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I can tell you that if I did what you did, quit school, I'd have to do more than work to live at home. They'd have charged me rent. Maybe our families have different ideas about what "doing something with your life" means. Working at wal mart wouldn't have cut it for my parents.
So, are you waiting for you mom to say "get out"?
She said wouldn't have even asked to spend the night at her boyfriends.
And I have a better job now, I took whatever I could at the time to make money and pay my bills.
And I clean my room, I go grocery shopping for my mom, I pay my own bills, I drive my brother places if my mom has the car.
And no I am waiting till I get some money together.
But I am 22, I am not putting my life on hold just because I can't afford to move out. I just spent the best night with TG and we had so much fun and I wouldn't have been able to do so if I wasn't allowed to sleep away from the house.
In the beginning I never told my mom where I was going, just sleeping at a friends house, he lives close enough I can walk to his place from my mom's or I would bike. I don't know how she came to know where I was going but she never made a big deal out of.
She's not a bad parent for allowing it and I'm not a bad kid for taking advantage of her allowing it.
Guys, I smile when I think about him, just hearing his voice on the phone can make my day, I hate being alone at night, if that was taken from me, I really would be depressed.
But I am 22, I am not putting my life on hold just because I can't afford to move out. I just spent the best night with TG and we had so much fun and I wouldn't have been able to do so if I wasn't allowed to sleep away from the house.
In the beginning I never told my mom where I was going, just sleeping at a friends house, he lives close enough I can walk to his place from my mom's or I would bike. I don't know how she came to know where I was going but she never made a big deal out of.
She's not a bad parent for allowing it and I'm not a bad kid for taking advantage of her allowing it.
Guys, I smile when I think about him, just hearing his voice on the phone can make my day, I hate being alone at night, if that was taken from me, I really would be depressed.
But I am 22, I am not putting my life on hold just because I can't afford to move out. I just spent the best night with TG and we had so much fun and I wouldn't have been able to do so if I wasn't allowed to sleep away from the house.
That's in in a nutshell. You just want to do what makes you happy. You want to play house and party with your boyfriend before you have the cash and the income to actually set up house and be an independent adult with responsibilities.
BTW: I've been asking around. This is not common at ALL "in my area".
That's in in a nutshell. You just want to do what makes you happy. You want to play house and party with your boyfriend before you have the cash and the income to actually set up house and be an independent adult with responsibilities.
BTW: I've been asking around. This is not common at ALL "in my area".
Ok, its common in my group of friends.
And I wouldn't say it was playing house but its spending quality time with him and developing a relationship.
I wouldn't say it was playing house but its spending quality time with him and developing a relationship.
Okey dokey. That's kind of an interesting justification but back to the original question. The expectation for the adult child in my house is... are you ready?
My house, my rules.
If the adult child doesn't like them he/she can move out. Pronto.
She said wouldn't have even asked to spend the night at her boyfriends.
And I have a better job now, I took whatever I could at the time to make money and pay my bills.
And I clean my room, I go grocery shopping for my mom, I pay my own bills, I drive my brother places if my mom has the car.
And no I am waiting till I get some money together.
But I am 22, I am not putting my life on hold just because I can't afford to move out. I just spent the best night with TG and we had so much fun and I wouldn't have been able to do so if I wasn't allowed to sleep away from the house.
In the beginning I never told my mom where I was going, just sleeping at a friends house, he lives close enough I can walk to his place from my mom's or I would bike. I don't know how she came to know where I was going but she never made a big deal out of.
She's not a bad parent for allowing it and I'm not a bad kid for taking advantage of her allowing it.
Guys, I smile when I think about him, just hearing his voice on the phone can make my day, I hate being alone at night, if that was taken from me, I really would be depressed.
You ARE really depressed!!!!!
I'll be totally honest, back in the dark ages of the early 1990's I spent the night at my BF's while living at my parents I alternated between living at home and living in the sorority house in college, I didn't move out permanently until I was almost 24. But I was taking a full load of classes and working the whole time. This didn't happen until about 4 years into college, after my sister had gone away to school. I think my parents realized she was 4 years younger and they had no control over what she was doing. They lightened up on me a bit. Plus, it isn't all about the statistics of it (how old I was, what I was paying for etc. vs how old you are, what you are paying for) It is about the attitude. I didn't hate my parents. I appreciated the fact that they were helping me get through college by letting me live for free. I knew I HAD to stay in school or all bets were off. I knew living with them was not the same as living on my own, and I understood why. I didn't constantly complain about them, and beg to be treated like an adult. I wasn't an adult. I wasn't 100% paying my own way. I was enjoying college life, which included going out. It was a 6-year long process to get me from an 18 yo freshman to a 24 yo college graduate paying my own way. I didn't have any illusion that the date on the calendar somehow made me an adult, and meant everyone should treat me that way.
AND, I had a BOYFRIEND! I wasn't spending the night with some non-committal guy!
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I alternated between living at home and living in the sorority house in college, I didn't move out permanently until I was almost 24. But I was taking a full load of classes and working the whole time. This didn't happen until about 4 years into college, after my sister had gone away to school. I think my parents realized she was 4 years younger and they had no control over what she was doing. They lightened up on me a bit. Plus, it isn't all about the statistics of it (how old I was, what I was paying for etc. vs how old you are, what you are paying for) It is about the attitude. I didn't hate my parents. I appreciated the fact that they were helping me get through college by letting me live for free. I knew I HAD to stay in school or all bets were off. I knew living with them was not the same as living on my own, and I understood why. I didn't constantly complain about them, and beg to be treated like an adult. I wasn't an adult. I wasn't 100% paying my own way. I was enjoying college life, which included going out. It was a 6-year long process to get me from an 18 yo freshman to a 24 yo college graduate paying my own way. I didn't have any illusion that the date on the calendar somehow made me an adult, and meant everyone should treat me that way.
