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hi -
my husband and i are relocating to the coast of oregon. we are so tired of the corporate world as we currently live in Greenville, SC. we are ready for a laid back, cool breeze atmoshpere. i am an artist, and he is a renovations specialist, and we have no children. we want to live in a small town where people smile at each other, and you feel safe when you walk around the towns. we will be flying out there within a few weeks, but, want to make sure we're making the right decision. please someone help us! we want to be around happy, friendly people! thanks!
Rigel
thanks for your input. financially, we're okay - although a well thought out budget will have to be in place. i'm just used to people in Greenville, SC being so "SNOTTY", and don't take well to people that are individualists. we just don't adhere to the mantra that if you have been married for 18 years, you SHOULD OF HAD CHILDREN!!...well, we didn't. we love our dogs as children. we are quiet, and pretty much keep to ourselves. i try to practice the 'do unto others' quote. i treat people the way i want to be treated, with respect. even if i don't agree with their opionions, i respect them. i just hope the people there think somewhat the same way. i am 39, and my husband is 44. we like different types of people regardless of age, religion, or how much they have or don't have as far as money is concerned. basically, i just hope to enjoy the region and find peace at the ocean. wish me luck. thanks for your reply. Rigel
...mid to late 80s thou..the best way i describe it is the show "northern exposure". a friend brought me to a party the first night i moved there--i was dressed up in heels/hose, etc. everyone there was wearing costumes (not near halloween)--i felt totally over dressed. THEN, found out these people were the ones who ran the town (major, head of newspaper, etc.). i was in my 20s so i did not appreciate it the way i do now!
i used to hike along the shore and thru the mountain walks, and only see slugs and salamanders...no people. it was really a slice of heaven--i want to move back and really hope that it has not become too crowded.
the local people here on the coast are not as friendly as they appear. Very 2-faced. I have been here 10 years, and I CANNOT wait to leave.
It is very unfortunate as I love the ocean and the small town FEEL, but when your neighbors feed you all this false info, and sit back and watch you try to figure things out, it is just plain inhumane. Way too much teenage gosip crap, spitefulness and just outright cruelty.
If you were BORN in Oregon, you will most likely be accepted on the coast, but if you "aint from here, you dont belong here" is the unspoken local code.
I hope a tsunami comes and cleans this coastline out.
thats my family, friends, and myself that you are hoping will die a horrible death there coastead. THAT is "spiteful and outright cruel" How could you wish such a thing on people? If thats the type of attitude and desires you are expressing to the people around your town, no wonder you are having issues w/making and keeping friends. It sounds from your posts (all negative, all within 24hrs) that you've had a recent squabble with neighbors.
My inlaws live in Florance, they havent lived there all their lives. Nor were they BORN in Oregon. BUT, they now own a delightful business there, are well set into the community with plenty of friends. They are so very happy there. Much of the time when we go there for dinner, theres other people from the community at the table as well. Its great.
Ive lived along the coast for just over 4 yrs now. And have met many wonderful people. Plenty of good friends now. Not flybynight type of "friends" that disappear when theres help needed, but those who roll up their sleeves and jump right in with you. And yes, many of these people were born and raised here. Whos parents were born and raised here as well. My family and I have had no problems making these wonderful friends.
your line about
"If you were BORN in Oregon, you will most likely be accepted on the coast, but if you "aint from here, you dont belong here" is the unspoken local code."
is utterly ridiculous. I think maybe you might find answers closer to the truth of why people aren't very nice/accepting of you if you look inward. Hopefully can figure this all out before you move somewhere else and start slandering those who live there.
good luck on your move.
Tiffany
4 years is still not very long, you will find out soon enough how things work here. The first 6-7 years here were great. I am/was active in the community, volunteering, involved with community events, helping others out. I loved it, but the past few years I have seen the true colors of people's opinions. I truely think it is a jealousy factor. I am young and considered a success for my age. I make twice the average pay for the area, bought a house just before the price boom. My equity doubled in less than 2 years.
My resentment towards the area has been growing and I have kept my opinions to myself, but at this point it has gone too far. If you had experienced just one incident that I have with the old locals you would have the same opinion. Trust me. ( and I have done NOTHING to bring it upon myself)
Sorry about the tsunami comment. But ask your family members if they really trust the tsunami warning system (besides Florence is kinda protected by the dunes). For such a serious issue to communities, why dont they spend money on getting it right instead of allowing the development of million dollar condo's 10 feet above sea level, and 100 feet from the storm wall. Its a joke. The communities are run by retired people that want things the way THEY want them. In Newport they forced out the mayor because he wanted a Home Deopt here (but they let a Walmart in). Hows that for selfish? Lets make the tourists park a ridiculous distance away to enjoy the beach, and make the streets so narrow that two vehicles can't pass each other. This town spent millions of a state grant installing these huge rounded curbs that force drivers into the other lane while making a turn, when it should have installed crosswalk signs for pedestrians to cross highway 101. Since the mis-spent grant money, 3 people have been hit by vehicles 2 blocks from my house. One was just hit at 30mph a few days ago. They did a tsunami test last year that failed miserbly, and still hasn't been resolved. Lets spend a million dollars in Lincoln City on landscaping a median on hwy 101 with non-native trees that all died within a few months. More wasted money.
So again, whatever. Its my experience that forced me to post a comment, not spite.
