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Old 04-06-2011, 08:40 PM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
6,190 posts, read 7,969,244 times
Reputation: 3325

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Quote:
Originally Posted by calgirlinnc View Post
There are probably a fair number of soccer moms, ballet moms, karate moms, tennis moms, etc., here on the parenting forum.

Um, just sayin'.

Give people a chance. Just today I was having to tell my son to not judge people by their exterior, but to look at the person inside. Maybe you need to do the same?

When I was younger, I made friends with women much older than myself and they were blessings to me.
While its great to have people who are older in your life, I need friends, people who will go out drinking with me,go see movies with me, go do 21 year old things together, not someone who can't because they have children and that phase of their life is over.
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Old 04-06-2011, 08:56 PM
 
Location: In a George Strait Song
9,546 posts, read 7,065,457 times
Reputation: 14046
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
While its great to have people who are older in your life, I need friends, people who will go out drinking with me,go see movies with me, go do 21 year old things together, not someone who can't because they have children and that phase of their life is over.
I have children. I still go to the movies, and I still have drinks out.

I understand you want friends your own age, and that is great, nothing wrong with that. But you can have all kinds of friendly contact with people who you may not initially think you have anything in common with.

If you open yourself up to other people in small ways, even soccer moms at the grocery store, you will find it is easier for you to open up to people in bigger ways, and you will not have to cry yourself to sleep at night.
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Old 04-06-2011, 10:13 PM
 
4,040 posts, read 7,438,047 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by calgirlinnc View Post
I flat out absolutely positively would not want to live without my Ipod.
The definition of an addiction?...
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Old 04-06-2011, 10:32 PM
 
6,066 posts, read 15,042,133 times
Reputation: 7188
It's not as if a woman's life is over once she becomes a mother. We're not living in some third world country or America in the 1950's.

I love my "me time" or "adult time" away from the kids and family. Parenting is hard work - you gotta take a breather now and then so you can do the job well. It's also important not to lose yourself in the role of "mom" or "dad" and forget what makes you happy outside of the world of your children and spouse and all that. Taking a step outside and putting yourself in different situations also helps you realize what's so important about being a parent, and keeps you inspired to keep doing your best at it. Sometimes I even put myself in situations where I think I might not be comfortable, because I know that allowing yourself to get too comfortable in life can have it's negative side-effects. It's good to step outside of your comfort zone. You learn a lot more that way.

Some of my most encouraging moments since becoming a mother, the moments that really made me happy at the choice I made to even become a parent at all, were spent away from my kids and husband. I was in a club or bar having drinks with two single younger girlfriends who were unmarried and childless. I know it might sound crazy, but those moments were incredibly insightful and really made me realize I was doing exactly what I needed to be doing with my life and that I wouldn't change a thing about it. I felt lucky, and went home refreshed and re-energized and excited about my most important role, among my many, as "mom".
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Old 04-07-2011, 07:11 AM
 
Location: In a George Strait Song
9,546 posts, read 7,065,457 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by syracusa View Post
The definition of an addiction?...

Re my Ipod.....

So?


It damages no one, least of all you.

Also, it has been pointed out repeatedly in the last 10 pages, that Ipods are not the same as all other current electronic devices, in that they are the current medium for MUSIC, in as much as walkmans, stereos, and record players have previously been the current medium for music. Ipods and Blackberrys are not the same thing.

In my post, I clearly state that I use my Ipod to connect to my stereo to listen to MUSIC and to listen to books.

Can a person be addicted to music? If so, then yes, I am "addicted" to Chris Botti (jazz trumpeter) and Yo Yo Ma and Maroon 5 and the Glee cast. As well as all the excellent books I listen to from Audible. And if I AM addicted to music and books, I do not want to go into recovery! Lump me in there with Thomas Jefferson--a life without books (and music!) is no life at all.

Last edited by calgirlinnc; 04-07-2011 at 07:24 AM..
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Old 04-07-2011, 10:17 PM
 
6,066 posts, read 15,042,133 times
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Just finally got the book today - thanks to the OP hutch5 for starting this thread!
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Old 04-08-2011, 03:59 AM
 
Location: UK
2,579 posts, read 2,450,929 times
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You are welcome, I hope you find the book informative. I certainly learned a lot from it, not least to look at my own addictions.
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Old 04-08-2011, 04:46 AM
 
28,164 posts, read 25,289,646 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
Most places I go, like the grocery store, whatever, I don't want to talk to any of those people, do people my age frequent the grocery store, sorry but I am not looking to buddy buddy with the soccer moms, when I go out to the bar I will chat with people, when I go places I know people my age will be going, I don't mind talking to someone who catches my interest but its all work/stress and no fun for me, I come home after work and cry myself to sleep, the places I do go don't hold great potential for friend making.
You don't have to be buddy buddy with people. But a smile and a little conversation can be a good thing. God, I'd hate it if I never talked to people besides the ones I already know. That seems depressing....
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Old 04-08-2011, 04:49 AM
 
28,164 posts, read 25,289,646 times
Reputation: 16665
Quote:
Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
While its great to have people who are older in your life, I need friends, people who will go out drinking with me,go see movies with me, go do 21 year old things together, not someone who can't because they have children and that phase of their life is over.
Wow. You are just full of inaccurate assumptions and know it all attitude, aren't you?

If you "need friends" put down your cell phone and TALK TO HUMANS FACE TO FACE. If you "need friends" stop being so assumptive and picky.

Newsflash: Us old people with children still have a social life that doesn't revolve around our kids 24/7. Just because we aren't doing body shots off of each other and grinding on the opposite sex at some seedy club doesn't mean that we don't go out.
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Old 04-08-2011, 04:50 AM
 
28,164 posts, read 25,289,646 times
Reputation: 16665
I cannot believe listening to music and reading books are being looked at as bad because of the way in which people do so.
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