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Parenting is overrated. The Chinese kid might get into Harvard, and maybe another kid will get into Michigan State. But that doesn't determine your entire life.
I went to a top 3 school, my boss went to a third quartile school. I will never achieve his level of business success(however he will nto achieve my level of family success).
How do you define success?
To me it means:
Stay in touch with God. Think about His outlook on everything you do.
Serve your community. Use your skills to help other people. Talk to lonely people every chance you get. No one should have to be lonely.
Find something that you enjoy and are good at.
Work had to be the best at doing that thing that you possibly can.
Balance your work and your life. Do not let work be your life.
Be happy and remember to realize and enjoy how wonderfully complex and marvelous our world is.
Build your life around relationships, not things.
Making money is not success to me. I work with lots of people who have tons of money. Almost none of them are happy. Most are wholly dissatisfied with life.
Chinese parenting would not produce successful children by my definition. It would produce a bunch of unhappy neurotic individuals who cannot accept that there is almost always someone out there who is better at a given thing, richer, prettier, healthier, or whatever.
To me make your reasonable best effort and be happy with whatever you accomplish is more a measure of a successful at being human.
That is the title of the article from the WSJ. An interesting opinion piece... what do people think? I think that using the Chinese mothering method guarantees that your child will achieve on average a higher level of success than not. But I don't think that the most successful children are bred this way and in rare instances it might stifle a talent that the child has (though true talents are rare, so the risk of this is fairly small).
I went to a top 3 school, my boss went to a third quartile school. I will never achieve his level of business success(however he will nto achieve my level of family success).
Just curious but how do you know he will never achieve your level of family success?
My best friend is ethnically Chinese and she has a classic "tiger" mom. She was very successful all through out school and had a decent research career. Ultimately she choose the "tiger mom" light version of parenting for her daughter meaning high expectations and only moderate pressure.
Despite being successful I think it is telling that she did not choose to parent that way herself.
Actually, they're not. They're not at the top of the list, but American students aren't at the bottom, either.
In any case, there's more than one "right" way to do things. Take a look at other successful countries from around the world and it's easy to see that there is no one one magic method for "success," although as someone else as noted, there are many different definitions of success.
In a worldwide economy can we afford to be middle of the pack? Not being last won't matter if the jobs are going where the students excell.
In a worldwide economy can we afford to be middle of the pack? Not being last won't matter if the jobs are going where the students excell.
The jobs are going where people will work for $4 a day and where the government does not care how much pollution is generated.
We still excell in ideas, technology and creativity. Other countries are catching up, we ar enot falling behind. However for some reason many cultures are much better at taking our ideas and inventions and improving them than they are at coming up with their own ideas and inventions.
Just today I told my daughter that when she grows up she should find a career that she loves that also pays well. She then started asking me how much certain jobs pay. I felt sort of guilty talking about money, but she needs to know that you can make a decent living doing something rewarding. Is this Tigerish?
Just today I told my daughter that when she grows up she should find a career that she loves that also pays well. She then started asking me how much certain jobs pay. I felt sort of guilty talking about money, but she needs to know that you can make a decent living doing something rewarding. Is this Tigerish?
IMO, no. However, to avoid being Tigerish, I would think of my goal in different terms. It is in my daughter's interest to be aware, or be exposed, to the different ways people earn a living.
IMO, children of families who make money or have money have this experience first hand by the people they are exposed to. Of course, there are those parents who expect their children to go into the same field they did.
It think it is possible to gain this exposure in whatever socio-economic culture you may be in now. I believe at each level there are those who perform better within that group compared to others.
He does not have a family. All of his time is devoted to career.
Maybe that's his choice ... Judging others choices based upon your choices ...
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Not being last won't matter if the jobs are going where the students excell.
