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Old 01-01-2011, 08:48 AM
 
9,056 posts, read 6,723,723 times
Reputation: 11008

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Quote:
Originally Posted by gentlearts View Post
Don't young mothers use playpens anymore? I don't see how anything would ever get done without one. I was raised in the 50's and had my own kids in the 70's and 80's, and it seemed we parents were more about getting our kids off of us as soon as possible, rather than strapping them to us and treating them like fragile china.
None of my kids turned out warped because of this, by the way.
Nope, I didn't use one. And it's quite possible to get things done. We just babyproofed the cabinets and the electrical outlets, and let her explore where ever she wanted.

Putting your baby in a sling to go about your errands isn't "treating them like fragile china". It's a convenient and fun way to carry them around, and makes it easier to manoeuvre around grocery stores and such.

There's a train of thought these days that says keeping your infant close to you in the beginning actually makes them more independent later on. Seems to have worked for us!
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Old 01-01-2011, 08:55 AM
 
3,647 posts, read 9,307,282 times
Reputation: 5427
People used playpens more 'back in the day' because sometimes you need a break from your kids. Now, people use daycare. My nephew just turned nine and still has never been inside a grocery store - his mother uses the time before she gets off work (3:30pm) until he needs to be picked up (6:30pm) to have "me time" and is horrified that my kids not only go grocery shopping with me, but sometimes are sent off to pick up this or that in another aisle (8 & 11).

Another difference is in feeding babies. I was on cereal by two weeks, table food by 6 months and followed the same schedule for my kids. My son ate so much and so constantly in his first 2 years and yet was always in the 30% or lower for weight (90% and higher for height). Most of the other kids in our playgroup were on nutritional supplement shakes/drinks. I asked my son's pediatrician about it, and he commented that malnutrition was more common in children these days - because of what he called 'feeding fads', but not to worry because my son ate 'real food'. Same advice he gave me about vitamins.
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Old 01-01-2011, 08:56 AM
Status: "Even better than okay" (set 8 days ago)
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
51,221 posts, read 50,499,962 times
Reputation: 60100
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiana View Post
Pregnant women who were having premature contractions were told to drink, too.
My niece is 32 years old. When my sister was pregnant for her, her ob/gyn cautioned her to have no more than three alcoholic drinks per day.

Times have changed.
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Old 01-01-2011, 08:59 AM
Status: "Even better than okay" (set 8 days ago)
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
51,221 posts, read 50,499,962 times
Reputation: 60100
Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
Haven't read the whole thread but has anybody mentioned the fact that VALIUM was way overused? I think my mother stayed in a valium stupor the entire decade.

Women in professional jobs was unusual. I think most (alot) of "housewives" of that era were very unhappy. Alot of pent up frustrations and injustices is what set off the Women's Movement. Divorce was considered something to be ashamed of and I was not allowed to play with children of divorce. Of course my family was very dysfunctional and everybody would have been happier if they had divorced but the stigma was so bad they/we all just suffered in silence.

I graduated high school in 64. At subsequent reunions we found out alchoholism was rampant with our parents. We learned of things going on in families that nobody acknowledged at the time. These things are openly talked about now but kept hidden so much then. Shame plays a big part in ignorance.
No, but the Stones had a hit about that!

My mother was very unhappy, also, and we were a dysfunctional family also. She should probably have been a businesswoman, not a wife and mother, but she was born in the wrong time for that.

I knew only one divorced family in my school, too. It was whispered about.
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Old 01-01-2011, 09:02 AM
Status: "Even better than okay" (set 8 days ago)
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
51,221 posts, read 50,499,962 times
Reputation: 60100
Quote:
Originally Posted by sskkc View Post
People used playpens more 'back in the day' because sometimes you need a break from your kids. Now, people use daycare. My nephew just turned nine and still has never been inside a grocery store - his mother uses the time before she gets off work (3:30pm) until he needs to be picked up (6:30pm) to have "me time" and is horrified that my kids not only go grocery shopping with me, but sometimes are sent off to pick up this or that in another aisle (8 & 11).

Another difference is in feeding babies. I was on cereal by two weeks, table food by 6 months and followed the same schedule for my kids. My son ate so much and so constantly in his first 2 years and yet was always in the 30% or lower for weight (90% and higher for height). Most of the other kids in our playgroup were on nutritional supplement shakes/drinks. I asked my son's pediatrician about it, and he commented that malnutrition was more common in children these days - because of what he called 'feeding fads', but not to worry because my son ate 'real food'. Same advice he gave me about vitamins.
Same here. My mother came across a notebook she'd kept when I was an infant, and I had orange juice at five days. I gave my daughter cereal at two months because she was HUNGRY and breast milk just wasn't cutting it any longer. When I went to the doctor with her at three months, he said I could start her on cereal and I told him I already did. He just laughed, and said, "Well, she's growing, and she's hungry." I don't know what the current fad is for feeding schedules with real food.

