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Unread 05-23-2008, 07:16 AM
 
702 posts, read 1,281,662 times
Reputation: 504
Quote:
Originally Posted by verynicebecky View Post
Oh gees. I learned that my husband was having an affair. I made this discovery on Christmas Eve of 1997. He was at that time a police officer, having an affair with one of the dispatchers. When I confronted him, he was relieved..didn't know how he was gonna tell me..blah, blah, blah. I wanted to work on the marriage, he wanted out..so out he went. I was devistated. I didn't even get an attorney. Luckily I gained custody of all 3 kids. Anyway, he married this lady and they bought a farm (this happened in Harper Co.) A yr later he files to gain custody of the kids. I was a single working mom. I had been dating a minister who moved onto Colorado. I got a notice in the mail for a court date for the custody hearing in one month (this was the 1st I was learning about this). I was still in communication with the minister. I called him and sought out an attorney. The attorney suggested that I get married so things would appear "stable." So, you can guess what happened. Yes, the minister moved back to OK and we quickly got married...and like magic the custody court date was cancelled. I quit my job as the town newspaper reporter, we moved across the state line into KS and I spent 4 miserable yrs married to the minister. We divorced when the older kids were of age to decide whom they wanted to live with. They stayed with me and we remained in KS for a school yr and then we moved to Nevada. My daughter stayed back to attend college in KS and my older son went back to KS and lived with my divorce attorney (his son was my son's best friend) for his 11th grade yr. This option was not available to him this yr and he opted to move in with his dad and graduate hs from Laverne, which he did the other night. Things have been fine and dandy up until this point. I just learned this morning that my ex and his wife are divorcing and he is involved with another woman with 3 young kids. I did not learn this from him. I learned part of it from our youngest son, who has been stressed out keeping it a secret for a week about his dad divorcing (he didn't know about the GF) and his dad putting pressure upon him to move and live in OK with him. I learned about the GF by contacting an old friend back there, and then when the ex called me a bit ago about plane tickets for our son, I asked him why our son was having a melt down and my ex confirmed everything that I learned this morn! It just pisses me off that I had to get married to appear that I was in a "stable relationship" just to keep custody of my kids and this A$$hole can't keep his ownself in a "stable" relationship...so, that is my rant.
And thus the reason why Oklahoma is the divorce capitol of the world!! First, never listen to a lawyer, they are mostly all crooks or idiots or both!
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Unread 05-23-2008, 08:08 AM
 
Location: OK
2,308 posts, read 2,990,248 times
Reputation: 1291
Quote:
Originally Posted by briansgi View Post
And thus the reason why Oklahoma is the divorce capitol of the world!!
The world is a little bigger than the US. However, Oklahoma doesn't even rank in the top 3. That honor goes to Nevada, Arkansas and Alaska.

Divorce Rates by State, 1990–2005 — Infoplease.com
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Unread 05-23-2008, 08:43 AM
 
702 posts, read 1,281,662 times
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That's good news, for the longest times we were number 1 in a category we did not want to be number 1 in! You got to love this, now the so called "experts" are blaming organized religion as the reason why there is such a huge divorce rate in the bible belt. The more you think about it, it does make sense:

"Fundamentalist churchgoers are often exposed to "fairytale conceptions of marriage," said the Rev. Robin Meyers, a Congregational minister in Oklahoma City. He describes himself as one of the few liberal clergymen in the nation's most conservative state.

"They have that whole dogma of 'This is right, this is wrong' and nothing in between," Meyers said. "They don't have the mental dexterity to make the adjustments to a less than perfect marriage."

Bible Belt divorce rate leads nation | Topeka Capital-Journal, The | Find Articles at BNET.com

I'd love to see statistics on this! I'll bet you would find the marriages in the "non believers" homes would have a much much lower divorce rate than all those holy roller church goers in the bible belt states. I guess I'm a good example, been married once to the same woman for over 25 years and haven't sat foot in a church since my mom use to drag us kids to Sunday school 40 years ago!

I always say I'm a recovering drug addict, I was drug to church every week when I was a kid by my mom!
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Unread 05-23-2008, 05:24 PM
 
Location: Fort Worth/Dallas
11,890 posts, read 21,339,840 times
Reputation: 5252
Quote:
Originally Posted by Schousse View Post
The world is a little bigger than the US. However, Oklahoma doesn't even rank in the top 3. That honor goes to Nevada, Arkansas and Alaska.

