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View Poll Results: Should We Move Sooner, Later, or Not at All?
Move after Current School Year (Summer 2011) 19 95.00%
Move after Next School Year (Summer 2012) 0 0%
Don't Move and Just See DH on weekends 1 5.00%
Voters: 20. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 02-16-2011, 06:30 PM
 
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Move now. It will be less of a headache in the end. You can't change past decisions even if you now feel they are mistakes. Yes, it will be another school switch for your son, but that's going to happen sooner or later and I don't see that one more year will make such a big difference at eight.

Splitting up the family should only be done as a last resort. It will require that your kids live in limbo for a year before making the move they would have had to do anyway. Being away from their dad and having a (to whatever degree) more stressed out mom because of the separation isn't ideal.
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Old 02-17-2011, 10:02 AM
 
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Move after the school year. If it helps at all, my son is 8 as well and he has been in 5 schools already (including preschools). I think he is about done with moving, but he also really wants to move this time (we are waiting to hear on a job) because he would be closer to grandparents and be able to play some of the sports he loves and can't do here. Anyhow, if my husband gets the job, he would move in early April and we would follow after the school year is done--in early June. We wouldn't see him at all during that time. However, I think this is better than pulling them out right now.
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Old 02-17-2011, 10:38 AM
 
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It isn't always easier to move during the summer months. It can be much easier to meet and make friends while school is still in session. My kids had a tough time when we moved in July one year. It seemed like the entire town had packed up for the summer and nobody was around to play with.

Of course, once school opened we discovered tons of kids within walking distance.
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Old 02-17-2011, 11:08 AM
 
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Move after this school year. It would be different if you had a teen who was a junior in high school, and you wanted to wait a year for the teenager remain for senior year. At your children's ages, it's way more important to keep the family together. It's not going to be any easier or harder for them to move now than waiting until next year. There's just no good reason to put it off at the age your children are now.
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Old 02-17-2011, 12:22 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
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I would also say to move at the end of the school year, over the Summer. Your children can finish out their year at their current schools and start fresh.
We have moved quite a bit due to my husband's job, have been in our new home for almost 2 years now. We moved when our oldest was in 1st grade, and she did just fine.
Our youngest was only 3 at the time, so it really didn't seem to make any difference to her at all.

My husband moved 6 months before we did, but it was because we were trying to sell our house & were hoping it would sell within that time frame. That did not happen, so we just thought it was best for us to be together as a family. It was a struggle for me with the 2 kids alone for 6 months (he came home on the weekends when time allowed) but we made it through. My husband has always traveled alot for his job, so it wasn't that much of a difference for me.

Good Luck to you whatever you decide to do!
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Old 02-17-2011, 02:47 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
It isn't always easier to move during the summer months. It can be much easier to meet and make friends while school is still in session. My kids had a tough time when we moved in July one year. It seemed like the entire town had packed up for the summer and nobody was around to play with.

Of course, once school opened we discovered tons of kids within walking distance.

You bring up a good point. But since the OP is only moving 4 hours away, perhaps she could take the kids back to their old town for a few days--go to the beach, visit favorite places and meet up with old friends. This would also help reinforce the lesson that just because we leave a place it doesn't mean all of our old friends are gone.

Another note to the OP: make the move fun. Be upbeat about it. Remind your children of the great things in the new town. We have been prepping my oldest for a possible move for months (without letting him know about it). Things like, "Wouldn't it be great if daddy got a job up north sometime? Then you could play hockey again and go skiing!" I also always tell my son that now he has his old friends and will make new friends in the new town and that "isn't it great that now you have friends all over the country!" If you are nervous about or dislike the move, your children will pick up on it and be unhappy too.
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Old 02-17-2011, 03:08 PM
 
Location: somewhere
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I agree with everyone, make the move. With an 8 yr old I would think it might be better to get him in a new school before summer comes around so he can make new friends.

As far as your rental, talk to your LL and if at all possible give him a timeframe and let him start advertising for new tenants before you move.
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Old 02-17-2011, 07:38 PM
 
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Can I dare wonder WHY would "never moving and only see hubby on weekends" be a poll option?

The OP including that as an option in the poll makes me feel she doesn't value living with her husband to begin with.
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Old 02-17-2011, 09:07 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
Can I dare wonder WHY would "never moving and only see hubby on weekends" be a poll option?

The OP including that as an option in the poll makes me feel she doesn't value living with her husband to begin with.
No, Hopes, you cannot "dare wonder why". I have enough drama in my life without your feelings about whether or not I value living with my husband of 15 years. That is going beyond courtesy and good sense.

I have to say, though, that given the fact that he will be in China, India, Europe and South America for up to 3 weeks at a time, we have wondered if it is worth uprooting the children from the schools they like and are doing very well in, for the 3 of us to move to a city we are just "eh" about when he won't even be there much of the time. And before you say well, maybe he shouldn't take the job, you don't know our financial situation, so you cannot judge.

To the rest of you, thank you, and I really value your kind and thoughtful responses.
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Old 02-17-2011, 09:13 PM
 
3,741 posts, read 2,917,286 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crazyme4878 View Post
Another note to the OP: make the move fun. Be upbeat about it. Remind your children of the great things in the new town. If you are nervous about or dislike the move, your children will pick up on it and be unhappy too.

Thanks--I hadn't thought of that. It has always been my dream to live near the beach, and now that we do, it really breaks my heart to leave it. We live in one of the prettiest cities in the country, and we're going back to a place that is not my dream.

BUT I guess the dream is good only so long as you can afford it.

I will try to develop a positive attitude about it. I wish it were a move to someplace exciting like, Seattle or Denver or Santa Fe or something.
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