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Old 12-23-2011, 06:37 AM
 
Location: Central, NJ
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My friends with dogs are all very happy right now. Sadly for me this is just another task that my cat finds to be beneath him.
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Old 12-23-2011, 10:37 AM
 
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I agree with what everyone else has said--you make the food and if he doesn't want to eat it, don't make a big deal out of it. He's not going to starve.

The only thing I ever did differently was that if my daughter didn't want to eat what we were having, I'd tell her she could make a peanut butter sandwich. I didn't do it for her--she had to make it herself. She did that a couple of times but usually just went ahead and ate what we ate.

Also, in a group setting, if it makes you feel better, just tell the teacher/hostess that if he doesn't want to eat, not to worry about it. With your son out of earshot, explain that he's in a picky stage and you're trying to ignore it. There's no need to give him something special to eat or cajole him into eating. And I guarantee the other kids won't be paying any attention to what he does or doesn't eat.
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Old 12-23-2011, 11:23 AM
 
43,012 posts, read 89,141,410 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Irish Eyes View Post
My friends with dogs are all very happy right now. Sadly for me this is just another task that my cat finds to be beneath him.
That's funny!
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Old 12-23-2011, 03:16 PM
 
11,615 posts, read 19,752,606 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swerver View Post
Our 4 year old is a picky eater. I've tried not to worry about this much in the past. Now that he's doing more stuff with other kids like preschool, birthday parties, I've noticed that he seems to be quite a bit pickier than any of the other kids. Went to a birthday party where they served pizza, all the kids loved it, our kid wouldn't touch it. He eats cereal out of a bowl with a spoon, and drinks a glass of milk with it, but refuses to try cereal with milk. He has a pajama party coming up at preschool and they are serving pancakes, which he won't touch. Though he likes french toast.

I don't want to be heavy handed and force him to eat stuff, but I don't want him to turn into some oddball that can't ever eat in a group setting. I know that he will like these foods - it's not like I'm trying to get him to eat brussell sprouts, this is pizza and cereal we are talking about, 2 kid staples! I even tried to bribe him with a new toy if he tried something, but he didn't go for it. Is it too soon to worry about this? I kinda think it is, but still it bugs me. My wife says he's just trying to out-stubborn me.
I don't think you have a problem. Why do you care that he eats dry cereal and then drinks the milk? Nothing bad will happen if he skips the pizza or pancakes at a birthday party.

If I were you I would do nothing.
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Old 12-23-2011, 05:55 PM
 
Location: Pit of filth
410 posts, read 1,325,241 times
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I think my 7 year old can beat your picky eater any day...lol. My son is 4 ft and weighs 44 lbs.

I think the best advice has already been given--fix the meal, sit in in front of him, and take away the plate when he says he's done. Hunger will eventually hit him and he'll try new foods. The hardest part is to not give in when they want their favorite foods instead of what was prepared for dinner or any meal for that matter. Don't worry about group settings, the other kids don't mind and won't make fun of him.

My son's food list consists of peanut butter and honey (no crust), grilled cheese (no crust), cereal (4 kinds only), mac and cheese (box only--no real stuff) and milk.

The one thing to ask yourself is this "Have I ever met an adult that was this picky?" The answer is usually no, and so all parents of picky eaters can be very glad that eventually everyone outgrows being extremely picky.
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Old 12-23-2011, 09:21 PM
 
18,856 posts, read 30,508,259 times
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The question is, do you give in to a picky eater, cater to their "pickiness", make them taste new food, or not?

Have you created this "picky food" monster?
When is "enough is enough"?

When is this an eating disorder? Or OCD?

Or a swallowing/texture issue?
When should someone seek help or treatment?

The answers are individual...but I never catered to my picky eater, it was "eat it, or have cereal". I was not running a restaurant. And my kids all grew out of it, it seems to be an issue between the ages of two and fifteen...gradually fading.

I think the toughest years were 6 to 12. Especially my daughter. She drove me insane. She would not eat casseroles, anything with sauce, meat, except chicken...
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Old 12-24-2011, 04:29 PM
 
2,922 posts, read 2,915,047 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Momma_bear View Post
I don't think you have a problem. Why do you care that he eats dry cereal and then drinks the milk? Nothing bad will happen if he skips the pizza or pancakes at a birthday party.

