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Old 10-26-2010, 01:36 PM
 
324 posts, read 214,023 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post

There have been lots of good posts on this thread, not the least of which was CharlotteGal's:

And DewDropInn's was great too:


yes there were those two. I responded and thanked DewDropIn. I didn't respond to Charlotte's: thank you
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:36 PM
 
783 posts, read 1,249,412 times
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I didn't even MENTION scholarships or grants - although if she has a 29 on her ACT then she already liklely qualifies for at least one academic scholarship.

What I SAID was LOANS. It has little to do with your financial situation - and, once she's 21, your situation will matter even less. If she blows "your money" then she'll just have to borrow her own. Ce la vie - it's not like she's blowing her only chance at college.
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:36 PM
 
1,964 posts, read 2,665,902 times
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Mountain, I never said that nobody on here didn`t give any good advise. I was talking about the ones who THINK that their advise was good but is not. Especially in the tone that they presented it.
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:40 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
44,390 posts, read 54,990,299 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cl723 View Post
Mountain, I never said that nobody on here didn`t give any good advise. I was talking about the ones who THINK that their advise was good but is not. Especially in the tone that they presented it.
Actually, what you said that I responded to was this...

" A lot of really Good suggestions? are you kidding me...."

I contend there have been a lot of good suggestions on this thread
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:42 PM
 
1,964 posts, read 2,665,902 times
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I know what I said... There weren`t a lot. But I never said that every single person on here made a bad suggestion.
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:44 PM
 
324 posts, read 214,023 times
Reputation: 212
Quote:
Originally Posted by imcurious View Post
Have only read the first page . . . sorry if this is redundant, but are you kidding about "inpatient?" Wow. That is extreme. When is not doing well in school (due to stress or whatever) a cause for hospitalization? If this is your thinking, I shudder to think what else you have "taught" her. And sitting with a high schooler is insane. She needs SUPPORT. She is probably grieving the loss of her grandpa and who-knows-what-else. Get her some support and I don't think it would hurt you to also get some. She is a good kid, try to help her by offering her support.

Yes my Dad's passing is hurting her. But he recently died, not 2, 3, or 6 years ago when it was happening then. But is there any chance you missed her mother's issues and being told that she will go crazy by her mother. Any chance that her mother's abandonment having a role here? Because that is what she tells me and cries about. Any that my stating that his has gone on for 6 to 7 years get by you?

And why is helping her with her homework, WHEN SHE ASKED ME TO, INSANE??
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:46 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
44,390 posts, read 54,990,299 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cl723 View Post
I know what I said... There weren`t a lot. But I never said that every single person on here made a bad suggestion.
I didn't say you did
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:49 PM
 
324 posts, read 214,023 times
Reputation: 212
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains View Post
Agreed, and I've said it on an earlier post.

SadDad needs some individual help with his controlling nature and guidance on how to transition from being parent to mentor.

Hopefully he gets that now

how exactly am I controlling? Is it becasue I don't let her do whatever she wants whenever she wants with whomever she wants? She knew some boy that did street racing. Did I do the wrong thing by not letting her sit in the car whan they raced? Where is the line?
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:52 PM
 
324 posts, read 214,023 times
Reputation: 212
Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn View Post
Ding, ding, ding!

My best friend, who has a son who sounds VERY much like your daughter, just spent thousands and thousands of dollars putting him into the "right" college, setting up his dorm room, etc., etc., etc.,

He lasted one semester.

I am a HUGE believer in either a gap year (let them find themselves) or sending them to a community college until everybody knows that they can handle it.

If it's HER 18K that's one thing. If it's YOUR 18K your are allowed input into the matter. Absolutely.

Thank you. If she is ready and works for it she goes after HS. If not she goes to CC and workds until she is ready. Everyone is not ready at the same time. She needs to get through the lying and she needs to heal. That is why I came here. For some input on how to help her.
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Old 10-26-2010, 01:52 PM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
44,390 posts, read 54,990,299 times
Reputation: 37174
Quote:
Originally Posted by SadDad View Post
how exactly am I controlling? Is it becasue I don't let her do whatever she wants whenever she wants with whomever she wants? She knew some boy that did street racing. Did I do the wrong thing by not letting her sit in the car whan they raced? Where is the line?
I know it's hard for you to see, and I am sympathetic to how difficult this all is for you.

Would you like me to go back and quote all the different controlling things you have said? I will do it if that would really help you.
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