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Old 07-23-2010, 07:48 PM
 
Location: Canada
3,432 posts, read 3,275,665 times
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I've been thinking and I'm curious about something. I'd like to know how you very experienced moms feel about something.
Are you happier now that your kids have grown. Is your life more fulfilling?
Or were you happier when your kids were young?

Please try and be honest.

Last edited by KylieEve; 07-23-2010 at 07:49 PM.. Reason: .
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Old 07-23-2010, 07:54 PM
 
Location: N of citrus, S of decent corn
34,678 posts, read 42,823,353 times
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When my kids were little, I couldn't wait for them to grow up and give me some peace. Now, I long for those days when the little rug rats were monopolizing all my time and I was always exhausted. One of my fantasies is that I can bring my babies back, one by one, for a week at a time.
Do I feel fulfilled? Not really, because I did not tend to my own interests enough when the kids were little, so now that they are gone, I'm more directionless than fulfilled.
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Old 07-23-2010, 08:25 PM
 
28,006 posts, read 19,684,652 times
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Ooooh GREAT question, lisa! I'm interested in the answers as well.
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Old 07-23-2010, 08:26 PM
 
32,538 posts, read 29,377,870 times
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It's apples and oranges, I think. It also depends on how your child turns out. I know adult parents whose grown children are nothing but heartache. If you've managed to get them through the teen-age years, and they are contributing members of society it is very fulfilling. Different stages in life bring different kinds of happiness. And life will always be fulfilling if you are serving others and have a sense of purpose.

lisalan, just enjoy your little ones now. They will never be this size again and you can't take a 22 year old to see Santa. The years go by SO quickly.

p.s. I'm happy by nature. That makes a difference too.
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Old 07-23-2010, 08:46 PM
 
Location: NE Oklahoma
1,036 posts, read 2,581,900 times
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Does 17 count? I put a baby picture of my 17 yr old on the fridge. A really big one to remind me that at one time she was so cute and cuddly. Not the prickly ass I sent to her father's house last weekend.
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Old 07-23-2010, 09:59 PM
 
43,012 posts, read 89,100,171 times
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At this very moment in my life, I can honestly say that I was happier when mine were little.

It was definitely easier. They were so cute, innocent and happy. Their problems were simple.

Everything is so complicated when they get older. The teen years really wore me down---and my kids were good kids who treated me with respect.

When they are little, I could fix everything and make it all better. When they are older, I can't and shouldn't fix everything.

As a result, I can only feel their pain when they are struggling with a significant traumic life event.
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Old 07-23-2010, 10:44 PM
 
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I feel like the problems I have with the kids now are hard - how am I going to deal with their teenage years? FYI - they are 6 & 3.
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Old 07-23-2010, 10:56 PM
 
Location: Happy wherever I am - Florida now
3,359 posts, read 10,646,079 times
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I had a riot with my kids while they were growing up. They were cute, smart, and funny. I put endless energy into making sure they turned out well in every way. I taught them everything I knew, we traveled, had great adventures, and it was the best time of my life.

Now as adults I hardly see them as they live far away for work. Definately more fulfilling when they were at home.
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Old 07-23-2010, 11:25 PM
 
2,605 posts, read 3,942,116 times
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As our children grow, our joy in them changes. My oldest is 34. She's grown into a good mother, wife and all around good person. She works hard and takes care of her family at the same time. It's nice to see how they use what they learned from their parents, as adults.

When they are babies, you love them as babies. When they are grown, you love them as adults. It isn't whether they made you happier at one time more than the other.
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Old 07-24-2010, 01:45 AM
 
Location: California
29,633 posts, read 31,965,462 times
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Not at first. My youngest is now 19 and I was sad for the last several years knowing it was all coming to an end. I'm better now, anxious even. I can feel a sense of somthing like relief...I'm not there yet but soon. I think that's natures way.
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