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Old 12-03-2010, 01:38 PM
 
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^^^ go! We've done it once or twice a year since ours were babies. Yes, you WILL miss them, but do it anyway. It's good for the marriage, and it is great for the grandparent-grandchild connection.

I always took my parents up on their offers to babysit for us, and my kids are much closer to their grandparents than their cousins are.
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Old 12-03-2010, 01:47 PM
 
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Pre-record a book, or nursery rhymes and let your mother play them for the baby. Also, put a shirt or something you've worn in the crib for baby to "smell" his mama and daddy! Have fun on your trip. Your mom will take good care of that baby!
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Old 12-03-2010, 02:06 PM
 
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Yep, I would go on the trip. I would not be worried at all about my baby if I left her with my mom. Baby was with your mom a lot before so there shouldn't be any problems. My mom is a little older so I would ask my sister to come over some to see if mom needed any help.
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Old 12-03-2010, 02:19 PM
 
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It is comforting for you to know the baby is in good hands w/ your mother. Are you taking along a laptop? If you don't have it, you can download Skype and phone your mom and have voice/video calls over the internet. This way your baby could see you and you see him/her. I keep in touch w/ my niece this way who is out of state. We can see eachother and it's almost like we're in the same room.
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Old 12-03-2010, 02:43 PM
 
3,644 posts, read 10,923,411 times
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I wouldn't do it. 9 days is a long time to be away from any child, much less a 5 MONTH old.

You and your GF will have to decide what your priorities are and act accordingly. What's more important to the two of you. Whatever you decide, it will probably be indicative of what you'll decide as your child grows and gets older.

DH has a cousin who has been with her bf to DisneyWorld 4 times in the past 7 years (her oldest is 7). They've never taken their sons. They take a "honeymoon" every year, just the two of them, during Spring Break. At first, it was to have 'time away'. Then it was that he wouldn't remember any of their vacations anyway. Then they had a second child. Then they wanted that child to be old enough to remember and didn't feel the extra expense for the kids was 'worth it'. My skin scrawled at the last family gathering when they were excusing this, as we were discussing our last trip to Disney and the next planned trip- WITH the kids. They mock us all the time about being with our kids "too much". She cavalierly stated that they'd take the boys 'someday' when the youngest was over 5.

Now, the reason they've been so often, despite their lack of income is that HER boss owns a timeshare near there and one of her 'benefits' is use of it once every other year. They use their EIC (ie tax welfare check) to buy the plane tickets and tickets to the park.

Her youngest just turned 4 in August. In September, she was diagnosed with MS. It's progressing quickly. No trip to Disney for the two of them this year, or any year after (she can no longer work). At least they'll have their memories.

Their children will have memories too of Disney, sans parents. Her parents are taking the boys next spring. They are discussing signing over guardianship of the boys over to them.

As I said, the little decisions you make indicate the ones you'll make as your children grow.
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Old 12-03-2010, 03:00 PM
 
345 posts, read 473,338 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GeorgeLucasLongLostChin View Post
What I wonder if the baby, at 5 months old, would suffer from separation anxiety or if he would not even care at all.

Would you do it?
Two things:

1) at 5 months you are likely to have more separation anxiety.

2) you need to plan a whole lot better. You gove a free one this time; next time you may not be so lucky.
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Old 12-03-2010, 03:05 PM
 
345 posts, read 473,338 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sskkc View Post
I wouldn't do it. 9 days is a long time to be away from any child, much less a 5 MONTH old.

You and your GF will have to decide what your priorities are and act accordingly. What's more important to the two of you. Whatever you decide, it will probably be indicative of what you'll decide as your child grows and gets older.

DH has a cousin who has been with her bf to DisneyWorld 4 times in the past 7 years (her oldest is 7). They've never taken their sons. They take a "honeymoon" every year, just the two of them, during Spring Break. At first, it was to have 'time away'. Then it was that he wouldn't remember any of their vacations anyway. Then they had a second child. Then they wanted that child to be old enough to remember and didn't feel the extra expense for the kids was 'worth it'. My skin scrawled at the last family gathering when they were excusing this, as we were discussing our last trip to Disney and the next planned trip- WITH the kids. They mock us all the time about being with our kids "too much". She cavalierly stated that they'd take the boys 'someday' when the youngest was over 5.

