ORANGE COUNTY versus San Diego/other? (how much, home, school)

[kettlepot]

Originally Posted by dakicka

yes obviously 80% + 30% does not equal 100%, that was a typo, i like to add to this forum and post some half-way relevant and rational replies, sometimes however I am in a rush, hence the miscalculation. My deepest apologies to you sir/madam.

Your rebuttal or response if you will to my comments pretty much sums up why I post the things that I do about the MAJORITY of the people around here. It's quite obvious you are one of 'those people' I speak about, by your condescending tone and lack of class and personal attack on me in your words. If you bothered to read any of my other posts it is apparent I do have a successful a career, even at a young age, and I am in search of meeting 'real' people with real values that do not succumb to the ridiculous thought that you must have at least a 3 series BMW to 'fit' in (give me a break) and my interaction with personalities of 'your type' is the reason for some of the less than positive posts. I know there are at least some decent, level headed people on this forum and I'm happy it exists as a place for us all to share our feelings and get guidance/support on questions, and to HELP each other rather than personally attack individuals with ridiculous comments like you so cowardly did to me.

Actually dakicka, I think the original poster you were quoting is a troll, who probably made his post either facetiously or as an agent provocateur to stereotype and besmirch the general reputations of people from OC.

Sometimes people make posts just to be funny but that end up coming off wrong. The other day there was a thread asking what was the best side of Modesto? Reading that I was sorely tempted to say the "OUTSIDE - as far outside Modesto as you can get!" even though I've never even been there and know nothing about the city. I thought better of it, and let the topic alone. Perhaps the previous poster should have too.

[A Proud American]

Originally Posted by dakicka

Your rebuttal or response if you will to my comments pretty much sums up why I post the things that I do about the MAJORITY of the people around here. It's quite obvious you are one of 'those people' I speak about, by your condescending tone and lack of class and personal attack on me in your words

I'm sorry if I came off as overly harsh but I felt that an honest reply is better than sugar-coating the situation. Nothing in there was meant as a personal attack so don't take it that way. My aim is to describe the way things are, not to trash people.

So... back to the subject at hand. I don't understand why you don't want to drive a nice car, tell people what you do for a living, etc.? Aren't you proud of what you have accomplished?

[A Proud American]

Originally Posted by kettlepot

Actually dakicka, I think the original poster you were quoting is a troll, who probably made his post either facetiously or as an agent provocateur to stereotype and besmirch the general reputations of people from OC.

No, my post was completely serious. That is just how things work around here and there is nothing we can do to change it. Love it or leave it. I choose the former.

[kettlepot]

Originally Posted by A Proud American

No, my post was completely serious. That is just how things work around here and there is nothing we can do to change it. Love it or leave it. I choose the former.

Fair enough. I commend you for your cool-headed response.

[dakicka]

Originally Posted by A Proud American

I'm sorry if I came off as overly harsh but I felt that an honest reply is better than sugar-coating the situation. Nothing in there was meant as a personal attack so don't take it that way. My aim is to describe the way things are, not to trash people.

So... back to the subject at hand. I don't understand why you don't want to drive a nice car, tell people what you do for a living, etc.? Aren't you proud of what you have accomplished?

Sure I take pride in what I do and the success I have achieved at a young age but I do not think it's right for me to boast or make it a focus of a conversation when meeting someone brand new. I would rather get to know someone for who they are, what they like to do for fun, what they value, things that they enjoy, what makes them tick... I never size someone up based on what they do. I know so many people in various careers with contrasting personalities. I think it is absurd to think you can label someone based on their line or work or even based on their financial stability. I have met some of the most wonderful people who are multi-millionaires and likewise I have met some real dirtbag, immature, self-centered millionaires. I have also met people who are down and out with no career going for them, and other people with run of the mill jobs but have the happiest life going because they value more important things and money is not a source of happiness, it's more of a source to live, and #1 comes their wife/kids, etc. Yes, money does bring things a bit easier and makes life more manageable sometimes, however much negativity comes with it. The point is I think too many people out here put money as too much of a priority in their life. I'd much rather be making 100K a year with no debt and the happiest man on the planet with peace, a beautiful caring wife, a kid, and a nice home, than be some ******* who makes 500K a year with a crummy relationship and maybe an impending divorce with a job who stresses him out with no freedom or flexibility for family, never watches the kids football or baseball games and has better relationships with his colleagues than his spouse. I could be crazy but I think the prior sounds like a much better path.

