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Old 01-06-2011, 09:56 AM
 
9,056 posts, read 6,723,723 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LisaMc46 View Post
I think Finster was referring to parents who force their children to color their hair or make other cosmetic changes. Adult women should be free to do as they wish.
Yep, that's it.

Just to add - my dd developed a compound hemangioma above her left eyebrow when she was 3 months. It grew and grew and looked like a huge bump with a big bruise on it. Her pediatrician told us to leave it, because it would go away on it's own, eventually - and that parents were often more concerned about it than the child. However, I consulted a pediatric plastic surgeon about it, because I was worried about her social development and self esteem, as she'd be walking around looking like she'd banged into a wall for most of her childhood.

He agreed with me that it certainly would be detrimental to her overall well being, psychologically. We had it removed when she was 8 months, and it was an hour long general anesthetic procedure - but we really thought it was worth it, and she only has a small scar there now, whereas we don't know what kind of mark the hemangioma would have left had we let it involute on it's own.

So long story not so short, I'm not against all procedures for cosmetic reasons, I think they are an important consideration in a child's development.
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Old 01-06-2011, 09:57 AM
 
3,741 posts, read 2,917,286 times
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I would certainly look into how much it would cost and how long it would take, if indeed orthodontics are needed.

Of course, I can't actually see how big "the gap" is or anything.

But FWIW, I'm taking my 8 year old for a preliminary consultation this spring. Have you read about "preventive dentistry"? Apparantly, they can do miracles now with just simple rubberbands.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:03 AM
 
Location: BK All Day
4,480 posts, read 8,317,230 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
One with a buck tooth problem definitely would be one I as a parent would handle at an early stage.
Buck teeth can actually be really dangerous. I had them for a long time and every time I fell they went into my lower lip. I still have little scars from biting myself.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:07 AM
 
27,993 posts, read 19,647,023 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
OMG how many people, male and female color to get rid of grey hair?
It's a decision most women have to make at some point in their lives.
Keywords being women and their. I thought we were talking about children.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:12 AM
 
4,267 posts, read 5,140,780 times
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I would only fix a gap in my child's teeth if he or she wanted it done. I kind of like the way a small gap as described in the OP looks on people.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:31 AM
 
1,173 posts, read 3,965,827 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FinsterRufus View Post
Yep, that's it.

Just to add - my dd developed a compound hemangioma above her left eyebrow when she was 3 months. It grew and grew and looked like a huge bump with a big bruise on it. Her pediatrician told us to leave it, because it would go away on it's own, eventually - and that parents were often more concerned about it than the child. However, I consulted a pediatric plastic surgeon about it, because I was worried about her social development and self esteem, as she'd be walking around looking like she'd banged into a wall for most of her childhood.

He agreed with me that it certainly would be detrimental to her overall well being, psychologically. We had it removed when she was 8 months, and it was an hour long general anesthetic procedure - but we really thought it was worth it, and she only has a small scar there now, whereas we don't know what kind of mark the hemangioma would have left had we let it involute on it's own.

So long story not so short, I'm not against all procedures for cosmetic reasons, I think they are an important consideration in a child's development.

I would have done the same, gap in the front teeth is just a feature. A large red spot on the a childs face is definitely a HEY LOOK AT ME, PICK ON ME! kind of thing, not saying it's right but it's definitely how children are.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:34 AM
 
10,452 posts, read 10,226,978 times
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If it posed a medical threat, yes. If it was just for esthetic purposes, no. My child could choose to do it for esthetic reasons later.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:48 AM
 
10,452 posts, read 10,226,978 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
No it is wrong to color a child's hair. IMO
I'm of the generation where Tonette home perms were de rigeur for most little girls with straight hair. I think that was wrong.

But something like "bad" teeth is something which needs to be addressed at a young age. Yes it would be best to let each person decide for themselves as adults but by then the damage might be too great. I mean physical damage to the jaw or pyscological damage to the kids self esteem. As parents we have a responsibility to make the best decisions for our kids health as we can and I see braces as a health issue, not so much as an appearance issue. But that certainly comes into play.

Now a simple gap might not be that important. There are gaps and there are gaps. One with a buck tooth problem definitely would be one I as a parent would handle at an early stage.
I understand how it's unnecessary but I don't see how it's "wrong" per se. Hair grows and gets cut so you don't really have to worry about damaging hair, especially in kids, whose hair usually grows pretty fast.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:51 AM
 
Location: Western Washington
8,004 posts, read 9,653,945 times
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It's appalling how shallow some people can be, I mean, truly! On the post about a mother highlighting her daughter's hair because she doesn't think it's pretty enough. How? I mean, HOW can a mother not see what she's doing to her daughter? Sure, I think we're supposed to help our kids be the "best that they can be", but where do you draw the line? Also, just because a MOTHER doesn't find something attractive, what makes her think that others do? Oh, if you don't find one of your child's features attractive, you think you have the right to submit them to unnecessary procedures, slamming their self-esteem, making them feel like they're not good enough? Of course, I'm sure these mothers spend quite a lot of time making their kids feel bad about themselves BEFORE they actually undertake the procedure. Ugh!

There are some things that SHOULD be taken care of, like actual disfigurements that can cause a child a great deal of emotional trauma, but the little things that make us individuals, they should be left alone. Sorry, I just get a little worked up about some of those things. I remember being in junior high with a girl whose mother had 5 sons and the one daughter. She always had highlights, the most professional hairstyles, braces, was in the most superb athletic shape (because of constantly being enrolled in the YMCA), the most expensive designer clothes, and get this (this was in the 70s), always had a suntan! Here's the clincher....many times, she would express her frustration because it wasn't HER idea. She was constantly complaining because her MOM wanted her to look a certain way and she didn't have a choice about the matter.....it was what her mother wanted. Her mom actually told her she looked BETTER that way. It was sad y'all. As beautiful as she always looked, her self-esteem was destroyed. She thought that her mother (and consequently her) thought she was so homely that she needed those things done to make her look pretty. To this day, and yeah, it's been 35 years, that situation has always haunted me.
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Old 01-06-2011, 10:56 AM
 
1,173 posts, read 3,965,827 times
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So just to dig a little deeper for those who said they would get it fixed around what age would you do it at?
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