Now, the reason they've been so often, despite their lack of income is that HER boss owns a timeshare near there and one of her 'benefits' is use of it once every other year. They use their EIC (ie tax welfare check) to buy the plane tickets and tickets to the park.

Her youngest just turned 4 in August. In September, she was diagnosed with MS. It's progressing quickly. No trip to Disney for the two of them this year, or any year after (she can no longer work). At least they'll have their memories.

Their children will have memories too of Disney, sans parents. Her parents are taking the boys next spring. They are discussing signing over guardianship of the boys over to them.

As I said, the little decisions you make indicate the ones you'll make as your children grow.

I don't think this is nearly the case with the OP.

1) Their first choice was the Caribbean but chose Hawaii instead as they felt it was better for the child.

2) They were going to take the child to Hawaii in the first place but have thought better of it as their activities there aren't child friendly.

3) The whole deal sounds nonrefundable.

They are guilty of poor planning; they are a far cry from the unfortunate situation you described.

Last edited by SadDad; 12-03-2010 at 03:17 PM..
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Old 12-03-2010, 03:08 PM
 
Location: Geneva, IL
12,980 posts, read 14,535,563 times
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On the one hand it's pretty easy travelling with a 5 month-old. It's gets more complicated as they get older. On the other hand, you have this opportunity now, I say take advantage of it and enjoy yourselves. It gets harder and harder to spend good quality time with your partner with kids in the mix, take advantage of it. Spoil the GF, I'm sure she'll appreciate it.
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Old 12-03-2010, 03:10 PM
 
556 posts, read 797,005 times
Reputation: 859
Quote:
Originally Posted by sskkc View Post
I wouldn't do it. 9 days is a long time to be away from any child, much less a 5 MONTH old.

You and your GF will have to decide what your priorities are and act accordingly. What's more important to the two of you. Whatever you decide, it will probably be indicative of what you'll decide as your child grows and gets older.

DH has a cousin who has been with her bf to DisneyWorld 4 times in the past 7 years (her oldest is 7). They've never taken their sons. They take a "honeymoon" every year, just the two of them, during Spring Break. At first, it was to have 'time away'. Then it was that he wouldn't remember any of their vacations anyway. Then they had a second child. Then they wanted that child to be old enough to remember and didn't feel the extra expense for the kids was 'worth it'. My skin scrawled at the last family gathering when they were excusing this, as we were discussing our last trip to Disney and the next planned trip- WITH the kids. They mock us all the time about being with our kids "too much". She cavalierly stated that they'd take the boys 'someday' when the youngest was over 5.

Now, the reason they've been so often, despite their lack of income is that HER boss owns a timeshare near there and one of her 'benefits' is use of it once every other year. They use their EIC (ie tax welfare check) to buy the plane tickets and tickets to the park.

Her youngest just turned 4 in August. In September, she was diagnosed with MS. It's progressing quickly. No trip to Disney for the two of them this year, or any year after (she can no longer work). At least they'll have their memories.

Their children will have memories too of Disney, sans parents. Her parents are taking the boys next spring. They are discussing signing over guardianship of the boys over to them.

As I said, the little decisions you make indicate the ones you'll make as your children grow.

EIC is not "tax welfare". Your entire post just drips with anger and resentment and JUDGMENT.
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Old 12-03-2010, 03:32 PM
 
345 posts, read 473,338 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kel6604 View Post
EIC is not "tax welfare". Your entire post just drips with anger and resentment and JUDGMENT.
I think it has nothing to do with the OP so I would agree with the judgement remark.

But the anger is understandable (regarding the cousin-in-law). My DD, now 17, never got one single coloring book from her mom's family (I've had custody since she was 3). Yet they take the Uncle's kids on Disney Cruises each year. Do I expect anything from them? No, but I expect them to ackowledge their only granddaughter. That is what I'm angry about. Not for me, but the sadness of being ignored that my daughter feels.

I don't see any resentment either. The poster feels the cousin should do more with their kids rather then she do less with hers. I'd be pissed at the cousins t0o, not because I couldn't go - but because their kids are getting the shaft.
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