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Old 12-28-2010, 07:26 PM
 
43,012 posts, read 89,076,504 times
Reputation: 30261

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Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn View Post
Now THAT is really interesting to me because I don't know ANY. I know a lot of families who can't afford it. Kids need to work to contribute to the household income.

For the families I've known who are tremendously well off, all I can think of are "trust fund babies" I've known. Read Mom and Dad have bucks and support their adult children. The children got handed everything, felt the world owed them happiness and squandered their lives.
It's pretty much the norm in my area to not charge adult children rent and to provide them with shelter and food at no cost. Well, it's the norm for the ones who aren't kicking their children out of the house. There doesn't seem to be a middle ground around here.

I personally don't know how a lot of families can't afford it. Afterall, they were providing housing and feeding their children for 18 years. Why would they suddenly not be able to afford to house and feed a child when he/she becomes an adult on his/her 18th birthday? They actually cost less after they turn 18 because they are rarely home to eat food or use the utilities anyway. LOL

Granted, I'm only talking about shelter and food. Adult children should pay for everything else. I know I'll never charge my children rent. The minute I start looking at them thinking they should be paying rent is the minute we will have a talk about them getting their own place.

 
Old 12-28-2010, 07:37 PM
 
6,777 posts, read 6,864,418 times
Reputation: 6942
Quote:
Originally Posted by paganmama80 View Post
Well i mean no not really...urine is completely sterile .
Urine is initially sterile, but once it interacts with the bacteria in the toilet it really isn't anymore. Also some urine will touch the skin around the genitals before reaching the toilet so that urine isn't sterile. Definitely flush before cleaning the toilet, that is my advice .
 
Old 12-28-2010, 07:42 PM
 
Location: maryland
3,967 posts, read 5,681,014 times
Reputation: 1711
Quote:
Originally Posted by detshen View Post
Urine is initially sterile, but once it interacts with the bacteria in the toilet it really isn't anymore. Also some urine will touch the skin around the genitals before reaching the toilet so that urine isn't sterile. Definitely flush before cleaning the toilet, that is my advice.

Oh hush you!
 
Old 12-28-2010, 07:44 PM
 
27,995 posts, read 19,677,561 times
Reputation: 16471
Quote:
Originally Posted by steelstress View Post
Nothing was said about other people's homes. Again, you just don't comprehend. Where are you pulling this out from?


Quote:
Originally Posted by slbailey617 View Post
Our 18 year old son still lives with us and we've made it very clear to him that we do not approve of him spending the night at his girlfriends house. She is also 18 and lives with her parents. Her parents have no objection and even let them sleep in the same bed. This makes my wife and I absolutely crazy because it goes against everything we were raised and the way we raised him. All we get is that "I'm 18 and you aren't allowed to tell me what to do." To which we've responded that come Jan 1st after the holidays, we're going to help him get his own apartment since he doesn't like the rules living here.

We don't want to kick him out but we also don't enjoy having our son thumb his nose in our face and say "I'll do what I want and you can't stop me."

Steve

Well....I just don't know where I could have pulled that from. Not at all. Just out of the clear blue sky I suppose.

Yes sirree.
 
Old 12-28-2010, 07:45 PM
 
27,995 posts, read 19,677,561 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steelstress View Post
You really need that to be explained to you?
It's quite obvious people have different definitions of what being an adult with rights means.
 
Old 12-28-2010, 07:46 PM
 
27,995 posts, read 19,677,561 times
Reputation: 16471
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
It's pretty much the norm in my area to not charge adult children rent and to provide them with shelter and food at no cost. Well, it's the norm for the ones who aren't kicking their children out of the house. There doesn't seem to be a middle ground around here.