"So what do you do", "What kind of car do you drive" and other similar questions of that nature for a first few phrases of a conversation are a bit too forward in my opinion and generally with a wrongful objective. I certainly do not want to fill out a credit application or turn over my W2's when I meet someone new to make sure I "pass their criteria" and that I'm worthy enough of their company. It is an absolute joke to think money, status, career, and car are a few of the most important aspects of life. Clearly we do not see eye to eye and that is fine, as the world needs people of all walks and lives and that is what keeps things interesting. I thank you for the reply that you had that I responded to a couple posts back because you proved what I have been trying to get across in many of my posts. The line about if you cannot afford at least a 3 series bmw you do not fit in in orange county and also the line about do you think all these girls getting implants, surgery, etc. are spending money on it to pick up some guy with a less than par job? Those ideas clearly point out the superficial nature of MOST of the people I have been encountering in OC. But I do thank you for re-affirming to me and to most of the people on here that see eye to eye with me, that the shallow, self-centered, poor priority life does seem to rule supreme in Orange County.

[A Proud American]

Originally Posted by dakicka

I certainly do not want to fill out a credit application or turn over my W2's when I meet someone new to make sure I "pass their criteria" and that I'm worthy enough of their company.

We both know that's a ridiculous portrayal of the situation.

There are roughly 17 million people from all walks of life in this metropolitan area. When you meet somebody new you generally want to find out if you have anything in common. i.e. line of work, success, background, etc. Or to see if they are just another LOSER (hint: most people fall into this latter category).

If you are even slightly successful you will seek out other successful people who share your values. You do not want to hang out with LOSERS who will drag you down and infect you with bad habits.

But I do thank you for re-affirming to me and to most of the people on here that see eye to eye with me, that the shallow, self-centered, poor priority life does seem to rule supreme in Orange County.

Oh yeah it's just terrible here. We're all miserable jerks with shallow, empty lives.

Clearly you're not happy in OC and have no desire to make this work... why don't you pack your things and take your lousy attitude up to L.A.? You'll fit right in with the libs up there and I'm sure it will work WONDERS for your awesome career (har har).

[califantastic]

Originally Posted by dakicka

Those ideas clearly point out the superficial nature of MOST of the people I have been encountering in OC. But I do thank you for re-affirming to me and to most of the people on here that see eye to eye with me, that the shallow, self-centered, poor priority life does seem to rule supreme in Orange County.

If that is how you feel why don't you leave?

[YLresident]

Originally Posted by dakicka

"So what do you do", "What kind of car do you drive" and other similar questions of that nature for a first few phrases of a conversation are a bit too forward in my opinion and generally with a wrongful objective.

Or, it could just be that us folks here in OC spend so much time at work and in our cars that that's just the first thing we think about when meeting someone new b/c that's basically all we get to do all week (work/drive) until relaxing on the weekend.

I'm always curious to see what people my age are doing at work--I'm not particularly financially successful myself (but I like my job, so it's worth it), but it's neat to hear about 20-somethings out there doing great things at work... and, spending so much time in my car, naturally I have a bit of an interest in what others drive--plus, I'm in the market for a new one in the next year or so, so I'm also doing a bit of research if I ask, too (in particular, gas mileage).

Unless they're a friend, I never ask what someone makes, though, unless I'm really interested in what they do (like it sounds exciting, fun, or uber-stressful)--but I'm not good with boundaries to begin with, though...

Honestly (IMO), questions about work and your car are actually really timid, safe questions because just about everyone works--and in OC, just about all of us drive, so you've automatically got 2 things in common: having a job and hating OC traffic. ^_^

[CLQ]

Originally Posted by A Proud American

I've been lurking on this forum for a while and one thing that stands out is the constant negativity by a minority of posters.

I have lived in SoCal all my life and it is by far one of the best places in the world to live, but it is NOT for everyone. Let's be frank for a moment and think about what that means:

* If you are too lazy to use your noggin when you interact with others (e.g. 80% + 30% = 100% ?), or to aggressively advance your career and realize your potential, you will not fit in here. It is a meritocracy.

