U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 12-21-2011, 08:29 AM
 
4,267 posts, read 5,143,379 times
Reputation: 3579

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
If I pull out a bag of Cheetos at the mall, no one thinks anything of it.
No kidding. I've never seen anyone hide their grilled cheese sandwich or ice cream cone either. Those are both made from secretions. If I put breastmilk in a bottle the secretion is going to be even more visible to people then if I just go ahead and feed my baby from my breast. No matter what I do, someone will be offended. I guess I should just stay home until the baby is weaned. The risk of possibly offending someone is just too great.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 12-21-2011, 08:35 AM
 
Location: TX
6,009 posts, read 4,947,374 times
Reputation: 2585
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dorthy View Post
That's not true. I've seen people cry, sweat, spit, blow their nose and even pee in public. I was pretty unfazed by all of those events.
Oy. I understand that some people break these societal rules. I'm talking about your average U.S. citizen, though. Most people hide (or are at least ENCOURAGED by the majority to hide) all of these secretions. And it's because not everyone wants to see that, especially in a restaurant where they're trying to eat... Would you give the green light to anyone who wants to belch or pass gas as loud as they feel is needed in a restaurant? Why or why not? And I contend you're a rare breed if you don't think it's rude for people to spit or pee in public...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dorthy View Post
The key word here is "typically". Some babies eat more some eat less. Some nurse for comfort. There's nothing wrong with a baby who wants to eat when he or she is out and about and there is nothing wrong with a mother who feeds her baby. Besides, some people like to leave their house for more then a few hours at a time. Glad it worked for you but it's not right for every family or every situation.

Wow, Vic! Tacky, irresponsible and inconsiderate? We are talking about feeding a hungry child. Why would any mother want to prevent her child from eating? So much judgement.
Oh don't honorify breastfeeding in public, Dorthy! You breastfeed for the child, yes, but you breastfeed in public for yourself. C'mon now

(No, 'honorify' isn't a word, but it sure is a popular hobby)

I will add, too, a baby should never nurse purely for comfort. And even if your baby has to eat every hour (which is very rare), that's still time to go eat. If you have other stuff to do, and you cannot possibly manage your time better in what I hope is a rare circumstance (welcome to parenting - it's going to inevitably include inconvenience and sacrifice if you do it right), you can at very least not feed your child where other people are eating. That is NOT to much to ask.

Whenever possible, it's actualy MORE convenient for you to plan ahead if you think about it. If you feed your baby before you leave - taking care of their needs first, yes? - you can sit and enjoy your meal at the restaurant with no interruptions.

All this is not to mention that you want to teach time management to your child someday. What better way to start than by picking up the habit yourself?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-21-2011, 08:39 AM
 
Location: TX
6,009 posts, read 4,947,374 times
Reputation: 2585
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
If I pull out a bag of Cheetos at the mall, no one thinks anything of it.
Yes, because Cheetohs are a very sexualized human body part. Try and build a proper comparison here: It's INSANE for people to mind watching a baby eat, not that insane for people to not want to see someone else's breast while they're eating. If the mother covers up properly (which is defined by her own possibly inconsiderate judgment, unfortunately), it helps. But it's still irresponsible that you would ever need to do any of this, in my book.

Quote:
Originally Posted by cc0789 View Post
that's wonderful that you could plan it out, but you had the opportunity because you were putting unnatural substances into your infant, therefore they struggled to digest it, leaving you with all that freedom. For breastfed infants, since it's natures perfect food, it goes through them rather quickly, because their bodies digest it very easily, and that's what some consider the "responsible" thing to do.
I know how quickly breast milk goes through them. 1 1/2 to 2 hours, just like I said.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-21-2011, 08:39 AM
 
1,677 posts, read 1,968,624 times
Reputation: 5475
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cinebar View Post
No kidding! LOL

And just to clear up one thing - it's not like my ex drank it by the gallons. He tried it a couple of times - in very small amounts, really just enough to say he had.

