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Reading the OP's responses, I think a couple people are spot on. I would switch the midnight feeding to a formula one, the baby may simply not be getting enough at that feeding to keep her satisfied. Another one would be checking up on the reflux. If you go through the routine she is sleeping about 4 hours straight until that midnight feeding and then the fun begins. I think it's she's either not getting enough to eat at that point or she has reflux and it's bothering her to lay down after she eats.
The back arching is a classic sign of reflux. You may want to investigate that aspect further.
I've read up on it, but it's weird, she doesn't do the back arching thing when she's being bottle or breast fed, it only happens when she's confined (i.e, in the bumbo chair, or being held down to be changed) or when she's distressed, like when she's sitting in her crib. Also, a lot of what I was reading mentioned that a major sign of reflux is spitting up (thought not in all cases), which she hasn't done in a long time.
It's worth exploring though, just in case, I'll talk to my wife about it. We've started calling our child night-Satan, since during the day, she's as happy and playful as you could ask for. It's just the midnight to 6:00 a.m. timeframs where she morphs into a little she-devil.
*Edit* Just to add, I spoke to my wife about the possibility of reflux, and she brought up something that I had neglected to mention. The baby has one of those sleep wedges under the sheet in her crib, which is supposed to help avoid reflux.
neither one of my 4 children slept thru the night till they were past 2. A living nightmare, especially since I had a neighbor with 6 children, all of whom slept straight thru at 4 weeks.
One thing which helped tho is that we found a special stuffed toy and when we put the kid to bed we loved on , hugged and kissed all over the toy and told child toy had all our love so to grab that if they woke up. It worked to a degree.
Even tho they didn't sleep thru the night till much too old, we did not always go into them every night. We stopped going in to them at about age 16 months. After that when they woke up we let them cry it out for about 15 minutes and they eventually went back to sleep.
I think that the "sleep problem" is only a problem if you perceive it that way. In my experience, it is actually quite rare for a 9 month old to "sleep through the night", if by that you mean sleep 10-12 hours in a stretch without waking. The definition of "sleep through the night" is actually one 5 hour stretch. Lower your expectations. If it was common for babies to sleep through the night, do you think we'd have so many threads full of sleepless parents wondering why theirs doesn't? Or do you think we'd have so many books and methods and strong opinions on how to get it to happen? The truth is, sleeping through the night is really not all that common. If your baby doesn't do it yet, don't worry so much about it. It's totally normal.
As is still feeding at night, particularly breastfeeding. It is true that at a certain age it may become less about the food and more about the parental contact, but that does not make it less important to the baby. Is your wife apart from your child during the day? There is a very common phenomenon called "reverse cycling" in which babies want to nurse at night in particular to achieve the milk and closeness that they missed out on during the day. Both of my children did this after I went back to work, and it is very common for nursing/working mothers. I wonder if a baby with an at-home mom might do this too in response to being mixed-fed with bottles, since they are missing nursings too. Just a thought. In my house, our routine is to put baby to sleep in her room. When she wakes at some point in the night, take her into the bed with me and let her nurse at will for the rest of the night. Her ability to put herself to sleep at the beginning of the night is not detrimentally impacted by co-sleeping at the end of the night.
My opinion is that your child has a need, and as parents it is our job to identify that need and take care of it. A need fulfilled, goes away. A need suppressed, just manifests in other ways.
*Edit* Just to add, I spoke to my wife about the possibility of reflux, and she brought up something that I had neglected to mention. The baby has one of those sleep wedges under the sheet in her crib, which is supposed to help avoid reflux.
...and I'm sure your car gets the exact same MPG that was on the window sticker...
I think that the "sleep problem" is only a problem if you perceive it that way. In my experience, it is actually quite rare for a 9 month old to "sleep through the night", if by that you mean sleep 10-12 hours in a stretch without waking. The definition of "sleep through the night" is actually one 5 hour stretch. Lower your expectations. If it was common for babies to sleep through the night, do you think we'd have so many threads full of sleepless parents wondering why theirs doesn't? Or do you think we'd have so many books and methods and strong opinions on how to get it to happen? The truth is, sleeping through the night is really not all that common. If your baby doesn't do it yet, don't worry so much about it. It's totally normal.
As is still feeding at night, particularly breastfeeding. It is true that at a certain age it may become less about the food and more about the parental contact, but that does not make it less important to the baby. Is your wife apart from your child during the day? There is a very common phenomenon called "reverse cycling" in which babies want to nurse at night in particular to achieve the milk and closeness that they missed out on during the day. Both of my children did this after I went back to work, and it is very common for nursing/working mothers. I wonder if a baby with an at-home mom might do this too in response to being mixed-fed with bottles, since they are missing nursings too. Just a thought. In my house, our routine is to put baby to sleep in her room. When she wakes at some point in the night, take her into the bed with me and let her nurse at will for the rest of the night. Her ability to put herself to sleep at the beginning of the night is not detrimentally impacted by co-sleeping at the end of the night.
My opinion is that your child has a need, and as parents it is our job to identify that need and take care of it. A need fulfilled, goes away. A need suppressed, just manifests in other ways.
I totally agree with this! None of my 3 kids were great sleepers.But, I always enjoyed just being with them and knew that it would be over some time down the road. It's hard with your first, especially if your wife has to go to work as well. I know it probably doesn't help to hear this, but it does go by in a flash. All baby's are different, just like people.
I spoke with our pediatrician, they kind of told me what was mentioned above. If she's not doing the back-arching thing while she's feeding, and she never spits up, it's not reflux. The pediatrician is an advocate of crying it out.
Just a tip: Ask you pediatrician for medical advice, not parenting advice. I really don't think they have much more authority than any other parent when it comes to parenting advice. Meaning, listen to your ped about reflux, not CIO.
Is your wife apart from your child during the day? There is a very common phenomenon called "reverse cycling" in which babies want to nurse at night in particular to achieve the milk and closeness that they missed out on during the day. Both of my children did this after I went back to work, and it is very common for nursing/working mothers. I wonder if a baby with an at-home mom might do this too in response to being mixed-fed with bottles, since they are missing nursings too. <snip>
My opinion is that your child has a need, and as parents it is our job to identify that need and take care of it. A need fulfilled, goes away. A need suppressed, just manifests in other ways.
Exactly what I was going to say! Our kids don't stop needing us just because the sun goes down. Some kids have a higher need for contact, holding, and connection. You could find ways to change the behavior, but the need would still be there. 9 months is very, very young.
We coslept, and both of my guys slept really well, and if they did wake, getting them back to sleep was very easy. I understand if that's something you don't want to try, but I did want to share what worked for us.
I spoke with our pediatrician, they kind of told me what was mentioned above. If she's not doing the back-arching thing while she's feeding, and she never spits up, it's not reflux. The pediatrician is an advocate of crying it out.
I guess your pediatrician never heard of silent reflux, I'd be looking for a new pediatrician if I was you. My son suffered a lot with this and it turned out we were overfeeding him. The problem starts when they are laid down because that's when the acid can come up the esophagus. The wedge can help but it's not a surefire prevention method in any way.
Regarding soft toys, before 1 year babies shouldn't have anything but a fitted sheet in their crib. No coverlet, no duvet, no bumpers, no toys. They are still prone to suffocation from these things at this age.
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