Voluntary Simplicity (Bend, Marion: middle-class, renting, big house)

[karlaking]

I would love to hear from people who are living a simple life by choice.

[DragonFly757]

I like this question. I have to answer...

I grew up on a farm as a young child. We were self-sustaining, not even reliant on electricity! We had wood cookstoves, kerosene lamps and candles, cattle and other barnyard animals, lots of crops and a huge garden. We had chickens (and eggs), fruit trees, honeybees, a well for water (even a hand pump). We did our own recycling and composting. We canned and jarred our plentiful bounty.

I completely rely on the grocery store, gas pumps, and all the non-eco-friendly things that have dictated my life thus far. I want SO badly to get back to basics.

I hope to have a cabin in the mountains with stores of food, a garden, livestock, fruit trees, etc. I want to get back to where I was as a child. Only...greener. Solar, geothermal, and wind power. Composting and recycling. You know...the very things I grew up with but using more eco-friendly techniques.

[karlsch]

Just remember, if you choose this life it will be voluntary for you but it won't be voluntary for your five year old.

[DragonFly757]

All the more reason to choose a simpler life. I have children and they have been exposed for many years to a "non-simple" lifestyle. Some could say that it's bad for them, while others say it is good. I want them to benefit from what I was able to grow up with...and then make their own choices as adults on how they live their lives.

[Bendite]

A simpler life is so relative - I don't think it has to mean living in the country, milking the cow and putting up preserves. I've read that many people looking for a simpler life are in their 20s and 30s and I think that's great. Commuting 3 hours a day and working 60 plus hours a week to maintain a huge house that you spend no time in just doesn't make much sense.

Four years ago, I was in my 20th year of working for a software company in Denver. I'd climbed the ladder, was paid well, and put in a lot of hours. When I took a vacation, the first week of it was taken up with "unwinding" and the last few days were spent worrying about what messes I'd face when I returned. My husband had similar stresses in his work. So, we have simplified our lives. We relocated to my home state because if we'd stayed in Denver, we would have not changed anything. We sold or donated much of our stuff before we left, only to find that when we got here, we didn't need most of what we'd brought with us. Our home is a reasonable size, eco-friendly, built on the theme of the book The Not So Big House. One of the greatest changes in our life is that we did environmental landscaping - no more lawn mowing! Plus, we're saving water and have lots of wonderful wildlife to watch. I now work from home, but fewer hours. My husband's commute is 10 miles RT, not the 40 he used to drive each day. We buy as locally as we can (which is easier in summer than in winter here). We don't go out and buy things just to go shopping, which we used to do. With more spare time, I can prepare meals with leftovers for lunch the next day, which cuts down on expensive eating out and is much healthier for us. Our life is better in many ways, and we didn't have to give everything up about our lifestyle to get there.

I'm glad I spent the years I did in the business world. I learned a lot, had a tremendous amount of fun, and appreciate so much more what life I have now.

[Kathleenh54]

The kind of lives you are describing sound wonderful but the reality of it probably wouldn't work for me personally. I can say that because we are retired and have scaled down quite a bit. We still have one teenager living at home and in school, having launched two others. My DH no longer has the long commute which has made a huge difference for us. While we had our kids at home, though, we wanted them to have a comfortable middle-class upbringing and worked to provide it.

It's not that they can't have a nice upbringing while living The Simple Life but we wanted them to be more worldly. They have had great educations, traveled and learned how to cope. They have been the 'regular' kids among the 'richer' kids, know the difference and are fine with that.

Now that we're done guiding our children into adulthood, I'm ready to slow down but not if it means no restaurants, shopping, movies or vacations.

All in all, I'd have to say, "To each, his own."

[silverfox]

Originally Posted by Bendite

A simpler life is so relative - I don't think it has to mean living in the country, milking the cow and putting up preserves. I've read that many people looking for a simpler life are in their 20s and 30s and I think that's great. Commuting 3 hours a day and working 60 plus hours a week to maintain a huge house that you spend no time in just doesn't make much sense.

Four years ago, I was in my 20th year of working for a software company in Denver. I'd climbed the ladder, was paid well, and put in a lot of hours. When I took a vacation, the first week of it was taken up with "unwinding" and the last few days were spent worrying about what messes I'd face when I returned. My husband had similar stresses in his work. So, we have simplified our lives. We relocated to my home state because if we'd stayed in Denver, we would have not changed anything. We sold or donated much of our stuff before we left, only to find that when we got here, we didn't need most of what we'd brought with us. Our home is a reasonable size, eco-friendly, built on the theme of the book The Not So Big House. One of the greatest changes in our life is that we did environmental landscaping - no more lawn mowing! Plus, we're saving water and have lots of wonderful wildlife to watch. I now work from home, but fewer hours. My husband's commute is 10 miles RT, not the 40 he used to drive each day. We buy as locally as we can (which is easier in summer than in winter here). We don't go out and buy things just to go shopping, which we used to do. With more spare time, I can prepare meals with leftovers for lunch the next day, which cuts down on expensive eating out and is much healthier for us. Our life is better in many ways, and we didn't have to give everything up about our lifestyle to get there.

