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So what do you do in that situation? Do you show them bc methods and take them out to get them. Do you say OH HEEEELLL NOOO and lock them in a closet? Or do you just say "thats nice honey just clean up when you are done"?
Your children are NOT going to come home and share with you that they think they are ready for sex.
It's just NOT going to happen. I don't care how liberal a parent you are. Teens don't come home to discuss that stuff with their parents.
You provide an education well BEFORE they are interested in sex because you can't expect in a million years they'll come to talk about it.
Regardless, I gave you my answer.
I did with my mother actually...not all teens move as a monolithic block you know. I would be a big upset if my children didn't feel comfortable enough to talk with me about it.
You are right though i am forgetting most kids are not that open with their parents and should have worded the title different.
Also try to remember that your children are not little replicas of you.
Just because YOU went home to talk to your mother is no indication whatsoever that your children will do the same.
However 'cool' you plan to be, you should be aware that many children are shamed of parents who play the 'cool' parent.
They are embarrased that their parents WANT such an open relationship.
Strive for a relationship where your children feel comfortable talking to you about things, but do not expect that it will work out like that all the time.
I have actual experience. I have an 18 year old daughter, a 13 year old son and an 8 year old son.
Our daughter at the age of 17 was feeling pressured by her then boyfriend to have sex. She came to my husband to discuss her feelings. Now, granted, my DH and I are very conservative LDS (Mormons) and we teach our children abstinence until marriage (just like Mom and Dad )
So I felt very happy that she felt comfortable enough to talk with him about it and how she felt it was not right.
Shortly thereafter she broke up with him. He was very immature, into porn, and she did not agree with his views on life.
We started talking to her about sex from about age 12. These were heartfelt conversations in a loving manner from a parent to a child. We told her about us and our decision to wait. We told her how wonderful it feels to be together on your wedding night and not have the "magic" erased by premarital sex. We tell her how special it is to have only one partner, forever.
But that's just my experience. We are doing the same with our son.
IF my two sons came to me in the future telling me they want to have sex, I would gently remind them of our baptismal covenants and tie it into our religious beliefs. We don't just talk the talk..we walk the walk
Sex is not something to be done casually for a few hours of pleasure. Sex is a precious thing to be enjoyed by husband and wife.
That's what we teach and that's what my daughter believes.
Funny. I had the opposite experience. I came home one day and my mom said "I think you need to be on the pill". When I was 18 and had a boyfriend for a few months. I was a virgin at that point.
So what do you do in that situation? Do you show them bc methods and take them out to get them. Do you say OH HEEEELLL NOOO and lock them in a closet? Or do you just say "thats nice honey just clean up when you are done"?
Same thing I did for real when this happened -- I took them shopping for birth control. My daughter got the pill and condoms, and my son got condoms. Plus they both got a long talk about personal responsibility, the cost of having a child, and safe sex.
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