Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Teens don't have many sleep overs unless the parents house is a free for all. Don't worry about it, it's a good sign that a bunch of teens didn't want to hang out with you all night. They must not get to do all the crap they have to hide from the law in your house. If a parents house is a good place for all the teens to crash out that means they either allow them to do illegal crap there or they are super religious. Don't worry about it. It's good you don't let all the teens party at your house.
Oh, man, you've got me pegged! We actually do pagan sacrifices... illegal AND religious, all at once!
FYI......My son had just met this girl and is not his gf. Never had a real date just a stupid incident that they were both involved in after knowing each other two days. That was enough for her father to know he didn't want her to see my son and I totally respect that. I would be so pissed if another parent knew I did not want my son to see their child, and they disrespected my wishes and snuck my son in anyway. How rude and thoughtless to do that to another parent. How sad that so many of you see nothing wrong with that. Just wait till it happens to you. By the way...after I said no about her coming here as long as her father forbids it, he hasn't asked since and is interested in girls at his college instead. Thank you bakerbaby and beachmel for restoring my faith in Moms again.
I can't believe how fixated some of you are on this issue and shoe buying. Too much time on your hands I guess.
Nobody is saying you should sneak her into your house. You're soooooo missing the point.
How you respond influences what he will share with you. What he learned is to not tell you details of his life. Of course he wouldn't ask to have her over gain since you said that. You've pushed him to keeping his business private and pretend he's with people you approve. Next time he is seeing a girl whose father doesn't approve of him, he's not going to tell you. He'll keep that to himself, and you won't have a clue when he brings her to the house.
FYI......My son had just met this girl and is not his gf. Never had a real date just a stupid incident that they were both involved in after knowing each other two days. That was enough for her father to know he didn't want her to see my son and I totally respect that. I would be so pissed if another parent knew I did not want my son to see their child, and they disrespected my wishes and snuck my son in anyway. How rude and thoughtless to do that to another parent. How sad that so many of you see nothing wrong with that. Just wait till it happens to you. By the way...after I said no about her coming here as long as her father forbids it, he hasn't asked since and is interested in girls at his college instead. Thank you bakerbaby and beachmel for restoring my faith in Moms again.
I can't believe how fixated some of you are on this issue and shoe buying. Too much time on your hands I guess.
As the mother of 3 ages 25, 21 and 16. I have learned if you are desperate for your child to talk to you they can tell and just back off and clam up. What has worked for me is being very laid back, slowly drawing out the info in a casual way and making sure I don't totally overreact when I hear something that is upsetting. Just calmly listen interject my opinion on the issue and try to let them form their own. Make your rules simple but firm and stick by them. Welcome all their friends and try to get to know them. Outward appearances can be deceiving one of my kid's friend who was the brightest and most respectful dressed "weird" and had pink hair. Once they hit their 20s and move out of your house the relationship really improves and they actually ask for your advice.
Teens don't have many sleep overs unless the parents house is a free for all. Don't worry about it, it's a good sign that a bunch of teens didn't want to hang out with you all night. They must not get to do all the crap they have to hide from the law in your house. If a parents house is a good place for all the teens to crash out that means they either allow them to do illegal crap there or they are super religious. Don't worry about it. It's good you don't let all the teens party at your house.
Maybe teens who just want to party and get into stuff they shouldn't be getting into, but that's not true for all teens. Or are you being sarcastic? Sorry if you are, I prolly misunderstood. But a lot of teens these days just want to get together, hang out, eat, and play video games or watch YouTube videos or movies. Our oldest and his friends play Ultimate, and when they have sleepovers they like to play in the middle of the night with a lit frsbee which is something they don't normally get to do. It's these kinds of things that create lasting memories and strengthen the bonds between these guys.
Nobody is saying you should sneak her into your house. You're soooooo missing the point.
How you respond influences what he will share with you. What he learned is to not tell you details of his life. Of course he wouldn't ask to have her over gain since you said that. You've pushed him to keeping his business private and pretend he's with people you approve. Next time he is seeing a girl whose father doesn't approve of him, he's not going to tell you. He'll keep that to himself, and you won't have a clue when he brings her to the house.
Have her over again? So I guess I must be the rare parent that has a teen that doesn't share intimate details of his life with, right? So unusual, right? Most kids tell their parent's what they think they want to hear and parent's are so happy that their kids are "sharing". I can't believe how you read into things I have never said like this statement and so many others....."You've pushed him to keeping his business private and pretend he's with people you approve." You get all this from wanting to respect another parent's wishes? Pretend he's with people I approve of? Are you ok? If I am hostile it is because I am getting advice from people that can't read and put their own personal spin on what they make up as they go along, not on the facts that I have presented. I have learned a valuable lesson by coming here.
Perhaps Hope you could start focusing on some other poor parent?
OK, I have to be blunt here. Perhaps your son does not enjoy drama and things being blown out of proportion. Others have hinted, but I'm going to come right out and say it - if your behavior in this thread is any indication of the type of "discussions" you have (or not) with your son, then I can see why he avoids talking to you.
Taking offense at absolutely everything that is not in line with what you want to hear does not leave the doorway open to effective communication.
This is an anonymous discussion board, you have to understand that we do not know you personally, and that nobody is trying to attack you, they're trying to better understand your situation. As with all message boards, the simple fact is that you asked - and it would be nice if you could listen without getting all in a bunch.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
