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Old 07-19-2011, 05:55 PM
 
Location: Florida
2,291 posts, read 4,574,156 times
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I chose not to have children, I could not serve two masters, and, I wanted a successful career.

The way that I looked at it, was, if I didn't have my 2.2 alotted number of children, another family like the Duggars would make up the slack.
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Old 07-19-2011, 09:03 PM
 
Location: here
24,003 posts, read 27,503,744 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Linmora View Post
Okies gotta. I read Hopes a bit wrong then in what I quoted and apologize. I was just reading something into it that probably wasn't meant. I just wanted to get the point across that not all elders that are in assisted living/indenpendent living are neglected and forgotten. My inlaws are on our minds everyday and we have done everything possible to get them into the best situation that we could. Both have pretty serious conditions now and I'm glad that they have daily medical care at this point. Also 3 gourmet meals a day.

We are in the process of moving out of state within the next year and when we get settled, we are looking into getting them out to us in the same state. For now, it would take hog tying my inlaws to get them to move up here in NJ, lol.

Overall a really tough situation and we try our best.
agreed . It is tough no matter what you do.
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Old 07-20-2011, 10:07 AM
 
7,902 posts, read 8,377,420 times
Reputation: 3176
Quote:
Originally Posted by WyoEagle View Post
Okay, so I have already posted a thread asking about the pros and cons of marriage but this is something that didn't really come up on that thread. Please understand that I am not asking for dating advice, I am not feeling sorry for myself, and I am not unhappy. I am just asking a questions. The question is:

Is having a family worth it?
Yes.

Quote:
In other words, is it worth it to have kids?
Financially? No, but that isn't what having kids is about.


Quote:
Would you still do it if you could start over again?
I would have started eariler and had MORE kids.


Quote:
The reason I am asking this is just curiosity. Like the marriage question I asked earlier, I am just asking if I am missing anything. I would appreciate input from anyone, whether you have kids or not, if your kids are good, if your kids are lousy, whoever.
Yes, you are missing something. People who have never had kids do not know what they are missing.

It's not for everyone, and make sure you want them before you have them. You can't send them back to the factory - at least not without some serious legal consequences.

What kind of kids you have, good or lousy, depends MOSTLY on YOU.
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Old 07-20-2011, 10:10 AM
 
7,902 posts, read 8,377,420 times
Reputation: 3176
Quote:
Originally Posted by CancerianMoonPrincess View Post
^^ thank you! I can find fullfillmemt in God! Not my uterus. Yes He gave me a uterus, but that doesn't mean everyone should use it! Do you think Childless Missionaries are unfulfilled? No.
Sure they are. That's why they're missionaries.
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Old 07-20-2011, 10:19 AM
 
2,502 posts, read 2,946,272 times
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Originally Posted by Strel View Post
Sure they are. That's why they're missionaries.
That doesn't necessarily mean that they're trying to fill the void. Some missionaries adopt children from the countries they do missions in.
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Old 07-20-2011, 10:27 AM
 
7,902 posts, read 8,377,420 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CancerianMoonPrincess View Post
That doesn't necessarily mean that they're trying to fill the void. Some missionaries adopt children from the countries they do missions in.

In which case they are also parents, and unlike the childless, in a position to judge.

Everyone who has had children has had some experience being childless.

Being a parent is not for everyone, but I just don't think the childless really have much of a shred of a scintilla of a speck of a clue what it is like to be one.

How could they?

Choose wisely. Life is short.
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Old 07-20-2011, 11:27 AM
 
3,627 posts, read 6,862,998 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hoffdano View Post
If you want to fully participate in humanity you will have children. If you don't have children, then you're never a parent and will never directly contribute to developing the next generation. You can't impart your values, your knowledge, and your heritage to other people any other way.
I don't have children, and I sometimes wish I did. The reason I don't have children? I gave my childbearing years to others' children as a teacher. It left me with no time or energy left for meeting a husband, let alone raising children. (I know many teachers can somehow manage school and family, but I recognized from the beginning that I was not one of them.)

I do have the husband now, but he has no interest in adopting a child.
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Old 07-20-2011, 02:17 PM
 
Location: Central Texas
13,720 posts, read 23,838,695 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sll3454 View Post
I don't have children, and I sometimes wish I did. The reason I don't have children? I gave my childbearing years to others' children as a teacher. It left me with no time or energy left for meeting a husband, let alone raising children. (I know many teachers can somehow manage school and family, but I recognized from the beginning that I was not one of them.)

I do have the husband now, but he has no interest in adopting a child.
You DID contribute. You have done far more than most. You gave hundreds of children one hour a day for perhaps a year of their life.
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Old 07-20-2011, 03:52 PM
 
Location: Traveling again
2,535 posts, read 1,882,618 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sll3454 View Post
I don't have children, and I sometimes wish I did. The reason I don't have children? I gave my childbearing years to others' children as a teacher. It left me with no time or energy left for meeting a husband, let alone raising children. (I know many teachers can somehow manage school and family, but I recognized from the beginning that I was not one of them.)

I do have the husband now, but he has no interest in adopting a child.
Having children is more than giving birth or adopting. You had and still have many children and as a teacher you are helping parents raise their children. You are doing what parents don't have the time, skill, or knowledge to do. Just think of all the children you have helped and when they realize their potential and succeed, they remember teachers such as yourself. I tend to believe your job is in some ways harder because you have more children to deal with. I only have 4 not including DH and the dogs If 3 were not school age, I wouldn't be able to pull it off.
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Old 07-20-2011, 04:24 PM
 
775 posts, read 918,122 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lookup138 View Post
Having children is more than giving birth or adopting. You had and still have many children and as a teacher you are helping parents raise their children. You are doing what parents don't have the time, skill, or knowledge to do. Just think of all the children you have helped and when they realize their potential and succeed, they remember teachers such as yourself. I tend to believe your job is in some ways harder because you have more children to deal with. I only have 4 not including DH and the dogs If 3 were not school age, I wouldn't be able to pull it off.
Exactly. You don't need to have children to "participate in humanity". Why would someone think that?
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