I know do NOT flaunt it but live rather simple lives. I find its those who are trying to over compensate who have the high end everything...and typically they have the high credit card balances to go with it.

I stayed at home for 2 1/2 years and I have a college degree. I did so b/c it was CHEAPER for me to stay home than to work as daycare expenses are very high. (I have twins who are toddlers. Now that I am back to work I pay $500 a WEEK for daycare at your run of the mill place...Not one of the fancy ones!) Where I live-and many of the other areas here-there are a lot of stay at home moms. I was part of the MOms Club here in Ashburn and found it great to make friends and have 3-4 activities a week for my kids.

One great thing about living here is that education is of great importance. One reason we continue to live here despite the high cost of living (i.e. housing) is b/c of the opportunities my kids will have over what my husband and I grew up with.

I hope you have a great move and find yourself a fabulous circle of friends to be with. I recently joined a meet-up group for working moms and found it a perfect fit.

Good luck!
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Old 05-18-2010, 08:17 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, NC, formerly DC and Phila
8,569 posts, read 12,683,353 times
Reputation: 8334
I don't find this area to be particularly snobby, but I'm sure there are certain neighborhoods and towns that are snobbier and have more of a "keeping up with the Joneses" mentality than others. I do agree with many others that it depends on where you come from. From Main Line Philadelphia? No people do not seem as snobby here compared to there. From a little town in Kansas? I imagine the people might seem snobby.

Having said that, I lived across the river in Bethesda/Rockville for 10 years and found the people there to be much snobbier/competitive monetarily/having more of a "keeping up with the Joneses" mentality compared to Northern Virginia. That's why I like it here so much better.

I live in Vienna, and I find most people to be down to earth and friendly - maybe it's because I live on the less wealthy side of town. But I never hesitate to tell people I bought my child's outfit at a thrift store or that I got my kids' sand and water table from the neighbors' trash pile. I don't feel like I have to dress up, shop at fancy stores or drop names to fit in with the people in my neighborhood or town. That's not to say there aren't places in NoVA where that isn't the case but I don't find it to be like that where I live.
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Old 05-18-2010, 08:19 PM
 
3,164 posts, read 6,133,497 times
Reputation: 1264
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alanboy395 View Post
VERY very high.
Really? How many kids do you have? What schools do they attend? How many SAHMs were in your neighborhood?

Oh wait, you're a single guy in your 20's who briefly lived in NOVA.

Nevermind.
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Old 05-18-2010, 08:23 PM
 
3,164 posts, read 6,133,497 times
Reputation: 1264
Vienna has TONS of stay at home moms, so does Oakton, and McLean. I never thought there was a keep up with Joneses attitude. Some single young people appear to be envious of others who have more money than they have, but families are not like that. Moms and Dads are Moms and Dads, too busy to be concerned if their neighbors drive a newer van than they do!
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Old 05-19-2010, 04:48 AM
 
Location: Arlington, VA and Washington, DC
23,651 posts, read 33,462,505 times
Reputation: 32369
Quote:
Originally Posted by Denton56 View Post
Really? How many kids do you have? What schools do they attend? How many SAHMs were in your neighborhood?

Oh wait, you're a single guy in your 20's who briefly lived in NOVA.

Nevermind.
I have no kids and surely never want any. I went to T.C. Williams HS for 2 years and saw the high materialism here firsthand. I also worked retail so I saw how much people put into posessions. I didn't even talk to any of my neighbors (and they returned the favor.) So I know nothing about or don't care about how many SAHMs there were.

You call six years brief? If I was in the military I'd be starting a third PCS since when you are military it's basically 3 years and you are out.

Stop disrespecting me because I'm probably 1/3 of your age.
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Old 05-19-2010, 05:13 AM
 
Location: Zone 6B ~ Northern VA
1,815 posts, read 2,420,460 times
Reputation: 560
Exactly! It says alot about those that are more concerned with how they look to their friends and neighbors than being able to live your life the way you want. Life is too short to live it through the eyes of someone else.

Quote:
Originally Posted by EuroExpat View Post
ITA!!

Why are people so concerned what others have and don't have, including their level of education? Just focus on your own life and you'll be happy.
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Old 05-19-2010, 08:05 AM
 
Location: Northern Virginia
1,419 posts, read 3,020,894 times
Reputation: 434
I do think it completely depends on where you live in NoVA. I just moved here from the metro NYC area of CT where everyone was concerned about labels and status. Here where I live in Western Loudoun county, no one cares. They may be wealthy out here, but they don't care if you are or aren't. I have been happily able to shop at Kohl's again and not think my kids would be laughed out of school

I'm sure closer in, it's completely different, but out here, Leesburg and on west, not noticable at all.
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Old 05-19-2010, 09:47 AM
 
159 posts, read 337,717 times
Reputation: 49
LOL Good ONE!


Quote:
Originally Posted by yamota View Post
please, everyone just calm down, let's just all get into our Mercedes Benzes and drive back home to our mansions so that we can relax and order our butlers to bring us some wine and crackers
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Old 05-19-2010, 10:40 AM
 
Location: Brambleton, VA
2,136 posts, read 4,647,865 times
Reputation: 1292
Quote:
Originally Posted by arielmina View Post
I do think it completely depends on where you live in NoVA. I just moved here from the metro NYC area of CT where everyone was concerned about labels and status. Here where I live in Western Loudoun county, no one cares. They may be wealthy out here, but they don't care if you are or aren't. I have been happily able to shop at Kohl's again and not think my kids would be laughed out of school

I'm sure closer in, it's completely different, but out here, Leesburg and on west, not noticable at all.
I've noticed here in the Ashburn area that there's almost a reverse obsession with getting deals. Like, yeah, people want the $800-retail stroller because it's nice, but they don't want to pay that much, so they vigorously compete with others for the available used inventory at consignment sales, yard sales, Craigslist, etc., and then boast about how little they paid. People join Moms of Multiples and MOPS just to get the early-day shopping privilege at their sales. Loaners circulate through the neighborhood too - we loaned our infants seats and double stroller to a neighbor with twins; another neighbor loaned us a bouncer; etc. Instead of one-upmanship, there's a lot of community effort. There might be some people who absolutely must have brand-new designer goods for their kids, but most parents I know seem to see that as ridiculous (especially when you can often get the same brand-new designer goods at consignment sales or from eBay).

I'm really sensitive to this issue of snobbery because I grew up really poor and I went to private school on scholarship (I did high-school-based work-study, and had a job after school). I was also probably one of the poorest kids at Georgetown, and one of the few to have ever lived in a trailer park. I learned early on how to not give a darn about what clothes or goodies other people have, because I wasn't going to get them. Now that I have the money to get them, I know that there are other things I'd rather do with my money (like travel, or retirement, or my kids' 529s). We have two Hyundais (one of them is paid off!), and I don't feel like any of my neighbors is judging us for it. If they are, so what? I think most people are too busy just trying to live and enjoy their own lives to worry about what others are or are not doing with their money. It's rather self-centered to think that other people are thinking about you all the time, even in a negative way.
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Old 05-19-2010, 10:43 AM
 
Location: Loudoun County, VA
1,148 posts, read 3,370,259 times
Reputation: 402
Quote:
Originally Posted by cdmurphy View Post
I don't feel like any of my neighbors is judging us for it. If they are, so what? I think most people are too busy just trying to live and enjoy their own lives to worry about what others are or are not doing with their money. It's rather self-centered to think that other people are thinking about you all the time, even in a negative way.
Loved your post, especially the above part!
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