I only gave my daughter baby food fruit and a couple of the vegetables. She wanted what we were having, and so I just mushed up normal food and gave it to her.
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Old 01-01-2011, 09:05 AM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,434 posts, read 41,620,437 times
Reputation: 46995
Another differences in the two parenting aproaches of the 60's and now is attitudes towards child abuse and incest.. Of course it went on then but people just accepted it and did not dare to tell anybody. Don't you see how many of the abused children of the catholic priests were of this era? Their parents might have been suspicious but it was a priest, after all, and nobody would believe it anyway.

Authority figures ruled supreme back then. I would not dare to talk to my folks the way kids do now. I would have been backhanded and often was. Well not often but enought times to know I better not do it again.

Nobody really bows to authority figures now. Do kids even have authority figures today? Teachers, principals, even parents don't dare discipline like they used to. Or at all. They are afraid they will be reported.
Attitudes toward nutrition for kids is very different too. We regularly had fried foods and dessert every meal. Rarely went to restaurants.

Date rape was a given. After all if a girl drank while out with a boy or wore a mini skirts, she was asking for it. At trials a woman's past relationships could be brought up so rarely did young women report rape. The double standard ruled every aspect of life.

And the most obvious difference may be personal to my family but I doubt it. My mother was more concerned with how things appeared than how they really were. If I had a date and they were gonna be out, I had to have him pick me up at a neighbor's rather than be alone with him -even for 10 minutes. She said this was for my protection because the neighbors would talk. Seems like our entire lives were ruled by what other people would think.

Remember reliable birth control was not available back then. Nice girls didn't do it. Unmarried girls and women could not get birth control so I can understand the paranoia about being unmarried and pregnant. It could ruin the entire families reputation in the community, to say nothing of the girls reputation. Ofr course the boy's reputation was not affected at all. If anything it was enhanced.
Legal safe abortions were not available either so women risked losing their lives in a butcher job or had to be shuttled off to a home for unwed mothers where they had to wear large headscarves if they went out in public and often were not even told the sex of the child they placed for adoption. there was very much a sense of punishment in those homes. Certainly no counselling for dealing with this tragedy. Open adoptions???Rarely happened.


I had high school friends who had to "go away" and the shame and guilt has lived with them their entire lives.

So the differences are good and bad. But at least now people seem to be more authentic and are raising their kids accordingly.
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Old 01-01-2011, 09:05 AM
 
Location: Liberal Coast
4,271 posts, read 4,983,848 times
Reputation: 3861
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801 View Post
Same here. My mother came across a notebook she'd kept when I was an infant, and I had orange juice at five days. I gave my daughter cereal at two months because she was HUNGRY and breast milk just wasn't cutting it any longer. When I went to the doctor with her at three months, he said I could start her on cereal and I told him I already did. He just laughed, and said, "Well, she's growing, and she's hungry." I don't know what the current fad is for feeding schedules with real food.

I only gave my daughter baby food fruit and a couple of the vegetables. She wanted what we were having, and so I just mushed up normal food and gave it to her.
I don't think this is the norm, but my sister's breastfeeding teacher said no solid food until one year. I think most people say six months.
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Old 01-01-2011, 09:16 AM
 
9,056 posts, read 6,723,723 times
Reputation: 11008
Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
Another differences in the two parenting aproaches of the 60's and now is attitudes towards child abuse and incest.. Of course it went on then but people just accepted it and did not dare to tell anybody. Don't you see how many of the abused children of the catholic priests were of this era? Their parents might have been suspicious but it was a priest, after all, and nobody would believe it anyway.

Authority figures ruled supreme back then. I would not dare to talk to my folks the way kids do now. I would have been backhanded and often was. Well not often but enought times to know I better not do it again.

Nobody really bows to authority figures now. Do kids even have authority figures today? Teachers, principals, even parents don't dare discipline like they used to. Or at all. They are afraid they will be reported.
Attitudes toward nutrition for kids is very different too. We regularly had fried foods and dessert every meal. Rarely went to restaurants.

Date rape was a given. After all if a girl drank while out with a boy or wore a mini skirts, she was asking for it. At trials a woman's past relationships could be brought up so rarely did young women report rape. The double standard ruled every aspect of life.

And the most obvious difference may be personal to my family but I doubt it. My mother was more concerned with how things appeared than how they really were. If I had a date and they were gonna be out, I had to have him pick me up at a neighbor's rather than be alone with him -even for 10 minutes. She said this was for my protection because the neighbors would talk. Seems like our entire lives were ruled by what other people would think.

