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My daughter will marry soon. We are the typical middle class family. I am single with no job and am living off my savings. Father has not helped with the wedding cost so I have given them $1000.00 to help with the wedding letting them know this is part of their wedding gift. I also bought her wedding dress which was only $300.00. Wondering how much more money should I give as a wedding gift? Please let me know what you would do if you were me not knowing when I might find job. Thank you
My best friend and I both recently got engaged and here's what our mothers are doing:
Friend: Mom got the dress- $500
Me: Nothing, but they are paying for their cross country plane tickets and hotel to attend (if we were getting married on the other side of the country, my mom offered up the church she works for as a venue because it would be free).
We both know our parents love us but can't afford to spend more and we're fine with it. Also, because my mom hasn't put any money in, she has no say in the decorations/logistics our wedding. My fiance's mom has offered to help, but that means she also wants to help with the planning. Fortunately she has good taste and I love her, but that situation could go wrong very easily.
If your daughter is aware of your financial situation (meaning she knows you're not working and living off savings), she should understand that you just can't give her a lot of money. If she is rude to you about it, then you have bigger problems than just financial.
Best of luck to you and your daughter! There are some great websites with budget wedding ideas.
Shellsandwater, your "obligation" is over! Put yourself first. If your daughter is mature enough to get married, she's mature enough to realize your financial straits and not expect one thing more from you.
Shellsandwater, your "obligation" is over! Put yourself first. If your daughter is mature enough to get married, she's mature enough to realize your financial straits and not expect one thing more from you.
I also have to say that you have done enough already and no need to put yourself in financial ruin due to a wedding . Good luck and hopefully all can turn out well .
I think you've done more than enough, and have been incredibly generous. You really don't want to go into more debt for this, and I doubt that your daughter wants you to, either. Just offer your help and (non-financial) support in the wedding planning process and on the day itself.
Considering you don't have a job, I think you've done enough. If you have a job and money saved, maybe you could get them a nice 1st anniversary gift.
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