I'm glad I spent the years I did in the business world. I learned a lot, had a tremendous amount of fun, and appreciate so much more what life I have now.

Bendite,

Your story sounds a lot like ours except we retired before we made the changes. Strange as it seems we spent some time looking in Bend last year considering it as a last home. A really lovely place, but after all our searching we ended up in Sequim Washington. We are from Seattle originally so were not to far from our old friends etc. Everybody has there own version of "Making Life Simpler" but your version and ours makes a lot of sense to me.
My wife now has taken up reading, and we both enjoy Hiking in the old growth forests and walking on the beaches etc. Love picking strawberries,raspberries,and blueberries. Make unscheduled day trips galore and truly enjoying our current lifestyle. Never had time before now and we are really letting our hair down and breathing more slowly. Wife just started a Combo Yoga, and stretching class and loves it. She is an excellent cook and now has time to relax and enjoy her gift to both of us.
We came here and rented a very nice place while we savor in designing our (hopefully) last home. First things first so we embarked on liquidating 90% of our belongings. Garage sales, Freebie adds in the local paper, Craigs list, and word of mouth along with donations to charity organizations and we have "DONE IT"
We have consolidated all of our finacials into a retirement mode and looking forward to all the simple trips and pleasures that this season will bring.
Most of our friends say they are jealous but happy for us at the same time.
We feel extremely blessed as we have been together since 1963 and still feel the same about each other. That is part of what makes it so easy to feel satisfied and content with where you are in your life.

Silverfox

[haggardhouseelf]

Originally Posted by Bendite

A simpler life is so relative - I don't think it has to mean living in the country, milking the cow and putting up preserves. I've read that many people looking for a simpler life are in their 20s and 30s and I think that's great. Commuting 3 hours a day and working 60 plus hours a week to maintain a huge house that you spend no time in just doesn't make much sense.

I agree! My husband and I are in our 30's and raising two awesome kids. We feel we have a pretty simple and wonderful life. We have a middle schooler and an almost 3rd grader.

We have always rented a small space to live as close to work and schools as possible as one way to simplify our lives and save money. Our current place is 1050 sq. ft. plus a small garage. We love it. We don't have to fix or update anything, utilities are much less expensive, and it's been much easier moving every few years for husbands job, and we generally walk or ride bikes to work and school. We have just begun looking to buy our first home. We are looking for something similar to what we are renting - nothing big, and nothing which would cost more than 30% of our monthly take-home pay. We believe you should never spend more than 30% of your after taxes income on housing.

We got rid of the TV years ago. That has been a HUGE relief.

We do not subscribe to newspapers or magazines or netflix or any sort of accounts which would bring more "junk" into the home and cost more money. You can check out magazines from the library and get free papers lots of places around town if you ever want them.

We only listen to the college radio stations or NPR. We read our news online.

We use the heck out of our public library for music, films, books, and the great free events they have.

We do a bunch of volunteer work as a family and individually. It is an awesome way to spend your time - helping others helps you get outside of yourself and appreciate the life you have more.

We climb trees, go for bike rides, go camping, go to the parks, climb hills, go hiking, collect rocks, attend free events put on by the city, etc. for fun. We try not to do anything that costs a lot of money. To us, saving money and being frugal is one of the best ways to live a simple life. The more you spend and the more you buy the more "things" and more "stuff" you clutter your life up with.

We cook most of our meals at home. My favorite cookbooks are Alice Waters "The Art of Simple Food" and a cookery book called "lost Recipes" by I believe her name is Marion Cunningham.

My husband and I have tried it several ways - both of us working, me working and him staying home, and him working and me staying home, and for our family we have figured out that things are best when he works to financially support us and I stay home to take care of everything else. We save money and life is more calm and stable this way. I've been a stay at home mom now for 8 years. We find this simplifies our life as a family - not as much eating out and not having to juggle two working parents schedules. Things are handled more efficiently and the kids always know who's home to take care of their needs - I am! This also has been great for our marriage as we have more time together to spend as a couple, and my husband feels like the King of the World (his world, anyway! ) For being able to provide so well for his happy family. Me staying home seems to have given him a huge boost not only for his career but for his own happiness. He loves taking care of his family. It's wonderful.

Sorry for going on about that!

There are other things we did to simplify when the kids were much younger... we did cloth diapers and I breastfed (even when I worked). We did not buy into any of those (what I call) baby paraphernalia traps. We didn't buy any of the "baby containers" like play pens or high chairs or slings or whatever. We felt that what's arms were made for. My kids were always held until they could walk for themselves, then we kept them within an arm's reach. They are great kids and very compassionate and loving, and I know it's partly because of all the physical holding and secure feeling they got from us when they were young. They are very confident and independent people now, and I believe it is partly due to the fact that they were never restrained or put in a "baby container" when they were developing early on. We encouraged them to explore, we just made sure to be there with them so that they were always safe.

