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Some were published in a Chicago Tribune article, "Accident Reports Hilarious," and some appeared in an Ann Landers column, "But, Officer, My Accident Did Happen This Way."
1. "Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have."
2. "To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian."
3. "My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle."
4. "When I saw I could not avoid the collision, I stepped on the gas and crashed into the
other car."
5. "I was driving my car out of the driveway in the usual manner, when it was struck by
the other car in the same manner it had been struck several times before."
6. "The pedestrian had no idea which direction to go, so I ran him over."
7. "The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve several times before I hit him."
8. "In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole."
9. "I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed
over the embankment."
10. "I had been shopping for plants and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection,
a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision."
11. "I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel."
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