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Old 03-23-2011, 11:19 AM
Location: east coast
250 posts, read 805,349 times
Reputation: 327


Originally Posted by Mattie View Post
When I used to hire a babysitter, I tried to make the night special for my kids. They would have a meal not usually on the menu, such as pizza or fast food, and I'd pick up a movie for them to watch before bedtime. I expected the babysitter to get them to bed at a reasonable hour, but wasn't too worried if they stayed up later than usual.

I have a good friend who insists her children be put to bed at the usual time (by 7:00), and is having a lot of trouble getting anyone to come back to sit a second time. Another friend with a daughter of babysitting age tells me her girl won't go back to this house, but she is reluctant to say why, and just makes excuses.

Friend #1 has three under the age of 5. If the kids won't stay in bed, the sitters are instructed to lock their doors(from the outside) to keep them in their room. If she gets a bad report on any of them, they will be spanked upon her return. But, nobody wants to be the mean babysitter who puts all that in motion, so instead, they say no if asked to sit again.

What do you expect from your sitters? I think my friend is asking too much of the teens she hires. Otherwise, although I don't believe in spanking, she is a wonderful, loving mother.
well I am totally against spanking personally, or locking doors or any of that... but everyone has their own expectations.

For us it's simple. I do as much as I can before leaving my children (2 boys). I usually have them showered, cleaned, (more or less) fed, house is clean. I leave a couple new activities (maybe) and bring out a dvd they haven't seen in awhile and allow them to have some snack of their choice. I make my sitters have a nice night so they'll want to come back. I dont let the kids stay up later, I still have them go to bed on time but they do that without fuss most of the time. I also pay my sitters well. You take care of the people who work for you. I don't hire teens though, my sitters have been college age or older (up to 25 yo), mainly education or nursing students.
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Old 03-23-2011, 11:27 AM
1,017 posts, read 1,694,811 times
Reputation: 3894
The first mom in the OP's story is a nut job. You should never have someone else "discipline" your children by locking them in their room. Really? Some relative stranger locks you in your room when your parents aren't home and you're not even five years old? I wouldn't let my daughters babysit for her if those were the rules and I'd love to tell her why.
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Old 03-23-2011, 05:22 PM
12,932 posts, read 19,824,518 times
Reputation: 33989
An update. The mother in the OP is on vacation and others in the neighborhood have been helping the grandparents out. As it turns out, the grandmother is the cause of the strict discipline. Another woman babysat for several hours this past week. She said the twins really can get out of control, but she could not bring herself to lock the bedroom doors. The mother truly is a loving parent, but HER mother is controlling.

I check on these kids frequently. I don't think they are abused at all, I just hate the doors being locked. I know my own would have freaked out if I tried that.
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Old 03-24-2011, 06:47 AM
Location: In a house
13,258 posts, read 34,677,768 times
Reputation: 20198
We didn't even HAVE locks on our bedroom doors. The only place we had locks at all, were the bathroom doors and the doors to the outside of the house. And both were locks to keep people from coming IN, not to keep people from getting out. Even my parents' bedroom door didn't lock from the inside. And lock from the OUTSIDE to keep people inside from leaving? That's insanity. This entire concept is totally foreign to me.
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