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Old 01-23-2011, 03:47 PM
 
43,012 posts, read 88,958,716 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryleeII View Post
Perhaps pictures of the items, along with the receipts. Sad I have to document my parenting to state agencies.
Receipts and pictures won't help you. There are abusive parents purposely prohibit their children from wearing clothes they buy for them.

Since you're taking a hard-ass attitude with CPS, the social workers will believe your son over your receipts and pictures. The judges will too.
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Old 01-23-2011, 03:48 PM
 
2,251 posts, read 4,312,031 times
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Tell him no more Axe or lunch money unless he wears a coat.
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Old 01-23-2011, 03:50 PM
 
43,012 posts, read 88,958,716 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cleasach View Post
Tell him no more Axe or lunch money unless he wears a coat.
Bad idea. She's already in trouble for her son's lunch account balance.
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Old 01-23-2011, 04:05 PM
 
5,703 posts, read 15,485,360 times
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This post is weird. There is some serious dysfunction going on within your household. I have a 14 yr old that wears hoodies and I have not had CPS get involved. He does wear a coat after it starts to get very cold though but it has to get REALLY cold for him to switch to a coat. You should see the kids at the bus stop. Looks like a bunch of eager tourists heading to Florida. There is a neighbor boy that wore shorts up until November. The kid made me cold just looking at him.

I understand your son is calling CPS but why? You have said before you have problems with him. Does he realize he could be taken away from you? Being reasonable with CPS will make their visits stop. They are quite busy with real cases (if yours is not) and will quickly leave you alone. But if you are being hostile then it gives them just cause to keep showing up after a phone call. I think there are bigger issues at hand than designer clothes and hoodies.
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Old 01-23-2011, 04:14 PM
 
1,302 posts, read 1,529,398 times
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Please let CPS take your children and place them in a foster home. It would be hard to put them in an environment as awful as your home. Good Lord, I hope you really are just an internet persona and this is not real.
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Old 01-23-2011, 04:20 PM
 
Location: New York City
2,814 posts, read 5,856,135 times
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I can't wrap my head around this situation. What is missing here? What is the history with these children? Are they in need of counseling? Why do they run to CPS for everything? Something doesn't seem right.
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Old 01-23-2011, 04:38 PM
 
43,012 posts, read 88,958,716 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fallingwater View Post
This post is weird. There is some serious dysfunction going on within your household. I have a 14 yr old that wears hoodies and I have not had CPS get involved. He does wear a coat after it starts to get very cold though but it has to get REALLY cold for him to switch to a coat. You should see the kids at the bus stop. Looks like a bunch of eager tourists heading to Florida. There is a neighbor boy that wore shorts up until November. The kid made me cold just looking at him.
One of my son's friends showed up to go skiing with us wearing only shorts and a hoody. Sure, I thought his parents were insane, but not neglectful. They clearly were letting him "learn by natural consequences." I opted to dig through my attic and give him some extra winter gear. He wore shorts all winter and CPS never bothered that family.

There has to be something serious going on for CPS to be regularly involved. Few children call CPS to report their parents for absolutely nothing. And even fewer parents are crazy enough to be hostile with CPS.
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Old 01-23-2011, 04:52 PM
 
9,454 posts, read 15,015,271 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LeavingMassachusetts View Post
Please let CPS take your children and place them in a foster home. It would be hard to put them in an environment as awful as your home. Good Lord, I hope you really are just an internet persona and this is not real.
Yep, its a real #ell hole here!

BTW, my ds is in counseling, for what purpose, I can't see. We pay, he goes, he gripes, then counselors turn us over to CPS, school turns us over to CPS, the kid calls CPS, all in all there's been 20+ CPS cases over the last 2 years, all ruled out. So, even CPS can't figure out what's going on. Perhaps nothing is going on? Don't you think after 2+ years and 20+ investigatons, they would find something?

What you have is a kid who's determined to get his own way, and a system that encourages it. Parents aren't supported by "the system" any more, they're vilified.

There's nothing going on here but a decent, normal home. I've even told CPS to take ds if they want him, but they "declined". Ok, so, we continue to provide a decent home, and ds continues to whine to any authority that smiles at him, and...........the beat goes on.

That's why I refuse to talk to them anymore unless and until they come up with something factual, not just more gripping from a spoiled rotten kid. Seems anytime there's a "confiict" (ie, we don't buy him something, don't let him go somewhere, etc) he makes another complaint to CPS. They investigate all complaints, but I'm sick of the attitude that he's being abused. Hey, he's the one abusing us!
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Old 01-23-2011, 05:03 PM
 
2,251 posts, read 4,312,031 times
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This is just truly bizarre.

You're right Hopes. What was I thinking?
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Old 01-23-2011, 05:11 PM
 
Location: earth?
7,288 posts, read 10,366,635 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryleeII View Post
Yep, its a real #ell hole here!

BTW, my ds is in counseling, for what purpose, I can't see. We pay, he goes, he gripes, then counselors turn us over to CPS, school turns us over to CPS, the kid calls CPS, all in all there's been 20+ CPS cases over the last 2 years, all ruled out. So, even CPS can't figure out what's going on. Perhaps nothing is going on? Don't you think after 2+ years and 20+ investigatons, they would find something?

What you have is a kid who's determined to get his own way, and a system that encourages it. Parents aren't supported by "the system" any more, they're vilified.

There's nothing going on here but a decent, normal home. I've even told CPS to take ds if they want him, but they "declined". Ok, so, we continue to provide a decent home, and ds continues to whine to any authority that smiles at him, and...........the beat goes on.

That's why I refuse to talk to them anymore unless and until they come up with something factual, not just more gripping from a spoiled rotten kid. Seems anytime there's a "confiict" (ie, we don't buy him something, don't let him go somewhere, etc) he makes another complaint to CPS. They investigate all complaints, but I'm sick of the attitude that he's being abused. Hey, he's the one abusing us!
I don't know why counselors would turn you over to CPS unless he told them you did something to him and they believed him over you.

Have you sat in family counseling with him and had him explain just what he thinks he is doing and why?

What is your honest explanation? Did anything traumatic happen to him? Has he always been difficult? WHY does he have a chip on his shoulders? What is the reason? It can't be that he is JUST SPOILED. What do his aunts and uncles and grandparents say? What do his teachers and school counselors say about him? What does your daughter and husband think?

Is he just a born sociopath? If not, something must have happened.

I do pity you if you are really trying to provide a good home for your kids and this is the result. I can't imagine the stress of living like this. I think ONE CPS call would have made me insane - I can't even imagine 20 . . . that is just outrageous. CPS must have some theory of what is going on in the home after 20 calls. What have they told you is their theory?

Please provide some more background. Do you resent your son now? I know I would. Can he go live with someone else?
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