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Old 12-20-2010, 01:07 PM
 
Location: Australia
89 posts, read 180,537 times
Reputation: 59

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Hey
It only hit me this year that I'm a Gay Man. And I need your help on how to tell a family which is all in the Church.

I'm just wondering how to tell my family members that I am a Gay Catholic. My Family is very Catholic and some of my family members is in the Church. My Uncle is a Preist so that make it's harder.
Catholic I know it's againist the rules Ive need some advice from the million + memeber on city data.

What's your advice? If you were me then what will you tell them.
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Old 12-20-2010, 01:54 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,434 posts, read 41,620,437 times
Reputation: 46995
Are there any support groups in australia for gay catholics? There are here. Perhaps you could talk to somebody in the same position who could help you learn how to tell your family.

If no support groups for gay catholics I'm sure there are groups for parents of gays there. These are the people to talk to as they have had experience.
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Old 12-20-2010, 02:02 PM
 
Location: 3814′45″N 12237′53″W
4,152 posts, read 9,579,339 times
Reputation: 3398
Are you still wanting to remain in the the parish? I don't know that that is feasible but then again it depends on your parish.
Technically, we all know how the Catholic church feels about gays. Gays in the church are a particular conundrum for them, so I would prepare myself for being shunned from the parish and likely some of the family to some extent.
If that is something you can live with, then I would suggest finding an alternative church and coming out to your family. and see how the chips fall, as they say.

I've had a number of Catholic friends come out to their very Catholic families, with varying degrees of success, but all of them weren't interested in staying within the Catholic church since the dogma is exclusive and dowright hateful.
I agree with no kudzu about finding support in your area. It's hard for us in other countries to gauge the social outcome in your country.
good luck. I hope that it all works out well for you.
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Old 12-20-2010, 02:10 PM
 
2,490 posts, read 3,610,962 times
Reputation: 2865
What does coming out as a homosexual have anything to do with parenting?
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Old 12-20-2010, 02:20 PM
 
32,538 posts, read 29,325,866 times
Reputation: 32238
Harry, I'll go along with getting advice from someone who has "been there, done that" if at all possible.

BTW Don't be surprised if they tell you they already knew (or at least had a strong suspicion) that you were gay. They've known you all your life.

Stay strong.
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Old 12-20-2010, 02:43 PM
 
Location: NJ
2 posts, read 3,693 times
Reputation: 10
Dear Harry Potter 1,
You must try to view the following film and ideally show it to your family. It is an incredibly touching, heartfelt, eye-opening film:
In Good Conscience: Sister Jeannine Gramick's Journey of Faith

This film was made in the U.S. a few years ago. Sr Jeannine is remarkable in that she continues to 'fight city hall' as in The Vatican, on behalf of Gay Catholics. I saw the film with her in attendance as well as the filmmaker, Barbara Rick and a funder, Deborah Santana. Just powerful; highly recommended.
Be strong. But remember, if the Catholic Church turns its back on you, there are other wonderful Christian communities which will welcome you.
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Old 12-20-2010, 03:24 PM
 
729 posts, read 1,377,770 times
Reputation: 280
Quote:
Originally Posted by 90sman View Post
What does coming out as a homosexual have anything to do with parenting?
It has to do with how parents react to/deal with having a gay son.
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Old 12-20-2010, 06:38 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,434 posts, read 41,620,437 times
Reputation: 46995
This is a very important lesson in parenting. We, as parents, will no doubt have to learn things about our children we might not want to know. If we can learn how best to react and still keep communication open between child and family, we have learned alot.

And , like it or not, alot of us hear from our kids that they are gay. You might not want to hear that, but there are more gays in the world than we want to admit and they have to have parents too.
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Old 12-20-2010, 06:46 PM
 
Location: Denver area
21,137 posts, read 22,107,592 times
Reputation: 35503
I think I would be extremely sad if one of my children had "how to share who I am with my parents" as a challenge. I always hope and pray they know they are loved regardless.
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Old 12-20-2010, 10:03 PM
 
Location: Liberal Coast
4,271 posts, read 4,983,848 times
Reputation: 3861
I don't know what I would say, as I am not gay. However, if you are gay they probably do know. Most people know before that person comes out to them. As Catholics, my husband and I would still love our gay children. The Church doesn't hate gays. The Church says that being involved in homosexual intercourse is a mortal sin, just as pre-marital sex is.
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