Remember reliable birth control was not available back then. Nice girls didn't do it. Unmarried girls and women could not get birth control so I can understand the paranoia about being unmarried and pregnant. It could ruin the entire families reputation in the community, to say nothing of the girls reputation. Ofr course the boy's reputation was not affected at all. If anything it was enhanced.
Legal safe abortions were not available either so women risked losing their lives in a butcher job or had to be shuttled off to a home for unwed mothers where they had to wear large headscarves if they went out in public and often were not even told the sex of the child they placed for adoption. there was very much a sense of punishment in those homes. Certainly no counselling for dealing with this tragedy. Open adoptions???Rarely happened.


I had high school friends who had to "go away" and the shame and guilt has lived with them their entire lives.

So the differences are good and bad. But at least now people seem to be more authentic and are raising their kids accordingly.
My mother married my father at 19, who was a junkie, rather than succumb to that stigma.
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Old 01-01-2011, 09:29 AM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
84,964 posts, read 98,795,031 times
Reputation: 31376
Quote:
Originally Posted by sskkc View Post
People used playpens more 'back in the day' because sometimes you need a break from your kids. Now, people use daycare. My nephew just turned nine and still has never been inside a grocery store - his mother uses the time before she gets off work (3:30pm) until he needs to be picked up (6:30pm) to have "me time" and is horrified that my kids not only go grocery shopping with me, but sometimes are sent off to pick up this or that in another aisle (8 & 11).

Another difference is in feeding babies. I was on cereal by two weeks, table food by 6 months and followed the same schedule for my kids. My son ate so much and so constantly in his first 2 years and yet was always in the 30% or lower for weight (90% and higher for height). Most of the other kids in our playgroup were on nutritional supplement shakes/drinks. I asked my son's pediatrician about it, and he commented that malnutrition was more common in children these days - because of what he called 'feeding fads', but not to worry because my son ate 'real food'. Same advice he gave me about vitamins.
The grocery store issue is both funny and sad. Many childhood educators recommend taking little kids to the grocery store for stimulation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801 View Post
My niece is 32 years old. When my sister was pregnant for her, her ob/gyn cautioned her to have no more than three alcoholic drinks per day.

Times have changed.
I guess! 3 drinks a day! Wow, just wow!
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Old 01-01-2011, 09:30 AM
 
Location: Liberal Coast
4,271 posts, read 4,983,848 times
Reputation: 3861
Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
Another differences in the two parenting aproaches of the 60's and now is attitudes towards child abuse and incest.. Of course it went on then but people just accepted it and did not dare to tell anybody. Don't you see how many of the abused children of the catholic priests were of this era? Their parents might have been suspicious but it was a priest, after all, and nobody would believe it anyway.

Authority figures ruled supreme back then. I would not dare to talk to my folks the way kids do now. I would have been backhanded and often was. Well not often but enought times to know I better not do it again.

Nobody really bows to authority figures now. Do kids even have authority figures today? Teachers, principals, even parents don't dare discipline like they used to. Or at all. They are afraid they will be reported.
Attitudes toward nutrition for kids is very different too. We regularly had fried foods and dessert every meal. Rarely went to restaurants.

Date rape was a given. After all if a girl drank while out with a boy or wore a mini skirts, she was asking for it. At trials a woman's past relationships could be brought up so rarely did young women report rape. The double standard ruled every aspect of life.

And the most obvious difference may be personal to my family but I doubt it. My mother was more concerned with how things appeared than how they really were. If I had a date and they were gonna be out, I had to have him pick me up at a neighbor's rather than be alone with him -even for 10 minutes. She said this was for my protection because the neighbors would talk. Seems like our entire lives were ruled by what other people would think.

Remember reliable birth control was not available back then. Nice girls didn't do it. Unmarried girls and women could not get birth control so I can understand the paranoia about being unmarried and pregnant. It could ruin the entire families reputation in the community, to say nothing of the girls reputation. Ofr course the boy's reputation was not affected at all. If anything it was enhanced.
Legal safe abortions were not available either so women risked losing their lives in a butcher job or had to be shuttled off to a home for unwed mothers where they had to wear large headscarves if they went out in public and often were not even told the sex of the child they placed for adoption. there was very much a sense of punishment in those homes. Certainly no counselling for dealing with this tragedy. Open adoptions???Rarely happened.


I had high school friends who had to "go away" and the shame and guilt has lived with them their entire lives.

So the differences are good and bad. But at least now people seem to be more authentic and are raising their kids accordingly.
It was not because they were priests. It was because abuse wasn't talked about as a whole. Sexual abuse by anyone was not taken seriously until very recently. Sexual abuse was going on in other venues to the same degree as by priests. Priests are just the scapegoats and easy to hate by most people.

I also don't think open adoptions are very healthy the way they are done these days.
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