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Old 10-21-2011, 12:35 PM
 
4,502 posts, read 11,648,454 times
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Okay, so my DD just turned 13. She's been trying out her own style of dress, etc for a while and that's understandable since all teens have to figure out "who they are" and where they fit in. Her choice of clothing style is not outrageous ---- she actually ranges the whole thing, from conservative to rocker to hip, etc. (nothing sexy, though, she's way too modest for that!!!)

Well, now, she wants to experiment with her hair. I told her that's fine but we're not running to the salon every week for something new. She said no, all she wants to do is shave the side of her head!!!
I asked her what she was talking about and she said she only wants to shave the one side of her head (not the back and not "half" of her head, just the side). I was taken aback and told her to seriously think about it and that maybe she can leave the other side long in case she decides she doesn't want the shaved look, she can flip her hair over.

I really do NOT want her to do this. I just can't picture her with the side of her head shaved and am thinking it will take about a year for her hair to fully grow back.

I don't want to "step on her toes" but I think I'm going to draw the line here and not let her do it.

Any opinions????
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Old 10-21-2011, 12:43 PM
 
84 posts, read 88,876 times
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That's rough! My dd is 12 (going to be 13 in Feb) and hasn't wanted to go the wild route yet. I do let her dye her hair (with my help) and style it how she likes. Maybe you could ask her to find a picture of what she likes and show it to you? If you watch Project Runway, one of the designers has the side of her head shaved and depending on how she wears her hair, it can look pretty. I would ask to see a picture and I'd have to think about it for a few days. But in the end, it is only hair, and it will grow back. I feel your pain!
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Old 10-21-2011, 12:43 PM
 
1,933 posts, read 3,132,488 times
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As one who tried it on with my mom, after begging and pleading I went and cut my hair super short ala Demi Moore in GI Jane but slightly and I mean slightly longer.

I wished my mother never gave in and smack the stupid out of me because I do not have any pictures of me at the age of 13-14. IT TOOK FOREVER TO GROW! Because as adults we know that time stands still as a tween! I rather prefered if my mother allowed me to Manic Panic my hair and get a cute cut over that damn hair cut!
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Old 10-21-2011, 12:47 PM
 
Location: Penobscot Bay, the best place in Maine!
1,891 posts, read 5,142,910 times
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I knew a girl who did that when I was younger. She was WAY COOL. But... it was the late 80's and that was a cool look then- she actually had shaved both sides. (However, she did it in such a way that when her (long) hair was down, both sides were covered and you couldn't see the shaved part. When her hair was up in a ponytail, though.. she looked like a crazy punk rocker!)

IDK... I'd go with the whole "Why don't you wait 6 months and see if you still really want to do it." thing. Chances are... in 6 months... she won't.
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Old 10-21-2011, 12:59 PM
 
Location: Back in MADISON Wi thank God!
1,047 posts, read 3,232,714 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by deerislesmile View Post
I knew a girl who did that when I was younger. She was WAY COOL. But... it was the late 80's and that was a cool look then- she actually had shaved both sides. (However, she did it in such a way that when her (long) hair was down, both sides were covered and you couldn't see the shaved part. When her hair was up in a ponytail, though.. she looked like a crazy punk rocker!)

IDK... I'd go with the whole "Why don't you wait 6 months and see if you still really want to do it." thing. Chances are... in 6 months... she won't.
Yes, I had the side of my head shaved, I was early 20's and it was in the 80's. 13 does seem a little young. People that age sometimes are not really thinking it through. Maybe suggest she keep thinking about it, and if you both decide to go through with it, have it professionally done. After all, it is just hair and it will grow back.
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Old 10-21-2011, 01:05 PM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,907 posts, read 34,933,184 times
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We let our daughter dye the underside of her hair bright blue over the summer a couple years ago, and despite what the kids at Hot Topic tell you, that stuff does not fade in a few weeks. It was a washed-out green for several months. I think it would really depend on the style your daughter has in mind, and I agree with wanting to see a picture. She'll have to keep it up (keep shaving it), so you might remind her of that. Ultimately, if she's adamant, I think I'd give in--it's her hair and her lesson to learn. I'd encourage her to wait until summer in that case, though. That will give her a couple months to deal with it.
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Old 10-21-2011, 01:06 PM
 
Location: You know... That place
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My older sis shaved the right side of her head in 1987. We still make fun of her for it.
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Old 10-21-2011, 01:08 PM
 
Location: Denver area
21,130 posts, read 22,080,793 times
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Anya Ayoung-Chee hair: to shave or not to shave | The Reluctant Stylista

I'd probably agree with the "wait a few months" advice then if she still wants to, let her. It's hair, it will grow back....
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Old 10-21-2011, 01:08 PM
 
Location: Eastern time zone
4,469 posts, read 6,155,745 times
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Thirteen is pretty average for hair experimentation, at least judging by the local middle school crowd. By high school they seem to have pretty much grown out of the pink stripes, shaved heads, platinum-with-a-black-forelock thing.
I'd let her go with it. It's only hair. Of course, we all have our personal limits, and though Eldest had her hair every shade you could safely and inexpensively turn chestnut hair, and most styles to go with them, I would have to sneak up on Manchild and shave his head if he ever tried a fauxhawk (just because I think they're stupid-looking). So I freely admit to sex-linked hypocrisy.
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Old 10-21-2011, 01:14 PM
 
Location: So Ca
13,817 posts, read 13,510,876 times
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A very wise parenting class instructor told us when our kids were entering their teens that safe ways for them to rebel were through music, hair and clothes. And that we should save our strength for fighting the bigger battles: drugs and sex. Also, that if we let them do their thing with the first three, we might not have to fight over the latter issues. He turned out to be pretty much right.

My niece shaved half her head when she was 16. She's my sister and BIL's third child, so they didn't balk. We all carefully avoided making a big deal out of it. It grew back.
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