What purpose does a funeral serve? (wedding, children, baby, open)

[smilinpretty]

I, too, want to be cremated, no service and my ashes be scattered in the Pacific Ocean. My husband ashes will be secretly buried next to his parents graves.

Personally, I find the whole morturary business a scam, taking advantage of grieving loved ones. The only money they will be making on us is on the cremation and btw since more and more people are opting for cremation, the rates go up yearly.

[BlueWillowPlate]

Originally Posted by Miss Blue

Both of my parents donated their bodies to science...

Mine too. We got a nice note from some place in Brooklyn telling us that my dad's corneas were helping some 72 year old man get his sight back.

[AksarbeN]

Originally Posted by smilinpretty

I, too, want to be cremated, no service and my ashes be scattered in the Pacific Ocean. My husband ashes will be secretly buried next to his parents graves.

Personally, I find the whole morturary business a scam, taking advantage of grieving loved ones. The only money they will be making on us is on the cremation and btw since more and more people are opting for cremation, the rates go up yearly.

That's a good idea ~ secretly buried next to his parents graves. What others don't know won't hurt them. Asking permission isn't always the best thing to do in some cases.

[jc76]

My Mom just died May 9th so I think I can feel safe commenting here.

She was 60. 14 year battle with Breast Cancer. She was an RN and known in our community as a saint, though she denied that title. She did alot of good for strangers as well. So my Moms funeral was full of tons of people telling us how wonderful she was, how much of an inspiration she was. We found out all the poor people she fed, they thanked us. So for us it was a wonderful experience to meet all these people whos lives were touched by our mother. It was in no way a "sense of closure", that's BS in my opinion.
There really is no "closure" at a funeral, at least there wasn't for me. There was a sense of positivity in a time of sorrow. There were people taking time out of their lives to pay final respects to our Mom.
So to answer your question...... there is no answer to your question. The deceased need to be laid to rest and this is the way it is done. It's usually just a final farewell/tribute to someone who you will never see again.
The "closure" issue never sat right with me, this is the woman who gave me life, nurtured me, led me on the right path, held me up when I was down, gave me a hug when I was losing my mind, fed me when I was broke etc etc. She has been my support system for 32 years and now she is gone....if anyone in their right mind can say a 2 hour service brings "closure" they are on crack.
Sorry to go on and on about it but this, for me anyways, all ties into what a funeral is and isn't.

[jc76]

Originally Posted by smilinpretty

I, too, want to be cremated, no service and my ashes be scattered in the Pacific Ocean. My husband ashes will be secretly buried next to his parents graves.

Personally, I find the whole morturary business a scam, taking advantage of grieving loved ones. The only money they will be making on us is on the cremation and btw since more and more people are opting for cremation, the rates go up yearly.

My Mom had her ashes put into a box and they dug down to my grandpa (her dad) vault and placed her box on top of it. That was what she wanted. There are many options for those who want cremation.

[NCN]

It is about the only time family members ever see each other. Funerals are a celebration of the life the person who died. Each person preaches his or her own funeral. The funerals are as diverse as the people they are for. I have been to a lot of them because I have a big family.

[AksarbeN]

Seems like it also brings out the worst in some family members or friends of the family that want to start an argument over something that happened X-many years ago and is unimportant at this time. Yet they go at it again.

[gavinzmick]

Originally Posted by BlueWillowPlate

A funeral provides a focus for the survivors to celebrate the deceased's life, observe his passing, and grieve his absence.

Thanks,
Mick

[jc76]

Originally Posted by AksarbeN

Seems like it also brings out the worst in some family members or friends of the family that want to start an argument over something that happened X-many years ago and is unimportant at this time. Yet they go at it again.

Never happened at any of our funerals. Remember the scene in Pet Semetary? If families actually fight at funerals that is just flat out sad.

[kaykay]

Originally Posted by NCN

Funerals are a celebration of the life the person who died.

This is how I also view a funeral or memorial service. It is a celebration of that person's life, a way of honoring them.

Condolences, JC, on the recent loss of your mother.