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I really wish you would. It's sad that you are making a huge life decision like this and resisting an opportunity to fully understand the possible consequences.
No offense but you act like you know everything about me and you don't have a clue.
No...it doesn't complete it. You can stop shoving your narrow views on me.
And I am not your friend. I don't have student loans or any debt and my savings account keeps growing as we speak. And maybe it didn't occur to you that I might already have a man who is more than willing to donate his sperm. That cuts the cost down significantly. I have also considered adoption as well. A toddler perhaps.
You have this narrow view in your head that a woman MUST have a man to feel complete. I am sorry but I do not prescribe to that narrow view of the mom and dad with the 2.5 kids and the house in the suburbs. I know. It must be shocking to realize that not everyone thinks the same way about family as you do.
You need to get out and see the world a bit and appreciate that families come in many forms. Some have two parents while some have one. Some have two moms, two dads or one mom and one dad. It doesn't make one family more or less superior and it saddens me that there are so many closeminded people in the world. I know a woman who adopted my best friend and she did an amazing job. The girl is in school and she is growing into a wonderful young woman and she didn't have a father. Her mom adopted her as a single woman and did it with less money and support than what I have. I know of plenty of women who choose to adopt or have children without a father and it isn't a major catastrophe that you and everyone else want to make it out to be.
I was going to stay out of this one, but my goodness madam, this is one of the most arrogant posts I've ever seen on this forum, and that's saying something.
Nobody's saying you need a man to feel "complete". I don't think that that's the case, and neither does any other woman on here. The point that you keep missing is that the act of making and nurturing a child is very difficult with all of the responsibility and burden on ONE person. Regardless of how they got to that point, planned or not.
Yes, people make it work. You might make it work. Nobody can stop you. But you won't even ACKNOWLEDGE the potential pitfalls. If your baby is special needs, or Down Syndrome, or has severe ADD or is Autistic, and needs full time care by his/her mother, and your mother dies, how are you going to look after the child? You have to at least ACKNOWLEDGE and prepare for the various scenarios that could pop up that are extremely challenging when all of the responsibility falls on YOU.
Plus, you have issues regarding men. What are you going to teach your child in this aspect? What happens when your daughter wants to date, or what happens when your son grows into a man? How are you going to handle not passing on your neuroses to your child? Have you even thought about that?
What motivates anyone to have a child? Wanting one.
The truth of the matter is that it has a heck of a lot more to do with the person than the situation of single or married. Some people are good parents. Some people are ****ty parents.
People have kids for selfish reasons, single or not. Some have kids to save relationship and I find that to be far worse than having a kid single.
No offense but you act like you know everything about me and you don't have a clue.
No offense to you but I do recall you were the person who did disclose your mental health issues in not just one but two threads which is available for the public to see.
So how can one not take that into consideration when you are considering to be a single parent by choice?
It amazes me how hostile your posts become when one does not agree with what you are doing or just provides friendly advice.
You need to get out and see the world a bit and appreciate that families come in many forms.
May I ask how much of the world YOU have seen? I don't mean by watching TV or seeing movies or reading books. How many countries and cultures have YOU experienced? I've travelled all over the world. (In fact, several of the posters responding to you have travelled widely.) It's given me a few insights as, I'm sure, it has them. Perhaps you would like to hear them and compare them with your own?
Last edited by DewDropInn; 12-09-2011 at 08:13 AM..
I was going to stay out of this one, but my goodness madam, this is one of the most arrogant posts I've ever seen on this forum, and that's saying something.
Nobody's saying you need a man to feel "complete". I don't think that that's the case, and neither does any other woman on here. The point that you keep missing is that the act of making and nurturing a child is very difficult with all of the responsibility and burden on ONE person. Regardless of how they got to that point, planned or not.
Yes, people make it work. You might make it work. Nobody can stop you. But you won't even ACKNOWLEDGE the potential pitfalls. If your baby is special needs, or Down Syndrome, or has severe ADD or is Autistic, and needs full time care by his/her mother, and your mother dies, how are you going to look after the child? You have to at least ACKNOWLEDGE and prepare for the various scenarios that could pop up that are extremely challenging when all of the responsibility falls on YOU.
Plus, you have issues regarding men. What are you going to teach your child in this aspect? What happens when your daughter wants to date, or what happens when your son grows into a man? How are you going to handle not passing on your neuroses to your child? Have you even thought about that?
All the questions you have Finster are the ones I have as well.
How you are as a person and how you are as a parent reflects to the child.
Meh. You have no idea what you are talking about. Once I have that job, my mom will retire. She is just as excited about a grandma and has told me that if I provide, she will have no problem providing for free daycare for me and my brother. I plan to live with my mom and help her so she isn't working in her sixties. She loves babies and says she wants to be a grandma by fifty five.
So you can shove it.
Well that's nice....you did ask and now you're dissing every answer that disagrees with you...even ones that give you some really good things to think about. A mature person would be interested in all kinds of thoughts on the matter...would want to consider everything carefully...instead of simply thinking of what they want. Food for thought anyway.
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