I don't know what the big whup is.
Whatever floats your boat. However, I'm not quite sure what kind of reaction you were expecting by sharing that information. Surely, you knew that would sound strange or gross to some people, even though it's no "big whup" to you.

And nope, I've never read Grapes of Wrath.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-21-2011, 09:00 AM
 
Location: Geneva, IL
12,976 posts, read 11,796,877 times
Reputation: 14677
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0 View Post
Oy. I understand that some people break these societal rules. I'm talking about your average U.S. citizen......in the 1890's.
There, fixed it for you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0 View Post
Oh don't honorify breastfeeding in public, Dorthy! You breastfeed for the child, yes, but you breastfeed in public for yourself. C'mon now
Was this a serious comment?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0 View Post
I will add, too, a baby should never nurse purely for comfort. And even if your baby has to eat every hour (which is very rare), that's still time to go eat. If you have other stuff to do, and you cannot possibly manage your time better in what I hope is a rare circumstance (welcome to parenting - it's going to inevitably include inconvenience and sacrifice if you do it right), you can at very least not feed your child where other people are eating. That is NOT to much to ask.

Whenever possible, it's actualy MORE convenient for you to plan ahead if you think about it. If you feed your baby before you leave - taking care of their needs first, yes? - you can sit and enjoy your meal at the restaurant with no interruptions.

All this is not to mention that you want to teach time management to your child someday. What better way to start than by picking up the habit yourself?
All of this is blather from a misinformed parent who has not actively been responsible for feeding an infant. If you are not the owner of the lactating mammaries, you have no say, and sorry but in the case of breastfeeding the opinions of a disparaging man person counts for naught.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-21-2011, 09:06 AM
 
1,677 posts, read 1,968,624 times
Reputation: 5475
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dorthy View Post
Breastmilk is food. It's meant to be eaten. That is it's purpose. It tastes like melted vanilla ice cream. It's not gross. We're mammals and that's how mammals feed their babies. It's really not that weird. It's food.

Telling breastfeeding mothers that they should be responsible and pump and feed prior to leaving the house is not helpful. Sometimes babies get hungry even if they just ate. A mother should not feel like she is being irresponsible for feeding her baby when her baby asks to be fed. If a mother wants to pump and feed, great. To me that seems like an awful lot of extra work just to possibly appease a random stranger who might be offended by the sight of a mother feeding her child in public.

I've nursed both of my children in public many times and never gotten more then a small handful of curious looks and smiles. Most people either don't notice or don't care. I think that the vast majority of people are sensible enough to take breastfeeding for what it is which is nothing more then a mother feeding her child.
This is true for me also, which is why I never understood the big breastfeeding debate. It is perfectly normal and acceptable to breastfeed a child. I don't know anybody who's been asked to leave a public place or been treated badly for breastfeeding. I'm sure it happens, but it doesn't seem to be as widespread as some would have you think. The people who are uncomfortable about it are free to look the other way, but I don't see a stranger lecturing a nursing mother about how she should have fed her baby at home being an everyday occurrence.

There ARE some people who think it's gross, nasty, or whatever. Most of these people would keep their opinion to themselves when they see a nursing mom. The mothers who cause most of the furor are NOT the moms who are simply nursing their child and minding her own business, but the ones who HAVE to draw attention to the fact that they are doing it, or the ones who have to show everyone what a wonderful mom they are and expect admiration, or the ones breastfeeding elementary aged school kids. I don't think mothers like that are that common either, but like rude, nasty people, there are some like that out there. Breastfeeding is not an act that deserves disgust or contempt any more than it's an act that deserves adoration and praise. It's a normal, natural thing to do. Nobody is going to fawn over you for cooking dinner, so nobody should expect it for breastfeeding your baby either. If there was more mutual respect on both ends, there wouldn't be a problem with it at all.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-21-2011, 09:15 AM
 
4,267 posts, read 5,143,379 times
Reputation: 3579
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0 View Post
Oy. I understand that some people break these societal rules. I'm talking about your average U.S. citizen, though. Most people hide (or are at least ENCOURAGED by the majority to hide) all of these secretions. And it's because not everyone wants to see that, especially in a restaurant where they're trying to eat... Would you give the green light to anyone who wants to belch or pass gas as loud as they feel is needed in a restaurant? Why or why not? And I contend you're a rare breed if you don't think it's rude for people to spit or pee in public...
I said that I was unfazed by it. I don't live my life trying to control others.

