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Old 10-14-2009, 08:12 AM
 
Location: Where the sun likes to shine!!
20,549 posts, read 30,292,835 times
Reputation: 88950

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New Economic Lingo - the Crisis Special


1. CEO -- Chief Embezzlement Officer.


2. CFO -- Corporate Fraud Officer.


3. BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a
financial genius.


4. BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance the wife gets no
jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.


5. VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.


6. P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps
crashing.


7. BROKER -- What my broker has made me.


8. STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.


9. STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.


10. STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between
themselves.


11. FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.


12. MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.


13. CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.


14. YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.


15. WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per
share.


16. INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Last year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.


17. PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.
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Old 10-14-2009, 08:39 AM
 
Location: The #1 sunshine state, Arizona.
12,169 posts, read 17,595,085 times
Reputation: 64102
Broker LOL. That was cute. Thanks Lisa.
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Old 10-14-2009, 06:03 PM
 
Location: Covington County, Alabama
259,023 posts, read 90,260,774 times
Reputation: 138551
Sins of the times Lisa.
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:05 PM
 
Location: Abilene, Texas
8,746 posts, read 8,996,832 times
Reputation: 55906
Funny stuff....LOL. We've got to laugh at this economic mess sometimes or we'd do this all the time! -
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Old 10-14-2009, 07:16 PM
 
12,981 posts, read 14,488,579 times
Reputation: 19739
you should put this in the joke thread.
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