I have written too much ... too long a post. Sorry!

[silverfox]

Originally Posted by haggardhouseelf

I agree! My husband and I are in our 30's and raising two awesome kids. We feel we have a pretty simple and wonderful life. We have a middle schooler and an almost 3rd grader.

We have always rented a small space to live as close to work and schools as possible as one way to simplify our lives and save money. Our current place is 1050 sq. ft. plus a small garage. We love it. We don't have to fix or update anything, utilities are much less expensive, and it's been much easier moving every few years for husbands job, and we generally walk or ride bikes to work and school. We have just begun looking to buy our first home. We are looking for something similar to what we are renting - nothing big, and nothing which would cost more than 30% of our monthly take-home pay. We believe you should never spend more than 30% of your after taxes income on housing.

We got rid of the TV years ago. That has been a HUGE relief.

We do not subscribe to newspapers or magazines or netflix or any sort of accounts which would bring more "junk" into the home and cost more money. You can check out magazines from the library and get free papers lots of places around town if you ever want them.

We only listen to the college radio stations or NPR. We read our news online.

We use the heck out of our public library for music, films, books, and the great free events they have.

We do a bunch of volunteer work as a family and individually. It is an awesome way to spend your time - helping others helps you get outside of yourself and appreciate the life you have more.

We climb trees, go for bike rides, go camping, go to the parks, climb hills, go hiking, collect rocks, attend free events put on by the city, etc. for fun. We try not to do anything that costs a lot of money. To us, saving money and being frugal is one of the best ways to live a simple life. The more you spend and the more you buy the more "things" and more "stuff" you clutter your life up with.

We cook most of our meals at home. My favorite cookbooks are Alice Waters "The Art of Simple Food" and a cookery book called "lost Recipes" by I believe her name is Marion Cunningham.

My husband and I have tried it several ways - both of us working, me working and him staying home, and him working and me staying home, and for our family we have figured out that things are best when he works to financially support us and I stay home to take care of everything else. We save money and life is more calm and stable this way. I've been a stay at home mom now for 8 years. We find this simplifies our life as a family - not as much eating out and not having to juggle two working parents schedules. Things are handled more efficiently and the kids always know who's home to take care of their needs - I am! This also has been great for our marriage as we have more time together to spend as a couple, and my husband feels like the King of the World (his world, anyway! ) For being able to provide so well for his happy family. Me staying home seems to have given him a huge boost not only for his career but for his own happiness. He loves taking care of his family. It's wonderful.

Sorry for going on about that!

There are other things we did to simplify when the kids were much younger... we did cloth diapers and I breastfed (even when I worked). We did not buy into any of those (what I call) baby paraphernalia traps. We didn't buy any of the "baby containers" like play pens or high chairs or slings or whatever. We felt that what's arms were made for. My kids were always held until they could walk for themselves, then we kept them within an arm's reach. They are great kids and very compassionate and loving, and I know it's partly because of all the physical holding and secure feeling they got from us when they were young. They are very confident and independent people now, and I believe it is partly due to the fact that they were never restrained or put in a "baby container" when they were developing early on. We encouraged them to explore, we just made sure to be there with them so that they were always safe.

I have written too much ... too long a post. Sorry!

I love to read such a nice post in such a crazy World.

Silverfox

[Wicked Felina]

Originally Posted by haggardhouseelf

...
...
We climb trees, go for bike rides, go camping, go to the parks, climb hills, go hiking, collect rocks, attend free events put on by the city, etc. for fun. We try not to do anything that costs a lot of money. To us, saving money and being frugal is one of the best ways to live a simple life. The more you spend and the more you buy the more "things" and more "stuff" you clutter your life up with.

We cook most of our meals at home. My favorite cookbooks are Alice Waters "The Art of Simple Food" and a cookery book called "lost Recipes" by I believe her name is Marion Cunningham.

My husband and I have tried it several ways - both of us working, me working and him staying home, and him working and me staying home, and for our family we have figured out that things are best when he works to financially support us and I stay home to take care of everything else. We save money and life is more calm and stable this way. I've been a stay at home mom now for 8 years. We find this simplifies our life as a family - not as much eating out and not having to juggle two working parents schedules. Things are handled more efficiently and the kids always know who's home to take care of their needs - I am! This also has been great for our marriage as we have more time together to spend as a couple, and my husband feels like the King of the World (his world, anyway! ) For being able to provide so well for his happy family. Me staying home seems to have given him a huge boost not only for his career but for his own happiness. He loves taking care of his family. It's wonderful.


I have written too much ... too long a post. Sorry!

Sounds like you've made some wonderful choices, and at a young age.

I must second that it was nice to read your post, and show that it is possible to lead a happy life without becoming engulfed in consumerism. It was a pleasure to read your post!