U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > California > Orange County
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Old 10-02-2010, 12:58 PM
2 posts, read 4,994 times
Reputation: 10


I'm new here and I'm in a bit of a dilemma right now where my 13 year old daughter is concerned. We live in Yorba Linda and are within the new high school boundaries. She attended elementary and middle school in the Placentia area because she was in the GATE program. She has made friends in that area and I'm not too thrilled about her company.

She has started school at the new high school and refuses to make friends and doesn't even want to do her homework. She is always angry that she is away from her friends. Her friends are all within the El Dorado High School boundaries and attend that school as it is their home school in Placentia.

I went to the new High School and loved it. The teachers, parents and students seem so responsible and it is even better than the private school my son went to. Her father has an apartment in the Fullerton area and she could get a spot at El Dorado High School.

I have a lot of behavioral issues with her right now. But if we just continuously force her to go, she is losing academic time which is a concern.

I really wished she would have been open to making friends in the new high school as it is just literally two minutes from our house...but she is so stubborn and anxious about not going there. She is glued to those friends and won't entertain the idea of making new ones..

What are eveybody's thoughts about the school? How is the environment and educational platform? I just want to see my daughter progress and be healthy, happy and successful. At the end, I want her to have a career goal and go to a good college.

Thanks for any tips!

Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

Old 10-02-2010, 05:00 PM
Location: Everywhere and Nowhere
14,132 posts, read 25,533,658 times
Reputation: 6778
I'd say let her go where her friends are but make a deal with her that she has to get As and Bs there. Is this really about her or your relationship with your ex-husband?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 10-02-2010, 08:09 PM
Location: Las Flores, Orange County, CA
26,346 posts, read 78,935,212 times
Reputation: 17319
I would recommend family counseling first. Your intuitions are raising yellow flags about her friends and her approach to school. This isn't really a school boundary issue as much as it is a family issue.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 10-02-2010, 09:14 PM
2 posts, read 4,994 times
Reputation: 10
Thanks for the responses. I do agree that this is a familial issue and we are working on getting her to see a therapist. She is a bright child intellectually but very foolish and not as wise and understanding that she should be. My husband (who is not my ex...but we are considering separation) is manipulated by her constantly and he lets her manipulate/abuse/disobey rules because he believes she is a mentally ill child. I disagree and think she was spoiled by him and manipulated him so much that she eventually thought that why do I need mom's discipline?

For the past two years, we have been having problems because our parenting styles are different. He thinks she is ill mentally and the only way she will be independent is if we let her blackmail us into performing academically and will eventually mature. I don't think she is mentally ill but just a spoiled child who has learned how to push her father's buttons. She has more control over him than I do...a big reason why we are considering separating.

Her profanity towards me is out of control, but really right now she is so miserable and irritable without her friends that it is harming her academically. I'm asking myself the question....if she ruins her academic career when she has the potential to excel....is it really worth the change? I want to prepare her for the outside world and want her to have a good character, sense of responsibility, ethic, etc. and I'm wondering if the school would have a big influence or will this maturity just come naturally.

Since a lot of you are more experienced than I am in the area, perhaps you could advise more. Would I be seeing a big difference in the overall quality of the atmosphere between El Dorado and Yorba Linda High School (new school)? I want her to have the best, but at the same time I want her to be happy and healthy.

Sorry if this post is a little incoherent. I'm a bit upset/anxious at the moment with the way things are at home. I just want things to work out for the best for my kids and I hope that I make the right decision.

Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Old 10-02-2010, 10:06 PM
Location: Las Flores, Orange County, CA
26,346 posts, read 78,935,212 times
Reputation: 17319
This is not objective, but it may provide a little more commentary than this forum will:

Parent Reviews of El Dorado High School - Placentia, California - CA

Parent Reviews of Yorba Linda High School - Yorba Linda, California - CA

They both rank high with Great Schools.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.

Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply

Loading data...
Based on 2000-2016 data
Loading data...

Hide US histogram

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > U.S. Forums > California > Orange County
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or
Similar Threads
View detailed profiles of:

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2017, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32 - Top