Since when are parents supposed to pay for college? (playing, grandmother, mother)

[beachmel]

Originally Posted by Garfunkle524

I'm a strong believer in the fact that not a single person in the world is entitled to anything. That being said, there is a distinct irresponsibility taking place when the parents can't give their child a single dime toward their college education. I've known many many students whose parents helped pay for college and most of them are incredibly grateful for that (especially after meeting someone who has to deal with student loan debt or work themself silly just to afford their degree that they have no time to study for because they are always working.) There are also a few that do feel entitled and take advantage of their parents all the time. I would also argue that if the child does not realize the value of things given to them, that's also a result of questionable parenting.

In some cases, this is true...however, some people are simply born with that attitude.

[Garfunkle524]

Originally Posted by beachmel

[/b][/u]In some cases, this is true...however, some people are simply born with that attitude.

Agreed. That's why parents gotta learn'em the value of hard work and earning their keep. If they don't learn they're going to have a hard time cutting it in the real world.

[drjones96]

Originally Posted by Katiana

I think you should be proud of what you did.

My dad wouldn't fill out financial aid forms, either. His excuse was that he knew he made too much money. This was unlikely to be true, as he was an engineer and my mom was a SAHM. Many colleges require that form to be filled out to consider you for any financial aid, not just need-based. But he didn't understand that.

In any event, there is no legal requirement for parents to pay for college. However, I think it's just part of some people's culture that it's something they should do, if possible. I think parents who don't save for college, then expect to get need-based financial aid, are trying to pull a fast one. Fortunately for the rest of us, their kids usually get to take out more loans, rather than getting direct aid.

My folks filled out the forms....said they made too much money....yep....they were right. No low income related grants for me.

But I did get quite a few merrit based scholorships. And I got my first few years of tuition paid because I could play a mean trombone.

[hlsess]

Originally Posted by Kevin from Tampa

I am going to say something that will tick some people off, but what the hell...

if you willfully do not save money to put your kids through college, you are not completely filling your parental duties.

If you can't afford ANYTHING...in other words, if you live in a house that you can barely afford, and aren't living above your means, and you still can't afford to save anything for college...OK...fine. I get that and I know that there are people in this position.

I also don't think a parent should go in to debt to put their kids through college...but if you've been saving all along, that wouldn't be an issue.

Now... if you lead an otherwise normal, middle-class or higher existence, and aren't saving anything for your kids' college education....you have not done right by them.

This is not about spoiling your kids, or teaching them a lesson, or whatever...it's about properly preparing them for life.

My wife and I have saved money to put both of our kids through college, but we've also required them to save their whole lives as well. We will have saved enough to pay for 4 years tuition, fees, and one year of room/board. They will have saved enough to pay for books, 2-3 years of room/board, and we will have them work part time to pay for incidentals, and any other room/board expenses we don't cover.

To absolutely say it's not your responsibility at all? That sounds like something said by someone who doesn't want to sacrifice for their kids.

Maybe there is more to this...as someone above in this thread said, it used to be one of the marks of the middle class that you could afford to send your kids to college. Maybe that is becoming less and less possible....?

Either way...put SOMETHING away.

WELL SAID!!
When you have kids- you know that they are going to need a college education so why would you NOT save!!
I am very fortunate that My D has a merit scholarship and a prepaid plan so I will only owe half of the tuition (about $20,000) which is a great deal since that' s what it costs to go to the state schools with everything included-her school is a small LAC!

[drjones96]

Originally Posted by hlsess

When you have kids- you know that they are going to need a college education so why would you NOT save!!

...not everyone goes to college (you hope all your kids do but lets be realistic). Either way it's going to be expensive to launch that boat.

[Katiana]

Originally Posted by drjones96

My folks filled out the forms....said they made too much money....yep....they were right. No low income related grants for me.

But I did get quite a few merrit based scholorships. And I got my first few years of tuition paid because I could play a mean trombone.

At most colleges you have to fill out the forms to qualify for any aid, not just need based, at least for the first year. Then if you get a merit scholarship, you don't have to do the FAFSA again.

[TheKiwi]

I consider myself VERY lucky because my parents saved my whole life to send me to college and my sister as well. I left college with 0 debt and am extremely grateful for it. I know not all parents can afford to do so. My boyfriend's family wasn't able to save any money for him to go to college and he has 5 years of student debt. He is still years from paying it off and I know it takes a toll on his finances because it's very hard for him to save any money.

Because of what my parents did for me, I know I will do the same for my children someday because it was such a wonderful gift that I will never take for granted. If you can afford to save money for college for your children, do it.

[beachmel]

Originally Posted by TheKiwi

I consider myself VERY lucky because my parents saved my whole life to send me to college and my sister as well. I left college with 0 debt and am extremely grateful for it. I know not all parents can afford to do so. My boyfriend's family wasn't able to save any money for him to go to college and he has 5 years of student debt. He is still years from paying it off and I know it takes a toll on his finances because it's very hard for him to save any money.

Because of what my parents did for me, I know I will do the same for my children someday because it was such a wonderful gift that I will never take for granted. If you can afford to save money for college for your children, do it.

