Does Your Mother-in-Law like you? (homemade, names, married, birthday)

[115db]

My first in-law and I got a long great. She always had great advice. Heck, I still have a couple of things she gave me 30years ago...and can still wear them! My last mom-in-law, though, hates everyone. EVERYONE. But then, no one likes her either. My ex father in law, though, is a great person and we still talk and laugh from time to time.

[Blueberry]

Neither of my parental in-laws particularly like me. Sadly, they both have something of an inferiority complex, so they have a compulsive need to feel superior, and they've always tooted their own horns. They carry an air that lets others know they will never quite measure up, not even their own sons.

I've never quite figured out their issues with me, personally. Perhaps they didn't like that I'd been kept secret for a couple of years. (I know they had wanted their son to marry his former girlfriend.) They rolled their eyes upon learning that I hadn't grown up doing all the outdoors activities their family enjoyed. I've never measured up in this area no matter how much camping, fishing, backpacking, shooting, or other stuff I've since learned to enjoy.

Philosophical differences have played a huge role, too. My in-laws have lived lives of missed opportunities and broken dreams because they find excuses for not doing the things they've always wanted to do. They've grossly exaggerated their financial struggles, scrimping and saving for each little thing they get and passing up many others they can easily afford. Although his family was very well off, Dh actually thought he grew up poor. Somehow, he never quite realized that people with real swimming pools in the backyard are not poor! In contrast, dh and I have tried to follow our dreams although we are financially less well situated. When dh and I honeymooned in Alaska, his parents were jealous that we were going to Alaska before them. That was compounded when we actually moved here.

My m-i-l's biggest issue with me, though, is I probably remind her too much of her own sister and mother whom she dislikes. I went to college--like her sister, and trained to be a teacher--also like sis. I like being a girly girl--like both mom & sis. My personality is bubbly like the dreaded family's, and--shudder--I actually enjoy my time with the extended family and they like me, too. I think I committed the biggest sin, however, by giving birth to a girl and having a single child--both just like the sister. Plus, I tremendously enjoy that child and consider her a blessing rather than a burden!!! She's turned into a girly girl, too!

[Miss Blue]

My mil, God bless her, loved me, but of course loved her son best, and believed the terrible things he told her about me to justify his affair while we were still married..She was a devout christian so never said anything mean to me..Was kind to me, and prayed for my soul because she thought maybe I was going to hell when I left the famiily church..She did know that she could depend on me to sacrifice for her son and her grandchildren whom she loved very much..We all miss her..

[kaykay]

I think my MIL grew to like me, love me quite well. I don't think I initially fulfilled all her expectations/preferences but I think over the years, she came to appreciate the things I do have to offer if that makes any sense.

She will be 88 tomorrow. Regretably, she has what is called vascular dementia now. (Dementia resulting from a series of TIA's or "little strokes.") It's not like her mind is totally gone, but she has such trouble remembering anything for more than just a couple of minutes, etc. I wish she were still as she was mentally.

[breeze823]

Yes, she likes me because if it wasn't for me, my husband wouldn't have anything to do with her.
It's sad that their relationship is that way. I sure hope and pray that I have great relationships with my children and their spouses when they marry!

[ShinyHappyLucy]

My mother-in-law likes me, and I like her. Thankfully I've been blessed with a great one.

Lucy

[nnyl]

I like my mil, and I think she likes me. My only problem with her is that we are the blue collar folks of the family (she is too if you get to the bottom of it, but I think she wishes her life would've taken a different role). Her other two kids are college educated and so are their kids. Their kids are the favored. My kids, not so much. Maybe because we aren't college educated, world travelers like the others.

I have two daughters. One of whom hasn't done a whole lot with her life. The other has, tried to better herself. There is always comparison though with the other (grandaughter, the only other grandaughter, outside of mine). That grand daughter (from dh's sister), is college educated, moves in the upper echelant of society, only the best for her. First class airlines, 5 star restaurants and hotels, etc. Mil even says *oh I live vicariously through ______________".

Don't care so much for that individual. I think she is stuffy and pretentious and not very salt of the earth. But mil thinks she hung the moon and talks, drones on endlessly about that g'daughter's travels and latest doings.

It gets old.

[miguel's mom]

That is such a long story...

My MIL doesn't like me and I came to hate her over the years. As hard as it sounds but she's just an awful, selfcentered and dumb person.

I met hubby when I was 15 so I was very young. He was already 19 so his mother was in a kind of shock with the "illegal" thing etc.
Now I'm 26 and we've been married for four years, have our own home and a son who's already 14 months. Everything could be so perfect.

But my MIL is very jealous. I guess she cannot even be happy for her own son. I believe it's not just me, he could have married any other girl and she would be as stupid and misbehaving as she does it with me.

Over the years it got worse and worse and I think it's because I don't do everything she wants to just to please her. She has such bad manners like stopping you in mid sentence when you're talking to somebody else. She doesn't give advice but demands you to do things. I grew to really hate it when our son was born.

She expects that we do things for her, like watering the plants in the house and all her garden when they are on their yearly 3-week summer holiday and they never do anything for us. Well, I'm glad I don't depend on anything from them but it's sad for DH.
She's very spoiled and her DH, who is also an awful person, says what she has to do. If he's hungry she has to cook etc. But if she's unhappy why show it and whine about it and why make other people's lifes hard?

My SIL, well, I might say, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. So I married into a very nice family.

My MIL doesn't work anymore and I was a stay at home mom for a year after our son was born. She would have had enough time to pick him up and take him for a walk or to visit us and play with him. She never showed up, never. But she's jealous, when one of my aunts, or cousins or my grandmother goes for a walk with him. She pretends she wants to have DS around but hasn't got the nerves and is never in the mood to take care of him. And then she whines to DH how bad we are, how neglected she feels, how all of my family come first and they on the last place etc.

I could go on and on for hours. About a year ago I stopped worrying. At the beginning I took that really hard. I've such a big family on my mother's side, I have so many friends, many very good friends and I know so darn many peolpe (b/c DH plays soccer and I have a step aerobic group etc) but no one ever made me feel so down and hurt like she could. I'm glad I'm over that now. I can tell her to her face what's bothering me. And I don't care what she's babbling so if we have to talk it's mostly short and that's it.

Poor hubby, I wish he would have better parents, parents who would love their children because they just are.

[tet tea]

I couldn't tell you if my MIL liked me or not and quite frankly I don't care. She's pulled some stunts and said some things to family, friends etc which have left people with a bad taste in their mouth and just plain uncomfortable. It was once put to me that people avoid her or tolerate her.

[Denise in Fla]

My first MIL was a peach and we got along great. I am now divorced from her son and we still have a good relationship. Married now, but hubby mother died before i met him and if she is anything like his family I am sure I would of liked her.