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Old 05-30-2009, 02:44 PM
 
Location: Bennington NE
119 posts, read 386,856 times
Reputation: 70

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My fiance and I are getting married in October and I've put off finding an officiant...

We are not getting married in a church, opting instead for a ceremony downtown at the Artists Cooperative Gallery. I was raised Catholic but fall more in line with non-denominational christian beliefs. I don't wear faith on my sleeve but I would really like a wedding ceremony that incorporates some religious words. We are not members of any church...

Anyone have advice about churches to look into or ministers, pastors, reverends, etc.? I think I am disappointing my dad and grandmother by not marrying in the catholic church and feel that getting a religious figure rather than just a justice of the peace is a good comprimise (plus i would prefer that also).
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Old 05-30-2009, 03:02 PM
 
Location: I think my user name clarifies that.
8,293 posts, read 23,180,204 times
Reputation: 3889
Quote:
Originally Posted by vpandora View Post
My fiance and I are getting married in October and I've put off finding an officiant...

We are not getting married in a church, opting instead for a ceremony downtown at the Artists Cooperative Gallery. I was raised Catholic but fall more in line with non-denominational christian beliefs. I don't wear faith on my sleeve but I would really like a wedding ceremony that incorporates some religious words. We are not members of any church...

Anyone have advice about churches to look into or ministers, pastors, reverends, etc.? I think I am disappointing my dad and grandmother by not marrying in the catholic church and feel that getting a religious figure rather than just a justice of the peace is a good comprimise (plus i would prefer that also).
I don't want to be ugly about this, but if you aren't members of any church, and don't go to any church, then why do you want a reverend or pastor to do your wedding?
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Old 05-30-2009, 03:23 PM
 
Location: Bennington NE
119 posts, read 386,856 times
Reputation: 70
Quote:
Originally Posted by Omaha Rocks View Post
I don't want to be ugly about this, but if you aren't members of any church, and don't go to any church, then why do you want a reverend or pastor to do your wedding?
Well, I'll admit its a valid question that is tough to answer... I suppose at the very core of it, I want our ceremony to be more than a civil ceremony; a way to remind us that God is at the heart of our life together.

Perhaps a justice of the peace who doesn't mind using some religious readings would do just fine, but I wanted to explore my options. I certainly don't want a religious officiant just because my dad does or because I feel it will help our marriage more than if we didn't have one.
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Old 05-30-2009, 03:52 PM
 
Location: West Omaha
1,181 posts, read 3,652,191 times
Reputation: 477
I think a very large number of people have these feelings. They believe in god in a general sense but do not prescribe to any single religion. Quite honestly, I think its probably the most nuanced religious positions one can have.
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Old 05-30-2009, 04:16 PM
 
Location: I think my user name clarifies that.
8,293 posts, read 23,180,204 times
Reputation: 3889
Quote:
Originally Posted by vpandora View Post
Well, I'll admit its a valid question that is tough to answer... I suppose at the very core of it, I want our ceremony to be more than a civil ceremony; a way to remind us that God is at the heart of our life together.

Perhaps a justice of the peace who doesn't mind using some religious readings would do just fine, but I wanted to explore my options. I certainly don't want a religious officiant just because my dad does or because I feel it will help our marriage more than if we didn't have one.
Okay.
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Old 05-30-2009, 04:55 PM
 
Location: Papillion
2,585 posts, read 9,545,862 times
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I'm sure there are variations based on denomination, but the ministers I know won't consider marrying someone unless they agree to marriage counseling with them and also have a very serious faith discussion.
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Old 05-30-2009, 08:58 PM
 
Location: West Omaha
1,181 posts, read 3,652,191 times
Reputation: 477
I was just at a wedding in April (in Denver) that pretty much fit what the OP is looking for. He was an "officiant" who injected a fair amount of religious context. It was certainly well beyond a justice of the peace type wedding but less than what you'd see at a typical denominational wedding.

I would also agree with Dave, you won't be able to go to a church and get a reverend or pastor to marry you with out some sort of counseling.

Anyway, what you are seeking does in fact exist, but you won't get it through a church.
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Old 06-01-2009, 10:00 AM
 
Location: Here
704 posts, read 1,617,610 times
Reputation: 327
Anyone can get "ordained" online and officiate your ceremony and you can have them use as much or as little religious imaery as you like. We had a close friend do our ceremony and he did a great job. Our marriage is just as legal as anyone else's and it really felt like "our" wedding.
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Old 06-01-2009, 11:41 AM
 
Location: I think my user name clarifies that.
8,293 posts, read 23,180,204 times
Reputation: 3889
Quote:
Originally Posted by dsrich98 View Post
Anyone can get "ordained" online and officiate your ceremony and you can have them use as much or as little religious imaery as you like. We had a close friend do our ceremony and he did a great job. Our marriage is just as legal as anyone else's and it really felt like "our" wedding.
In Nebraska, the "officiant" doesn't have to be ordained.

It's kind of weird. Basically, what makes it "legal and binding" is the signatures of the 2 witnesses and the officiant.
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Old 06-01-2009, 01:32 PM
 
Location: Here
704 posts, read 1,617,610 times
Reputation: 327
Quote:
Originally Posted by Omaha Rocks View Post
In Nebraska, the "officiant" doesn't have to be ordained.

It's kind of weird. Basically, what makes it "legal and binding" is the signatures of the 2 witnesses and the officiant.

There you have it!!

The fact that we used someone we knew and trusted, not just some hired gun, made a great day that much better.
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