If I were you I would do nothing.
I've never liked milk on my cereal. Everyone else in the family puts the milk in the bowl first and adds cereal a few spoonfuls at a time. It doesn't get soggy that way and the mild doesn't get icky bits in it.
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Old 12-24-2011, 06:00 PM
 
2,873 posts, read 4,550,915 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Southern Phoenician View Post
I feel your pain. Our son used to eat everything we gave him until he was about 2. He's picky but loves fruit so I just make sure he has a side of fruit at dinner. He won't eat most of what I put on his plate, but it's there. He's 9. I have those plates that are like the school cafeteria trays because he can't stand for his food to touch. He has a very strong sense of smell, so I suspect part of his issue is due to that. I also suspect it's a texture thing as well. And part behavioral (he's strong-willed). He's also very small for his age. I've tried everything, including having him help me cook and even enrolled in him into one of those cooking classes but he still refused to try what he made. We've watched food network TV together since he was 4. Like your child, he will eat foods most kids won't eat but won't eat foods most kids will eat. Peer pressure doesn't work at all (which will hopefully be a good thing).
I don't think people realize how much sensory issues can play into it. I can smell a cut cucumber from the attic. I can't eat salad from a bag because it smells 'wrong' and pork always smells really foul to me. Last week I was trying to eat off a plastic plate and I kept smelling this wash of really nasty bacterial odor. I thought it was the food, but it turned out the plate had once had something that went bad in it. It had been washed several times and no one else could smell it, but I sure could.

I also have a real texture problem with peas and beans. Anything firm on the outside and mushy inside. It turns my stomach. I can't actually look at beans and peas, or corn off the cob....I've got a really weird phobia about small round things, especially if just one bean or whatever is separate from the mound. It makes me gag.

I definitely not a picky eater though...I love eating! I love trying new things. There's just certain foods that my senses don't like, and I think this can be true for kids as well. It's just hard to know when it's a real issue and when the kid is just being stubborn.
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Old 12-26-2011, 02:46 PM
 
Location: Western Washington
8,004 posts, read 9,683,063 times
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I'm with the others who say, "Prepare whatever the family is eating and leave it up to your child as to whether or not he's going to eat it." It only really becomes a problem, if your little one is losing weight and failing to thrive. If your pediatrician is not worried about his growth, relax. The more you battle over things like this (attention!), the more it's going to eat at YOU! Sometimes it can be a control issue as well.

We have a 3 yr old GS here at the house who has been going through a Mr. Picky stage. The problem is, he wants to get up running around and being disruptive during meal time, rather than sitting quietly through the meal. We've discovered that by forcing him to sit still and quiet, he's getting quite bored, doing nothing. Eventually, he starts picking at his food. We quit telling him to "eat his food" and simply started telling him, "You don't have to eat it if you're not hungry, but it is all you're going to get and you ARE going to sit quietly until everyone else is done. Hmmmm never went through that much with my 4 children, but every child is different. By not pressuring him about the actual "food", he seems to be thinking, "Oh crap, there's nothing ELSE to do while I'm sitting here. I might as well EAT!"

Last edited by beachmel; 12-26-2011 at 03:38 PM..
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Old 12-26-2011, 02:58 PM
 
11,230 posts, read 9,249,360 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ParallelJJCat View Post
I don't think people realize how much sensory issues can play into it. I can smell a cut cucumber from the attic. I can't eat salad from a bag because it smells 'wrong' and pork always smells really foul to me. Last week I was trying to eat off a plastic plate and I kept smelling this wash of really nasty bacterial odor. I thought it was the food, but it turned out the plate had once had something that went bad in it. It had been washed several times and no one else could smell it, but I sure could.

I also have a real texture problem with peas and beans. Anything firm on the outside and mushy inside. It turns my stomach. I can't actually look at beans and peas, or corn off the cob....I've got a really weird phobia about small round things, especially if just one bean or whatever is separate from the mound. It makes me gag.

I am going to say something really unpopular. And I mean no direct offense to you. But it seems to me that "texture issues", "smells wrong" (aside from rot) and "sensory issues" is a often a load of rot, just another I don't like it thing. Our species would have died out with "sensory issues" long since. I don't get the inability to eat things one "doesn't like" as if food is not sometimes just sustenance.

But that is me.

We live in a time of massive excess that permits things that would never matter to matter. I am thinking Frank McCourt would have gotten over his "sensory issues" and teaching our kids to cater to these issues is not in their best interest in the event that they ever find themselves in challenging life situations.
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