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Old 03-04-2011, 04:18 PM
 
11,615 posts, read 19,738,691 times
Reputation: 12051

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Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
IThe cruel, unintelligent, and bizarre comments to this mother have taken soo much energy and time to deal with.
I agree very strongly with this. Marylee has come here for help. She does not claim she has been the perfect parent. She is asking for help with a heartbreaking problem.

If you don't like a particular poster on the board please feel free to ignore them but it is beyond cruel to continue to harp on someone's imperfections when they are seeking help.

While I agree with the person who said that many kids with drug problems do come from dysfunctional homes that does not mean anyone should see that as a license to be cruel to others. Most parents (dysfunctional or not) want to do right by their kids. If they ask for help either offer help or leave them alone.

 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:21 PM
 
9,056 posts, read 6,732,898 times
Reputation: 11008
Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
I can't believe how irrational and cruel some posters are being. Yes this Mom has had a history of rants and problems on this forum but to claim her son's mental illness is her fault for not taking responsibility and her husbands fault for working hard is beyond comprehension.

As as an adoptive Mom I won't even go into how offensive it is to even ask if the kid is biological or adopted. Believe me, if this kid was adopted older than an infant, this Mom would have definitely told us. But that poster didn't even ask if he was adopted as an older than infant child. She just wants to know if he is adopted. You have so much to learn.
I'm out of here. The cruel, unintelligent, and bizarre comments to this mother have taken soo much energy and time to deal with.

To the OP. I wish you well. Don't listen to the idiots on here who don't know what they are talking about and want to throw you under the bus.

There's no need to be so sanctimonious. People have genuine concerns and are free to express them. The OP has mentioned in several other posts that both her children are adopted. People have been subject to very disturbing things posted in the past by the OP.

It is not everybody else's fault that she posted these things previously, and that people remember them. If she has a reason for her posts being so bizarre in the past that's just now come to light then so be it. I, personally, am not able to take the in new info without some skepticism. Sorry if that offends you, but that doesn't make me an idiot, nor cruel.
 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:35 PM
 
Location: here
24,477 posts, read 28,773,973 times
Reputation: 31056
Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryleeII View Post
He does get in trouble at school. They send him to ISS (in school suspension), they have expelled him several times, and have sent him to alternative shcools. See, I'm not the only one who's exhausted their resources without much results.
you can't get expelled several times. You get expelled once, then you have to go to a different school.
 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:37 PM
 
Location: WI
2,820 posts, read 3,067,614 times
Reputation: 4815
Quote:
Originally Posted by rkb0305 View Post
you can't get expelled several times. You get expelled once, then you have to go to a different school.
Glad I'm not the only one who wondered about this. Marylee, did you mean to use the word suspension or......?
 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:39 PM
 
Location: here
24,477 posts, read 28,773,973 times
Reputation: 31056
125 posts and the bottom line is still - we do not know the circumstances, the whole story, the OP, or her son, and can not help her. Sorry, but we can't. There is too much to the story that is missing to give any real advice.
 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:46 PM
 
Location: somewhere
4,264 posts, read 7,937,996 times
Reputation: 3129
Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
I can't believe how irrational and cruel some posters are being. Yes this Mom has had a history of rants and problems on this forum but to claim her son's mental illness is her fault for not taking responsibility and her husbands fault for working hard is beyond comprehension.

As as an adoptive Mom I won't even go into how offensive it is to even ask if the kid is biological or adopted. Believe me, if this kid was adopted older than an infant, this Mom would have definitely told us. But that poster didn't even ask if he was adopted as an older than infant child. She just wants to know if he is adopted. You have so much to learn.
I'm out of here. The cruel, unintelligent, and bizarre comments to this mother have taken soo much energy and time to deal with.

To the OP. I wish you well. Don't listen to the idiots on here who don't know what they are talking about and want to throw you under the bus.
Yes, I do want to know if the child was adopted, it is a well known fact that babies of crack Mom's grow up with issues, that is exactly why I asked. This in no way makes me cruel, unintelligent or an idiot. Why should it be offensive if someone asks if a child is adopted???????
 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:49 PM
 
Location: SELA
532 posts, read 877,135 times
Reputation: 227
People generally don't like being imprisoned against their will...
 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:50 PM
 
Location: In a house
13,258 posts, read 34,677,768 times
Reputation: 20198
I think it's cruel and irrational for people to come to this forum, tell extraordinary stories of heartbreak and horror, involve lots of well-meaning, kind-hearted souls who want only to help, say "I CAN'T..." involve people even further into the drama, disappear after enough people catch on, and then show up a couple weeks later with the next episode guaranteed to suck the kindhearted people back down again.
 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:53 PM
 
Location: somewhere
4,264 posts, read 7,937,996 times
Reputation: 3129
Quote:
Originally Posted by LeavingMassachusetts View Post
One of the idiots here. Also an adopted child as an infant.

You all want to believe her stories and feel bad, go right ahead. Maybe there is some truth to it. I know Hopes, BeachMel and DewDrop and many more are wonderful women who only have good in their heart and want to help people. I am a nice person but I am also quite cynical.

The only system I see clearly that has failed is the system that allowed her to adopt her children in the first place. I have never, ever in my life seen someone say things about their children so full of hate. She has not had just hate filled rants about her son but her daughter too. Mothers don't say those things, disturbed child or not.

I guarantee that child gets out of her house, he will be better off. Hopefully he comes back and gets his sister too.
I to am very cynical and the whole story is not being told here. I never knew I would get reemed for asking if a child was adopted, alot of time adoptive parents don't know what kids went through before they came to their home, or what kind of pregnancy the birth mother had that could possibly affect the child later in life.

You are right, looking back over her posts she has verbalized some really hateful things about her children, this is actually a very sad situation.
 
Old 03-04-2011, 04:59 PM
 
1,302 posts, read 1,531,080 times
Reputation: 1916
Quote:
Originally Posted by ajzjmsmom View Post
I to am very cynical and the whole story is not being told here. I never knew I would get reemed for asking if a child was adopted, alot of time adoptive parents don't know what kids went through before they came to their home, or what kind of pregnancy the birth mother had that could possibly affect the child later in life.

You are right, looking back over her posts she has verbalized some really hateful things about her children, this is actually a very sad situation.
Believe it or not, there is still a lot of ignorance associated with adoption. I have seen it first hand. There have been plenty of times when I have mentioned that I was adopted and you would have thought I had a whale shoot out of my butt.

Some people get defensive about it because the ignorance is tiresome. I just point out that my parents wanted me more than their parents wanted them. They waited 3 years for me, so they obviously loved me more
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