Quote:
Oh don't honorify breastfeeding in public, Dorthy! You breastfeed for the child, yes, but you breastfeed in public for yourself. C'mon now
How does one breastfeed for themselves? You're not making sense.

Quote:
I will add, too, a baby should never nurse purely for comfort.
In your opinion. An opinion that many do not share by the way. It's not polite to tell people what you think they should or should not do based on your limited perspective.

Quote:
And even if your baby has to eat every hour (which is very rare), that's still time to go eat. If you have other stuff to do, and you cannot possibly manage your time better in what I hope is a rare circumstance (welcome to parenting - it's going to inevitably include inconvenience and sacrifice if you do it right), you can at very least not feed your child where other people are eating. That is NOT to much to ask.
Well sometimes, Vic I leave me house for more then a few hours at a time. There's no need for me to hide out in my house or head home when my child gets hungry because I have food available for her wherever and whenever she needs it. Breastfeeding is very convenient.

Quote:
Whenever possible, it's actually MORE convenient for you to plan ahead if you think about it. If you feed your baby before you leave - taking care of their needs first, yes? - you can sit and enjoy your meal at the restaurant with no interruptions.
Unless they get hungry again, Vic. Sometimes things happen despite our plans. Welcome to parenting.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-21-2011, 09:16 AM
 
11,230 posts, read 9,235,817 times
Reputation: 14654
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0 View Post
Yes, because Cheetohs are a very sexualized human body part.
That the breast is a sexualIZED (MADE sexual) is something more worthy of changing than women's habit of feeding their babies when their babies are hungry.

Quote:
Try and build a proper comparison here: It's INSANE for people to mind watching a baby eat, not that insane for people to not want to see someone else's breast while they're eating. If the mother covers up properly (which is defined by her own possibly inconsiderate judgment, unfortunately), it helps. But it's still irresponsible that you would ever need to do any of this, in my book.
It is insane to have one's desire not to see it require action on the part of the mother rather than taking the simple action of turning one's head. The responsibility lies squarely with the person who does not want to see an eating baby. The inconsideration is to think that a Mom and baby should be shut in due to Puritanical sensibilities.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-21-2011, 09:19 AM
 
11,230 posts, read 9,235,817 times
Reputation: 14654
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnaNomus View Post
This is true for me also, which is why I never understood the big breastfeeding debate. It is perfectly normal and acceptable to breastfeed a child. I don't know anybody who's been asked to leave a public place or been treated badly for breastfeeding. I'm sure it happens, but it doesn't seem to be as widespread as some would have you think.


Apparently it varies widely by geography.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-21-2011, 09:19 AM
 
Location: Up above the world so high!
45,270 posts, read 86,082,030 times
Reputation: 39670
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vic 2.0 View Post
I can see you missed my joke - that it's weird for YOU to talk about breasts, considering your user name.



Plus, she was right. There's absolutely no difference between considering one bodily function gross and considering the other gross. Bodily functions IN GENERAL are "gross", with the exception of maybe tears. Not that "gross" has any business in a moral debate, but it does explain what society has against it. I say the responsible thing to do is either pump your breast milk for later use or just feed your kid before you leave the house! Cristina didn't breastfeed our son, but we never even had to bottle feed him while we were out. Why? We were responsible and planned things out, as a parent should get used to doing in general.
I really pity you. Truly.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top