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Old 03-15-2011, 06:06 AM
 
Location: Somewhere out there...
3,653 posts, read 7,260,891 times
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We recently moved to the next town over, we found a great deal on bigger home, which was much needed. The homes prices in our town were getting very high, to pricey to afford the space we needed. We decided to let the kids finish out the year at their school and transfer next year. The problem is, that my kids are very attached to their friends and the former neighborhood. I feel so bad that they have to change schools, I could probably keep them in the same school forever and drive them but that presents other problems. We live in an area of older style homes in a quiet secluded area and we noticed that most of the neighbors are older original owners. Their kids are grown and moved on, I have not seen any kids with in a 3 block area. When we moved here it was in December and we couldn't tell that there were not any kids in the area. There is a home daycare around the corner, which looked like kids lived there, and there are several homes with swingsets, come to find out people leave there swingsets up, even after their kids grow up. lol. Anyway, I don't know what to do, they miss their friends and old neighborhood where kids were everywhere and now they have no kids around. One of my son's is in middle school, so that makes it harder. Meeting new kids at this age can be more difficult. Sometimes I think if we moved further away, it would have been better, at least they wouldn't have to see the area they had to move from.The main shopping area was in that town so we run into our old neighbors quite often and we have to drive past the old city to get to the new one. It's like dangling a treat, just out of their reach. We all love the new house, the kids have their own room, which they wanted for a long time and there is room to move around. There are alot of positives and negatives in this situation. What would you do?
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Old 03-15-2011, 06:14 AM
 
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How old are they? Perhaps playdates? Sleepovers? Give it time and make a real effort to immerse them in the new area and school activities. Children make friends quickly. Also if you are in a northern area once it begins warming up - things pick up activity wise.

Just saw you are from MN. We moved from FL - so I understand transitioning kids - the first year we had the kids back and forth 4 times and they spent a few weeks with friends in summer and a few friends came here. Once it warms up - and its getting there - I hope it will get better!
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Old 03-15-2011, 06:33 AM
 
Location: Somewhere out there...
3,653 posts, read 7,260,891 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StilltheSame View Post
How old are they? Perhaps playdates? Sleepovers? Give it time and make a real effort to immerse them in the new area and school activities. Children make friends quickly. Also if you are in a northern area once it begins warming up - things pick up activity wise.

Just saw you are from MN. We moved from FL - so I understand transitioning kids - the first year we had the kids back and forth 4 times and they spent a few weeks with friends in summer and a few friends came here. Once it warms up - and its getting there - I hope it will get better!
My 12 year old son is feeling it the most, we have had his friends sleep over a few times and he still goes over their homes. Now that its warming up, he is feeling the loss, him and his friends would walk to the store and around the neighborhood, hanging out. Its not the same driving 5 miles to drop him off and spontaneously hanging out withing the kids in the neighborhood.
I'm hoping kids are just "hibernating" around here and they will "wake up" soon.
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Old 03-15-2011, 08:49 AM
 
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They'll make friends in their new school. Maybe sign them up for some out of school activity like dance or baseball. You have a community center?
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Old 03-16-2011, 02:30 PM
 
Location: NC
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part of the problem is you have them in their old school. nothing like a constant reminder to rub salt in the wounds.

getting them in the correct school and immersed in new activities with new friends will solve much of the problem. the old friends can come spend the night or vice versa.
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Old 03-16-2011, 02:55 PM
 
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Good point, suedonym. Staying in the old school prevents them from making friends in their new school district.
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Old 03-16-2011, 09:08 PM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
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as soon as they start making friends in their new school, they will lose interest in their old friends. They just won't have much in common anymore. In exchange for the new bigger house they will have to learn to adjust to a new school.

I hope this was discussed with them before the move. I think you are doing them a dis service by keeping them in their old school. They are in limbo right now, not entirely in either neighborhood. I hope you have looked into activities in their new community so they can make new friends over the summer, if you don't decide to put them in the proper school.
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Old 03-17-2011, 07:51 AM
 
Location: Somewhere out there...
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I know, we talked about it pretty much everyday. They "begged" us not to change scools until the year was over and we agreed, its harder to come into a new school half way through the year. They will start in the fall in the new school, they'll have too, or they wont meet any kids around here.
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Old 03-17-2011, 08:31 AM
 
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Summer is going to be even worse because they won't have a chance to meet local kids until they switch schools.

You really need to sign them up for summer activities in your new area. Summer softball, soccer, etc.

That's the only way they will have a chance to make new friends in the summer.

Whatever you do, don't allow them to continue with summer activities (sports, etc.) in the old school district.

It will make the transition to the new school easier if they get to know some students during the summer via their sports and activities.

That way they will look forward to going to their new school because they will know a few kids ahead of time.
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Old 04-10-2011, 10:04 AM
 
Location: Somewhere out there...
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Today its so nice out and the kids came out of hibernation! There are kids in this neighborhood after all!
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