"if you aint from here, you dont belong here"...... the truth hurts. An Oregon politician wanted to have a quote on the borders that read, "Oregon is a great place to visit, but don't stay" I am serious. Look it up.
thats my family, friends, and myself that you are hoping will die a horrible death there coastead. THAT is "spiteful and outright cruel" How could you wish such a thing on people? If thats the type of attitude and desires you are expressing to the people around your town, no wonder you are having issues w/making and keeping friends. It sounds from your posts (all negative, all within 24hrs) that you've had a recent squabble with neighbors.
My inlaws live in Florance, they havent lived there all their lives. Nor were they BORN in Oregon. BUT, they now own a delightful business there, are well set into the community with plenty of friends. They are so very happy there. Much of the time when we go there for dinner, theres other people from the community at the table as well. Its great.
Ive lived along the coast for just over 4 yrs now. And have met many wonderful people. Plenty of good friends now. Not flybynight type of "friends" that disappear when theres help needed, but those who roll up their sleeves and jump right in with you. And yes, many of these people were born and raised here. Whos parents were born and raised here as well. My family and I have had no problems making these wonderful friends.
your line about
"If you were BORN in Oregon, you will most likely be accepted on the coast, but if you "aint from here, you dont belong here" is the unspoken local code."
is utterly ridiculous. I think maybe you might find answers closer to the truth of why people aren't very nice/accepting of you if you look inward. Hopefully can figure this all out before you move somewhere else and start slandering those who live there.
good luck on your move.
Tiffany
Tiffany,
Although the other poster's statement is harsh and I would never wish death on anyone... I moved from Virginia to the Oregon Coast last year and I am miserable here. Maybe your area of the coast is different, or you just have a different personality. I have made a few great friends here. I love them dearly, but I have also been snobbed so much by many more people. It really hurt my feelings. One of my friends even told me that i was talked about behind my back and that she felt like it happened to her also. Mainly, it was in relation to other moms at our children's activities. There IS a highschool-ish clicky thing. I try to join in and engage myself in conversations and they will all leave or turn and look at me funny and ignore me. My husband works out of state and is only home every 2-4 weekends and I find it very lonesome. He feels really bad for me. Our home is on the market so we can leave, but he market is so dry that it isn't selling.
Another thing... when I first came here, i thought, "Wow, it's so pretty, so quiet, so safe, old-fashioned" It reminded me of the little town in PA portrayed in "My Girl"...lol. I could picture my tween-age daughter and a friend walking from our(in town) home to the lovely ice cream parlor just about a block up the street with a friend and taking my little one out to see the boats and to dig in the sand at the beach.
Well, once I started talking to other people with children... no one lets their kids walk anywhere alone, not even a block... not 2 feet away from their side. They bawk at tourist parents at the campgrounds when the kids run through the parks, like, "Oh my God, how can they let their child off the leash" practically. I met several moms who are afraid to let their children ride a school bus to school, even in 4th or 5th grade. My child rode the bus. She has sinse Kindergarten. One mom said she wouldn't let her child walk to school alone if they lived across the street. all of this followed by how horrible the world is today... I was like, "hello, nothing ever happens here!" If anyone knows why people are scared of their own shadow around here then fill me in, but compared to places where I've lived and people aren't overprotective of their children, this place is like Pleasantville, or it could be if everyone was friendlier and less afraid to be nice to each oher and let the kids out to play.
Is it a combination of the media and generations of people who've never lived anywhere else?
Then, there's the weather! The beaches here are absolutely gorgeous... STUNNING! However, you can't really enjoy them unless you wanna put on your LL Bean parka and a ski cap. I have tried on the warmest of days, but I don't last 20 minutes out there. My kids start complaining also. Summer has been better than winter. There have been a few nice days where if you choose lake over ocean it is pleasant, but they are so few and far between. Winter was awful. If you like the cold rain and wind then it may seem great, but at one point when it was 4 weeks going without seeing the sun, I was miserable. Did I say I am from VA? We had 4 seasons. It gets very cold in winter there and you can see snow and ice, but you will always see the sun inat least a few days, even when it's cold. It also gets hot in summer, but the thunderstorms roll in on the hottest afternoons and break away the humidity and make for a nice cool evening. Spring and fall are phenominal. Spring is beautiful with freshly blooming flowers and blossoming trees and mild teperatures. In fall it slowly cools off from summer and there is the most beautiful display of foliage.
So anyway, I can't wait to get home, becasue to me this isn't it. However, it may be someone else's dream home.
coastead and kari0422, what coastal towns do you guys live in??
I lived in Newport for a bit and my husband was from Lincoln City - Larry is absolutely correct, people in Oregon are individuals. Hard truth, but it seems either you fit in or you don't. My in-laws REALLY fit in with the whole community (it seemed everyone was their best friend) but I never found my niche there. Oh well, Lincoln City was not for me, but Corvallis was, and I have a myriad of lifetime friends there. I love Oregon.
I think you will find friendly people and not so friendly people no matter where you go. I am proud to say that I am from Oregon, grew up on the coast and lived in Portland. I have lived in several other states as well. I think people from OR are very friendly. I used to think people from the northeast were very rude, not so, just the way they come across. I know, my sister is married to a guy from Philly.
Anyone that would wish a Tsunami would wipe out a whole coast line makes me think that maybe the problem is you.
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used 2 live in Florence...
