Future Headline Banner? (free, commercial, property, temperature) - City-Data Forum

Norm Barnes · 03-12-2011, 05:50 AM

Farmers Needed!!! Today Fairfield Development Corporation located in Southern California announced the plans to demolish a Shopping Development occupying 42 acres to create a farm area to produce needed crops to supplement the US Food Supply. Announcement comes as producers of crops worldwide have faced catastrophe after catastrophe. The shopping center's attendance had slipped in recent decades and many of the shops had reported losses.

Norm Barnes · 03-12-2011, 06:02 AM

TV AD PULLED!!!! Today Trojan announced the pulling of what amounts to be essentially a Vibrator Commercial. This action was at the request of many civic groups who believed the Ad promoted promiscuity and were offensive and dangerous to the teen viewing population. It also announced the launch of their new campaign offering free condoms at the various high schools throughout the US in order to prevent disease.

Norm Barnes · 03-12-2011, 06:17 AM

CONDOM ADVERTISING!! Today Koss Condoms announced the National Committee approved promoting their candidate on condoms for the coming campaign. Challenged as to how tasteless this was Koss announced that it will come in three flavors and certainly appeal to most consumers. Koss also announced that the winning candidate will have a 2 - 4 year free supply while they serve the public.

Norm Barnes · 03-12-2011, 10:17 AM

SEX CAUSES CANCER!!!! Research at Kinsey's today has determined that sex at too early an age causes cancer. It also causes an increase in children out of wedlock, loss of esteem, discontinuing education, alienating your parents, increasing your chances of becoming a guess on the Jerry Springer Show, or having your DNA tested on the Maury Show. There is a pill in development that will help by shrinking everything on your body, have an urge to wear more clothes, and to think like an adult. More information can be obtained from the company's paid program appearing on Direct TV on Chanel 2081.

Norm Barnes · 03-13-2011, 05:16 AM

OIL HARVESTING INCREASES CHANCE OF EARTHQUAKES!!!!!! Today noted scientists in the realm of geological studies concluded that the earth's core cooled by the Oil stored in its various cavities may actually be at risk by its removal. They Hypothesized that the earths floor lying beneath the Oceans can become super heated and explode similar to wet concrete when exposed to excessive heat. The combination of the earth's rising temperature, artic defrost and the removal of this oil coolant can give rise to earthquakes

sun queen · 03-13-2011, 08:04 AM

I think farming is a good idea

AksarbeN · 03-13-2011, 11:24 AM

The UFOs that had landed near populated areas of the nation last week have left without any harm to humans or property. It has been reported that several aliens had been in communications with humans and asked questions. No humans were injured in this exchange of information. It was determined that the aliens were leaving earth after finding out that there was no hope in helping mankind, humans were beyond help and out of control according to their higher intellect and abilities.

Meanwhile the wars, poverty, religious and political unrest around the world continue as usual with no evidences
of change taking place.

paladinking · 03-13-2011, 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AksarbeN

The UFOs that had landed near populated areas of the nation last week have left without any harm to humans or property. It has been reported that several aliens had been in communications with humans and asked questions. No humans were injured in this exchange of information. It was determined that the aliens were leaving earth after finding out that there was no hope in helping mankind, humans were beyond help and out of control according to their higher intellect and abilities.

Meanwhile the wars, poverty, religious and political unrest around the world continue as usual with no evidences
of change taking place.

stillkit · 03-13-2011, 08:24 PM

NO FOOTBALL THIS SEASON: GOP breaks players union.

SATX56 · 03-14-2011, 04:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AksarbeN

The UFOs that had landed near populated areas of the nation last week have left without any harm to humans or property. It has been reported that several aliens had been in communications with humans and asked questions. No humans were injured in this exchange of information. It was determined that the aliens were leaving earth after finding out that there was no hope in helping mankind, humans were beyond help and out of control according to their higher intellect and abilities.

Meanwhile the wars, poverty, religious and political unrest around the world continue as usual with no evidences
of change taking place.

Quote:

Originally Posted by stillkit

NO FOOTBALL THIS SEASON: GOP breaks players union.