Divorce Rates by State, 1990–2005 — Infoplease.com
My thoughts exactly. I was wondering where that erroneous stat came from. Thanks for clearing that up Schousse!
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Unread 05-23-2008, 05:27 PM
 
Location: Fort Worth/Dallas
11,890 posts, read 21,339,840 times
Reputation: 5252
Quote:
Originally Posted by briansgi View Post
That's good news, for the longest times we were number 1 in a category we did not want to be number 1 in! You got to love this, now the so called "experts" are blaming organized religion as the reason why there is such a huge divorce rate in the bible belt. The more you think about it, it does make sense:

"Fundamentalist churchgoers are often exposed to "fairytale conceptions of marriage," said the Rev. Robin Meyers, a Congregational minister in Oklahoma City. He describes himself as one of the few liberal clergymen in the nation's most conservative state.

"They have that whole dogma of 'This is right, this is wrong' and nothing in between," Meyers said. "They don't have the mental dexterity to make the adjustments to a less than perfect marriage."

Bible Belt divorce rate leads nation | Topeka Capital-Journal, The | Find Articles at BNET.com

I'd love to see statistics on this! I'll bet you would find the marriages in the "non believers" homes would have a much much lower divorce rate than all those holy roller church goers in the bible belt states. I guess I'm a good example, been married once to the same woman for over 25 years and haven't sat foot in a church since my mom use to drag us kids to Sunday school 40 years ago!

I always say I'm a recovering drug addict, I was drug to church every week when I was a kid by my mom!
I don't think religion plays the major role in divorces, but society that conflicts with religion.

When the majority of the population was more religious, divorce rates were lower.

Today, you have television and other media making out marriage to be less "binding" and although religion plays an important part in people's lives, the impact of the media (particularly television) has a far greater impact than it once did.

I'm not preaching here, just stating my opinion.
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Unread 05-23-2008, 07:02 PM
 
Location: Banner Elk NC
686 posts, read 1,493,371 times
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This brings to mind that when I was living in Harper Co. a very fine family was torn apart. The father (who was a deacon) was having an affair with the church secretary. Both marriages ended in divorce. Sad deal.
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Unread 05-23-2008, 07:26 PM
 
Location: Where there is too much snow!
5,755 posts, read 5,808,226 times
Reputation: 2305
Quote:
Originally Posted by SeabeeBolt View Post
Hey little lady, why don't you try one of these one for size?! Maybe this will take care of your two legged troubles!! KAAPOWWW!!! With one of these babies, you won't even have fingerprints to worry about .
I'M TELLIN YA LITTLE LADY YOU NEED ONE OF THESE BABIES!!!! A BAZOOKA AND NOT THE BUBBLE GUM IETHER.
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Unread 05-23-2008, 09:41 PM
 
Location: Banner Elk NC
686 posts, read 1,493,371 times
Reputation: 353
Quote:
Originally Posted by SeabeeBolt View Post
I'M TELLIN YA LITTLE LADY YOU NEED ONE OF THESE BABIES!!!! A BAZOOKA AND NOT THE BUBBLE GUM IETHER.
I think I should let him live a little longer so he can make an even bigger fool of himself.
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Unread 05-24-2008, 07:01 AM
 
Location: Where there is too much snow!
5,755 posts, read 5,808,226 times
Reputation: 2305
Quote:
Originally Posted by verynicebecky View Post
I think I should let him live a little longer so he can make an even bigger fool of himself.
Now thats the greatest revenge there is, "Let them make fools out ot themselves".
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Unread 05-28-2008, 11:54 AM
 
Location: Cedar City, Utah
4,093 posts, read 4,653,674 times
Reputation: 1528
Quote:
Originally Posted by verynicebecky View Post
Just to keep the ex's tires flattened. Amazing how a divorce that occured over 10 yrs ago can still affect a person today.

nevermind me...just my little rant. i am having a wonderful day. a baseball bat would be too good for this man.

Did you like Oklahoma when you were here though? You say you might have to move back here like it's a bad thing?
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