U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Happy Easter!
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 01-11-2011, 11:11 AM
 
9,057 posts, read 6,750,096 times
Reputation: 11013

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zimbochick View Post
Haha - thanks for posting this. I guess the response wasn't quite what she expected?
Right? I agree with Hopes, you should have the courage of your convictions, and not wuss out.

After all, what would her mother say?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 01-11-2011, 11:25 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 89,260,654 times
Reputation: 30265
Quote:
Originally Posted by FinsterRufus View Post
Right? I agree with Hopes, you should have the courage of your convictions, and not wuss out.

After all, what would her mother say?
Oh, that was a good one! Thanks for the laugh!

Her mother is probably calling her from China to give her a piece of her mind after reading that two-step!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2011, 11:56 AM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,437 posts, read 41,809,051 times
Reputation: 47043
I saw her on Today this morning and she said she wasn't telling people how to raise their children but rather how she was raised and why and how she rasies her own children

Most of you are too young to remember Mao and that China was a very secret country. Everybody had to wear black clothes, look and act alike and carry around the little b ook with the teachings of Mao. I remember seeing secret tapes from China when I was young. They were taught to be conformist and if generation after generation passes this on it becomes the norm.


There have always been stereotypes of brilliant Asian (not just Chinese) children and talk of how these children are pushed,. It was to ensure that the old folks would be cared for economically by their successful kids. If not they would starve.

I remember years ago Gary Treudeau did a Boonesbury series about Asian children and their "superior intellect". One panel in particular showed Asian parents with a little girl stating "We only seek computers for our children." I still have it somewhere.

So to question why they do it you need to have some historical background. But you certainly can have an opinion without that background.

And many immigrants come to this nation for econmic and political reasons. They don't want to embrace our culture and sometimes refuse to learn the language. They expect everything to be the same as their own culture but to live here. I'm not saying to abandon your native culture but there must be some balance.

We've all read about "honor killings" by some Muslims after they move to US. They feel their culture dictates this even tho they know it is illegal here.

Very sad to bring a child to this country, have them go to our schools, partake in our society and still expect them to follow the ways of the "old country".

I used to live in a community with many Japanese familes (Peachtree City GA) They would come in from teeny tiny homes with 7 day work weeks and their children were raised in 2000sq ft homes with pools and yards and became very Americanized. Then they had to go back to Japan and the teeny tiny homes and differences the kids had never been aware of and the whole family would not be able to adjust. Very sad.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2011, 12:32 PM
 
Location: Austin Texas
2 posts, read 2,038 times
Reputation: 10
Studies have shown that young children need a fair amount of unstructured play to attain the greatest creative ability. Yes many US parents neglect making their kids quit being lazy and study more and practice more whether its music or athletics. A minority of Chinese are into martial arts so some do include athletics in training their kids. The Chinese and Japanese, Far Easterners in general show less brilliance in abstract reasoning than those from India or Europe. Indian parents are pretty strict too but there must be something in their child training that allows for more questioning and not just rote learning.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2011, 12:36 PM
 
Location: New York City
2,814 posts, read 5,871,448 times
Reputation: 3143
Quote:
Originally Posted by malamute View Post
I believe the best parenting advice I ever received was from a parent of a Down's Syndrome young adult. She said her daughter is a very happy woman, very happy with her life - and being happy with the gift of your life is what it's all about. She said it's better to have a happy retarded child (yes her words) than a brilliant physicist who hates his life.

How many people end up unhappy their entire lives, never satisfied with their success, how many end up jumping out of a window because they were never taught or shown how to be content?

Those poor Chinese children that never learned the pleasure of watching ants, or laying on the ground watching clouds drift by. Never allowed to play freely a whole summer day, just being kids having fun and exploring on their own all the millions of things kids explore on their own.

Chinese kids could never write a Tom Sawyer book, or even imagine life without the constant presence of mother telling them they must do nothing but practice practice practice.

Americans have our faults but in our souls it's "give us liberty or give us death". And we prefer some liberty and freedom for our kids - within reason of course but we don't want to completely control them, we want them to be unique independent individuals - and really if they are happy and content and average in their success? Is that so terrible?
I think we need to remember that not all Chinese families are like the one in the article.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2011, 12:49 PM
 
Location: Denver 'burbs
21,164 posts, read 22,188,272 times
Reputation: 35686
Quote:
I saw her on Today this morning and she said she wasn't telling people how to raise their children but rather how she was raised and why and how she rasies her own children
Which is certainly her prerogative. It's the idea that this is so obviously "superior" that bothers me. That if our goals for our children and our ideas on childrearing are different, then we are "inferior".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2011, 01:26 PM
 
852 posts, read 1,139,276 times
Reputation: 1042
Well, all I know is that my daughter is about to walk in the door, and I'll probably let her eat Lucky Charms and play with her Polly Pockets before she does her homework. So, she's pretty much screwed in the success department I guess.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2011, 01:34 PM
 
Location: Geneva, IL
12,976 posts, read 11,826,500 times
Reputation: 14681
Quote:
Originally Posted by lucygirl951 View Post
Well, all I know is that my daughter is about to walk in the door, and I'll probably let her eat Lucky Charms and play with her Polly Pockets before she does her homework. So, she's pretty much screwed in the success department I guess.
Haha! We are having a snow-day, one is playing wii, and one dress-up, so my kids are completely written-off too.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2011, 01:40 PM
 
852 posts, read 1,139,276 times
Reputation: 1042
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zimbochick View Post
Haha! We are having a snow-day, one is playing wii, and one dress-up, so my kids are completely written-off too.
The wii and dress up!!! Forget it!!! They'll be living with you well into their 40s!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 01-11-2011, 02:37 PM
 
11,617 posts, read 19,777,687 times
Reputation: 12056
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zimbochick View Post
Haha! We are having a snow-day, one is playing wii, and one dress-up, so my kids are completely written-off too.
My son plays piano, saxophone, and percussion so he is probably ruined for life due to being exposed to those inferior musical instruments. PLUS-he only practices for about 45 minutes a day and he LIKES PRACTICING.

As if all those inferior musical instruments were not bad enough my oldest son plays football and he wrestles. What a waste of life he is.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top