I personally don't know how a lot of families can't afford it. Afterall, they were providing housing and feeding their children for 18 years. Why would they suddenly not be able to afford to house and feed a child when he/she becomes an adult on his/her 18th birthday? They actually cost less after they turn 18 because they are rarely home to eat food or use the utilities anyway. LOL

Granted, I'm only talking about shelter and food. Adult children should pay for everything else. I know I'll never charge my children rent. The minute I start looking at them thinking they should be paying rent is the minute we will have a talk about them getting their own place.
You bring up a good point that I would need to think about. I would probably make the kids pay their own portion of cell phone bills and car insurance. But all the other things like rent, food, electric, etc? No, I wouldn't make them pay that kind of thing.
 
Old 12-28-2010, 07:53 PM
 
6,777 posts, read 6,864,418 times
Reputation: 6942
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
He needs to do his own laundry, clean his own room/bathroom if he has his own and share cleaning responsibilities if he shares one, fix his own meals if he is not home when everyone eats and then clean up after himself.
In addition to that he needs to do something like pick up the living room or take out the trash or whatever.

After all he would need to do these things if he lived alone or with a roommate.

He needs to be respectful, meaning no attitude.
And as for spending the night and coming home when he feels like, that's fine, a simple "im going here and will be back at xtimehere" should do.

All I have to say is he is 18, he is going to do adult things and that's that.
I agree 100%. An adult child needs to take care of himself, parents who baby their kids are not helping them to grow up and be responsible adults who can take care of themsleves, that is part of the job of being a parent. I've known 20 yr olds who didn't know how to do laundry, or load a dishwasher, it's embarrassing for them once they realize they should know this simple stuff. The OP has said he could deal with the sex issue if the kid wasn't so disrespectful, yet people keep going on and on, and arguing about the gf/sleepover issue.

This kid is treating the parents like crap and being disrespectful, he refuses to clean w/o a major fight, he apparently lies. The parents are suffering and have every right to ask him to leave their home, they would be doing him a favor because he would be forced to grow up and act like a responsible adult. I'm sure the OP is gone, he hasn't posted, he probably got sick of all the petty bickering.
 
Old 12-28-2010, 08:11 PM
 
6,777 posts, read 6,864,418 times
Reputation: 6942
Quote:
Originally Posted by slbailey617 View Post
Honestly, my wife and I have chatted and it really boils down to a lack of respect. He doesn't treat us like parents. Last night, CHRISTMAS NIGHT, he left the family party to go spend the night at her house and didn't even say good bye or merry christmas or anything to his mother or me. Other family members are starting to notice how disrespectfully he treats us.

I could probably get by the fact he's sleeping at a girls house (because you're right, that's what adults do) but the constant snubbing his nose at us and yelling at us and treating us like crap is what makes us want to continue to tighten his leash until he starts treating us like parents and not like piles of poo in the front yard.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Magritte25 View Post
Well....I just don't know where I could have pulled that from. Not at all. Just out of the clear blue sky I suppose.

Yes sirree.
Why do you completely ignore that the OP was willing to accept the sleepover issue many, many posts ago. The real issue is that he is unwilling to accept being treated like garbage. Should adult children be able to act as horrible as they want and still be financially supported by their parents? I say NO! A true grown up doesn't act like a spoiled teenager the way this kid does. No one should have to accept being disrespected in their own home by another supposed adult.
 
Old 12-28-2010, 08:17 PM
 
27,995 posts, read 19,677,561 times
Reputation: 16471
Quote:
Originally Posted by detshen View Post
Why do you completely ignore that the OP was willing to accept the sleepover issue many, many posts ago. The real issue is that he is unwilling to accept being treated like garbage. Should adult children be able to act as horrible as they want and still be financially supported by their parents? I say NO! A true grown up doesn't act like a spoiled teenager the way this kid does. No one should have to accept being disrespected in their own home by another supposed adult.
I didn't completely ignore it. I was discussing the issue with others.

As a matter of fact, I have acknowledged what the OP said many times.
 
Old 12-28-2010, 08:23 PM
 
6 posts, read 20,391 times
Reputation: 14
I was raised that no matter how old I was if I was living in my parents house, I had to follow their rules. Good luck
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