What would you do if you caught your teen having sex (method, teenagers)

[Sundance]

Originally Posted by raggy491

Just curious how others would react.

My co-worker told me today, that he caught his 16 year old daughter having sex with her boyfriend.

To make things worse, it was under his roof. He said her boyfriend was over and the bedroom door was closed. She was to leave the door open when he was there and didnt. Co-worker said when he opened the door There they were going at it right in front of him!! wow!! (dont know why they were stupid enough to close the door and think they could just go at it withought getting caught ). Boyfriend got kicked out and co-worker and Daughter got in a very big fight over her stunt.

I could tell he was stressed about it. He knew she was no angel, but to go that far as in the house WOW.

What would some of you do if this happened?

He lets his daughter's BF "visit" her in her BEDROOM and is then surprised when they close the door & go at it?
He must've forgotten what puberty was like.
The only place my teenage daughter will receive guests of the OPPOSITE gender is in the living room. If that isn't good enough, he can stay home.

[paganmama80]

Originally Posted by Sundance

He lets his daughter's BF "visit" her in her BEDROOM and is then surprised when they close the door & go at it?
He must've forgotten what puberty was like.
The only place my teenage daughter will receive guests of the OPPOSITE gender is in the living room. If that isn't good enough, he can stay home.

Access to a bedroom or not isn't going to stop a determined teen. But letting a bf in a bedroom with the door open is pretty common among parents.

[maciesmom]

Originally Posted by paganmama80

... But letting a bf in a bedroom with the door open is pretty common among parents.

Not in this house. No reason for friends of the opposite gender to be in bedrooms, regardless of the door being open or closed.

[NJGOAT]

Educate them all you can about the risks and responsibilities of sex all along in an age appropriate manner. Expect that it will happen and there isn't much you can do to stop it. You don't need to codone it happening in your home, but don't be so naive to believe that it won't or that it won't just happen somewhere else. Don't be so naive to believe that your children are somehow going to magically not do things that most of us did or tried to do at those same ages.

For the folks thinking their banning of such things will work, enjoy raising your grandkids, they should be here real soon.

[maciesmom]

Of course you should educate your kids and of course just because one discourages teens having sex under your roof will not keep them from having sex elsewhere...BUT....I can certainly set the standards for what is appropriate in my home. The OPs question was relative to teens having sex in the parent's home...(while they were there!) not that they thought the daughter was having sex (IIRC they already suspected/knew that was going on).

[paganmama80]

Originally Posted by maciesmom

Not in this house. No reason for friends of the opposite gender to be in bedrooms, regardless of the door being open or closed.

*shrugs* like i said it really doesn't matter, as the only thing it does is make the parent feel more in control is all.

[NJGOAT]

Also, wanted to add a good anecdote. My parents neighbor came home from work early, walked into his house and immediately screamed a very loud WTF!!! Came back outside and was pacing in his yard. About 30 seconds later a shirtless boy comes running out the door and down the street. He goes back inside and no one heard anything else for a day. This particular neighbor and my dad are friends, so we got the scoop.

Turns out the neighbors daughter was performing oral favors on her boyfriend who was seated in dad's easy chair. Neither of them expected dad to be home from work so early. He admitted he reacted badly and while a pretty liberal guy was just shocked to see it in front of him. He actually apologized to his daughter and the boyfriend for the way he reacted. They had a good talk about appropriate times and places, especially considering the daughter has a younger sister. The daughter and her boyfriend have now been together about 8 years and are planning on getting married soon.

[paganmama80]

Originally Posted by maciesmom

Of course you should educate your kids and of course just because one discourages teens having sex under your roof will not keep them from having sex elsewhere...BUT....I can certainly set the standards for what is appropriate in my home. The OPs question was relative to teens having sex in the parent's home...(while they were there!) not that they thought the daughter was having sex (IIRC they already suspected/knew that was going on).

No he used someone having sex in her parents house as an example, but the question is what would you do if you caught your teen having sex. In most cases you would catch them in the house.

[maciesmom]

Originally Posted by paganmama80

*shrugs* like i said it really doesn't matter, as the only thing it does is make the parent feel more in control is all.

I agree. But I also agree a parent should be in control of behavior going on in their home.

[paganmama80]

Originally Posted by njgoat

also, wanted to add a good anecdote. My parents neighbor came home from work early, walked into his house and immediately screamed a very loud wtf!!! Came back outside and was pacing in his yard. About 30 seconds later a shirtless boy comes running out the door and down the street. He goes back inside and no one heard anything else for a day. This particular neighbor and my dad are friends, so we got the scoop.

Turns out the neighbors daughter was performing oral favors on her boyfriend who was seated in dad's easy chair. Neither of them expected dad to be home from work so early. He admitted he reacted badly and while a pretty liberal guy was just shocked to see it in front of him. He actually apologized to his daughter and the boyfriend for the way he reacted. They had a good talk about appropriate times and places, especially considering the daughter has a younger sister. The daughter and her boyfriend have now been together about 8 years and are planning on getting married soon.

lol!