My selfish Aunt-claiming to be a Christian-

[EarthBound?]

Last year my Mother past away in October. It seem to me that the one who did all the BooHooing the most were the same ones who did the least. I'm glad that I had a really good relationship with Mom, all the my life, evan to the last days of her time on this earth. I have many sister's who live out of state and when ever they would come home they would spend very little time with her. I do remember that on her death bed a few of them were praying their little hearts out for her to live. To me that seemed to be a lot selfish . Our Mother had suffered long enough and now it was time for her to be with Pop. I love my Mother verymuch and I miss immensely but I'd rather not see this once strong Woman in the painful state that she was in. For us to try and barter with God to save a loved one or to extend their life is highly selfish. He isn't taking a life, he is welcomeing them home. And, for those who only see their loved ones when its to late or try to make amends with them while they're on their death beds. I only have this to say. It may be too late Baby. They needed you when they were alive and healthy. NOT IN THE END. And, what you sew you will reap. In your last days your loved ones will probibly do the samething to you. Because, you are the one who taught them how to treat others.
If you ever need a great book to help you or a freind though the passing of a loved one or a personal tragedy, I suggest (Why do Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner). When I got hurt back a few years ago my BEST HALF (and I mean it) found this book for me. Once I started reading it I couldn't put it down. Enjoy

[jco]

I will never forget her selfish behavior.

Well, I'm going to be honest and hope that you take it the right way. Unforgiveness is just as hypocritical as selfishness. My mother-in-law is the thorn in my side, but I realized after couple years that I am just as bad as her for not forgiving her for things. Some witness I am if I go about complaining about her!

I try now to forgive as things come up... right at that moment. I have learned that the hardest part is giving up my right to harbor bitterness, find fault, and victimize myself. But, the Christian life is about discipline, and we must give up our rights as Christ gave up His.

So, while I fully empathize with your situation, I do have to point out that her behavior is outside of your control, but your response is completely within your own control.

[dreamofmonterey]

JCO- okay. No argument. But my mother always told me treat others as you would be treated- do unto others....etc....plus- this woman is 30 years my senior. Such a great example for her grandchildren. I mean. please. I am all for Christian tolerance but not when someone is outright vindictive.


sunny

[EarthBound?]

Anger is probably one of the largest waste of human emotion and energy. Look at it this way. Many years down the road a person that holds a grudge against another is only hurting their self. Because the person that your angry at will probably forget what you are mad at them for, and not care about it either. So, as my wife is always telling me (kill them with kindness).
There is a wonderful movie that came out a few years back, I think it was called The Short Story. Its about a man that was well up in years, who rode a riding lawn mower over a hundred miles (he lost his license) to see his brother that stopped talking to him over something that happened years before. The problem was that neither one of them could remember what the fight was over.
I've gotten to the point were I don't hate people if they anger me bad enough ,I just nothing them. I guess what I am saying is that you don't hate then, you don't despise them and you don't talk about them, you just nothing them.
When you let people get to you like that, it can eat at you like a cancer. Literally, it will make you physically and emotionally ill. So, just NOTHING THEM.