* If you have a loser job and are afraid to tell girls what you do for a living, you will not get much action. Sorry but that's just the way it is. They didn't move to NB and install $5k of silicone in their bodies to snag a busboy or a ditch digger.

* If you can't afford a halfway decent name-brand imported vehicle (at least a BMW 3-series), people will quickly figure out that you do not belong here and will treat you accordingly.

* If you are a liberal moonbat and think capitalism sux and refuse to conform to societal norms, OC is not the place for you. OC residents have mostly "made it" and want to be around other successful people who are just like themselves.

* This is one of the most tolerant and diverse regions of the country but that doesn't mean you don't have to be aware of taboos. If you want an "anything goes" atmosphere move to San Francisco.

One final point:

If you were happier back in NY/NJ, GO BACK TO THE EAST COAST. Californians love where they live and don't want to drown in your negativity (or change their way of life to accommodate whiny newcomers).

/rant

Another jaded SoCal native who never lived elsewhere to give a fair assessment. I too am a SoCal native but have lived elsewhere in New Zealand and Hawaii for 10 years. It's the people that matter and the people you have to deal with and unfortunately, there aren't that many people worth dealing with in SoCal. Plus, everyone is busy stuck in traffic and being slaves to their jobs so noone has time for each other.

By reading this post, this is the exact reason why people should seriously think twice about moving here--the fakeness, the plastic store bought looks, the attitude, the unacceptance of others and the false sense of security from material things that don't matter after all is said and done. Without these things, they are nothing and lack substance. The priorities are backwards. It is a bizarre place like no other. The weather is not enough to live here when you have to deal with the people, overpriced homes, traffic, road rage, traffic just think how many hours you spend in traffic. It's pretty much 24/7 and driving is required to go anywhere...there is no one central location like Manhattan where everything is there. If the beaches are another reason, they are dirty and cold although it is still nice to be on the beach to end it on a positive note. If the attitudes changed, it would be a much more desirable place.

[YLresident]

Originally Posted by CLQ

Another jaded SoCal native who never lived elsewhere to give a fair assessment. I too am a SoCal native but have lived elsewhere in New Zealand and Hawaii for 10 years. It's the people that matter and the people you have to deal with and unfortunately, there aren't that many people worth dealing with in SoCal. Plus, everyone is busy stuck in traffic and being slaves to their jobs so noone has time for each other.

By reading this post, this is the exact reason why people should seriously think twice about moving here--the fakeness, the plastic store bought looks, the attitude, the unacceptance of others and the false sense of security from material things that don't matter after all is said and done. Without these things, they are nothing and lack substance. The priorities are backwards. It is a bizarre place like no other. The weather is not enough to live here when you have to deal with the people, overpriced homes, traffic, road rage, traffic just think how many hours you spend in traffic. It's pretty much 24/7 and driving is required to go anywhere...there is no one central location like Manhattan where everything is there. If the beaches are another reason, they are dirty and cold although it is still nice to be on the beach to end it on a positive note. If the attitudes changed, it would be a much more desirable place.

My attitude's just fine, and most, if not all, of my friends' attitudes are pretty darn good, too. We have sprinklings of nice things, but mostly 'cause we're gadget geeks, not 'cause we're trying to keep up with the Jones' (or in most of my friends' cases, the Nguyens ^_^). Not to mention that most of the few nice things my friends and I own were generally paid for by us--not our parents. Granted, I'm still a bit of a leech since I live at home rent-free, but most of my friends do contribute to their family's finances.

Not everyone in OC is plastic. You just have to be more picky with the people you choose to talk to here, I guess... but you can generally see the plastic coming from miles away--their uber-botoxed foreheads shine like mirrors and their fake boobies shake like maracas. When you see them coming, just look through them like they look through you, and then when you see me or my friends walking by, say hello--we'll be a welcome respite from the plastic.

I know there are a lot of willing victims of the Hollywood mentality in OC, but there are also a lot of us here who recognize the absurdity and wastefulness of that plastic existence and do what we can to instead be open-minded, tolerant, educated (but not hoity-toity), and friendly to those we meet in an effort to combat the plastic OC stereotype.

Traffic does suck here, though. I can't honestly say I don't rage on the road sometimes, but mostly I just yell in my car to blow off my steam--I don't retaliate with my vehicle. I prefer to stay in one piece in my car, thanks.