Yes, IF parents have the kind of income which allows them to save money for their children's education, it can be very nice for their children. What some people do fail to realize though, is this....your boyfriend has 5 years of student debt. He is still years from paying it off. However, he has many more "earnable" years ahead of him. That debt is no smaller for the parents who are paying for their children's college education, IF they were unable to save for it. Some of these parents are guilted into going into debt at a time in their lives when they should be having a bit more money to "play" with, because their children are out of the home. Consequently, what some young people don't understand is this...(since it's tax time and all)....when your kids move out of the home, you can't claim them as tax deductions. Conseqently, if they are handing out their income, on children they are no longer able to claim as dependents on their income tax return...for all practical purposes, that money being shelled out on their kids is "frivolous" spending. Less dependents=more taxes withheld and no income tax return the following year. Not only are parents handing out the money that they are/have working/worked for, but they're being taxed on that money as well.

When you're raising a family....most of us barely make ends meet. You're taxi-ing kids around, paying for food, medical, clothing, housing, doing home repairs (if you have one), etc. You're looking forward to the day when they're out on their own, so you can take a vacation, do those upgrades on your home, help your kids with their homes or whatever else they need help with...you want the opportunity to do a few things that you just "want" to do, with your money....not things that you "have" to do with it. You want to put some money aside (FINALLY) toward your retirement, so that you are NOT a burden to your children...so that you can continue to live in your own home....not become a burden to society and/or forced to live off of your piddly social security income.

I couldn't live with myself if I was so hell bent on not incurring debt, that I forced my parents to do so. Debt is debt.....why should your parents go into debt for something that YOU are going to benefit from? They're not going to be the ones earning from your college education. Again, if they've been fortunate to have the kind of income which allowed them to put money aside FOR that college education, fine...but not all are quite as fortunate.

[Garfunkle524]

Originally Posted by beachmel

Yes, IF parents have the kind of income which allows them to save money for their children's education, it can be very nice for their children. What some people do fail to realize though, is this....your boyfriend has 5 years of student debt. He is still years from paying it off. However, he has many more "earnable" years ahead of him. That debt is no smaller for the parents who are paying for their children's college education, IF they were unable to save for it. Some of these parents are guilted into going into debt at a time in their lives when they should be having a bit more money to "play" with, because their children are out of the home. Consequently, what some young people don't understand is this...(since it's tax time and all)....when your kids move out of the home, you can't claim them as tax deductions. Conseqently, if they are handing out their income, on children they are no longer able to claim as dependents on their income tax return...for all practical purposes, that money being shelled out on their kids is "frivolous" spending. Less dependents=more taxes withheld and no income tax return the following year. Not only are parents handing out the money that they are/have working/worked for, but they're being taxed on that money as well.

When you're raising a family....most of us barely make ends meet. You're taxi-ing kids around, paying for food, medical, clothing, housing, doing home repairs (if you have one), etc. You're looking forward to the day when they're out on their own, so you can take a vacation, do those upgrades on your home, help your kids with their homes or whatever else they need help with...you want the opportunity to do a few things that you just "want" to do, with your money....not things that you "have" to do with it. You want to put some money aside (FINALLY) toward your retirement, so that you are NOT a burden to your children...so that you can continue to live in your own home....not become a burden to society and/or forced to live off of your piddly social security income.

I couldn't live with myself if I was so hell bent on not incurring debt, that I forced my parents to do so. Debt is debt.....why should your parents go into debt for something that YOU are going to benefit from? They're not going to be the ones earning from your college education. Again, if they've been fortunate to have the kind of income which allowed them to put money aside FOR that college education, fine...but not all are quite as fortunate.

You make a very good point. However, I have to disagree a bit. If parents can't put away 10 dollars a week for college, how can they afford to have any sort of reserve for emergencies or any other reason? I volunteer at an animal shelter and we get people that come in who can't afford $3 a week for cat food at the discount store. Hard times have been hitting people a lot and we all know that, but if you have a cat you can afford $3 a week for food. Maybe that's not the best comparison but hopefully it gets my point across.

Parents should not have to pay for the child's full college bill, but it is their responsibility to do everything they can to help their kids get the best start possible out of college if their child wants to attend. That's part of what you sign up for when you become a parent. Some graduates (myself included) are crushed by debt for 5 years or more regardless of how great a job we can get out of school. That pushes every significant financial decision (buying a car, house, saving for retirement, building a rainy day fund etc) back 5+ years (in my case probably around 7 or 8). If my parents had even saved $1000 over the 18 years before I went to college (which would be very easy) then savings when I graduated would have been WELL worth it, even for such a relatively small amount.

And by the way, student loan interest is tax deductible.

[markg91359]

And by the way, student loan interest is tax deductible.

We've kicked around ad nauseam whether parents ought to help their kids out with college expenses or not. I doubt very few opinions have been changed.

For those who want to help their kids, remember this: You may get some help from Uncle Sam if you pay some of your children's college expenses.

I am not an accountant. But the general rule seems to be that taxpayers filing jointly with an income of less than a certain amount may be entitled to a tax credit of up to $2,000 or 20% of the actual amount they spend on tuition and other expenses. The tax credit is phased out at a certain income level. However, any married couple earning an adjusted gross income of less than $160,000 is entitled to a tax deduction for the same expenses. The deduction is up to $4,000 for couples earning $130,000 or less and $2,000 for couples earning between $130,000 and $160,000.

You might want to see this article.


Answers About Education Tax Credits and Deductions: Part 1 - NYTimes.com

Oh, and you may get a break on your state income taxes as well, if your state has an income tax.