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Old 04-13-2011, 04:22 PM
 
Location: Finally made it to Florida and lovin' every minute!
22,677 posts, read 11,463,642 times
Reputation: 17411

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I just got off the phone with this man. He admitted that he's been driving and has even gone as far as Walmart, which is about 5 miles from here and on a fairly busy highway. Something tells me the cops are going to get an anonymous phone call about this man because he has no qualms about what he's doing.

 
Old 04-13-2011, 06:52 PM
 
Location: Looking over your shoulder
24,312 posts, read 16,380,524 times
Reputation: 57513
Quote:
Originally Posted by nomoresnow View Post
We have a neighbor who recently lost his wife and, after having turned in his drivers license at the age of 80, has decided that he can now drive, even tho he has very little use of his legs (he's disabled) and admitted to me that his reflexes are so bad that he'll probably never be able to get his license back. This man has demonstrated time and again that he has absolutely no grasp on reality.
Quote:
Originally Posted by nomoresnow View Post
I just got off the phone with this man. He admitted that he's been driving and has even gone as far as Walmart, which is about 5 miles from here and on a fairly busy highway. Something tells me the cops are going to get an anonymous phone call about this man because he has no qualms about what he's doing.
driving without a license can be a sizable fine. Maybe an officer could simply stop by his home and have a talk with him first! It might save him not just an accident but also some money that we all don't want to give away in fines. I only hope no one is killed or injured before someone can stop him.
 
Old 04-13-2011, 07:48 PM
 
Location: Finally made it to Florida and lovin' every minute!
22,677 posts, read 11,463,642 times
Reputation: 17411
That's what we're all afraid of - someone getting hurt or killed.
 
Old 04-13-2011, 08:34 PM
 
6,046 posts, read 6,281,298 times
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You know what I hate? The term "at fault accident."

I caused a crash when I was 16 so they called it an "at fault accident."

But it's not like I wanted to cause the crash. I don't think anyone wants to cause a crash. But accidents happen.

The term "at fault" bothers me because it implies the driver wanted to cause the crash.
 
Old 04-13-2011, 08:48 PM
 
Location: Traveling again
2,535 posts, read 1,166,128 times
Reputation: 6051
This just happened today but stemmed from another incident that happened a few days ago. I decided to vent it out here and leave it right here from this day on.

I have crossed paths with someone who just suddenly, for no reason obvious to me, has it out for me. It's simple child's play but the thing is, I am far from childhood. Instead of sharing with me the reason, this person chooses to be the cowering coward and "slight" things I do. Yet when I confronted the person they claimed "everything is fine".

So, I have decided to keep looking up (hence my username) but not to look down on them. I've always believed that what you intend for someone else better be something that you yourself could handle. Because what goes around...comes back around. I forgive them because that's who I am.
 
Old 04-13-2011, 08:51 PM
 
Location: Looking over your shoulder
24,312 posts, read 16,380,524 times
Reputation: 57513
Quote:
Originally Posted by city_data91 View Post
You know what I hate? The term "at fault accident."

I caused a crash when I was 16 so they called it an "at fault accident."

But it's not like I wanted to cause the crash. I don't think anyone wants to cause a crash. But accidents happen.

The term "at fault" bothers me because it implies the driver wanted to cause the crash.
That is so true!
 
Old 04-13-2011, 08:59 PM
 
Location: In a happy place
3,198 posts, read 3,481,502 times
Reputation: 6176
Quote:
Originally Posted by city_data91 View Post
You know what I hate? The term "at fault accident."

I caused a crash when I was 16 so they called it an "at fault accident."

But it's not like I wanted to cause the crash. I don't think anyone wants to cause a crash. But accidents happen.

The term "at fault" bothers me because it implies the driver wanted to cause the crash.
That just means that something you did was responsible for causing the accident, thus it was your fault (as opposed to being someone else's fault) . True, it was an accident, but it was one that was your fault. If you intended to do it, then it would have been intentional and not an accident at all.
 
Old 04-13-2011, 10:15 PM
 
Location: Midwest
5,100 posts, read 3,295,172 times
Reputation: 10459
Quote:
Originally Posted by nomoresnow View Post
We have a neighbor who recently lost his wife and, after having turned in his drivers license at the age of 80, has decided that he can now drive, even tho he has very little use of his legs (he's disabled) and admitted to me that his reflexes are so bad that he'll probably never be able to get his license back. This man has demonstrated time and again that he has absolutely no grasp on reality.
Does he have any children or other family you could contact about him driving again? I would do that before calling the cops on him. He needs help, he doesn't need a 150 dollar ticket. Can you ask him why he needs to be driving now, when he has admitted he really isn't capable of doing so? Could it be he has no one to get groceries and such things? If that's the case maybe you and surrounding neighbors can help the old guy. People used to try and help their elderly neighbors. I don't want to see him get into an accident but I also think the situation would be handled better without the cops involved. He recently lost his wife, and he was probably with her 50 years or something, how would you feel? That might bend even a more stable person. Try and help him not make life more complicated for him.
 
Old 04-14-2011, 08:08 AM
 
Location: Finally made it to Florida and lovin' every minute!
22,677 posts, read 11,463,642 times
Reputation: 17411
Todd, thanks for commenting. There's a lot more going on than my posts have indicated, unfortunately. DH and I have been helping this guy out for quite a while, now, both before and since his wife passed away. We've been taking him on his errands at least once a week; there's a local organization that drives him to medical appointments (they don't do groceries); DH helps him with repairs, etc.; I made his plane reservations for his upcoming trip north for his wife's memorial. He is a very hard headed person who is intent on proving to others (and himself) that he can do it on his own. He refuses to involve his children. I wish I could say this in a kinder manner, but he is a very obnoxious and rude person unless you know how to deal with him. He has burned so many bridges in this community that very few people will offer to help OR he just plain doesn't like them, so he won't ask them for help.

The night his wife passed, DH and I were the ones there for him. We took him to hospice in the middle of the night, stayed there for him in case he needed anything, and I was the one holding his wife's hand when she passed away. They'd been married for 61 years and she did everything for him, including putting on his socks in the morning.

So I think we've covered those bases. There comes a point when, as hard as you try, someone will not accept your help or listen to you when you offer. We have tried involving his sons in the past to no avail. I am considering calling one of the sons, but am not sure how to approach them. As far as a ticket, I'm not sure that the police would do so without witnessing his driving.

I really don't want to hijack this thread, but I felt I needed to explain that it's not the simple situation that it appears to be. There's a lot more going on here than I've explained, even in this overly long post.

Now....on to our regularly scheduled thread.

 
Old 04-14-2011, 11:18 AM
 
Location: Looking over your shoulder
24,312 posts, read 16,380,524 times
Reputation: 57513
^^^ What you are doing is wonderful, keep up the good work. Itís always difficult to get everything into a post but personally I understand the work youíre going through helping your neighbor. Mrs Aks & I have adopted a single mother w/ 3 kids and help in different ways to make their lives a little better. Follow your good thoughts and keep moving forward with what you know has to be done, itís the right thing to do.
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