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Old 12-22-2011, 06:33 PM
 
11,230 posts, read 9,239,684 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by djacques View Post
I probably have more IQ points than your whole family...but believe what you will
Apply it!

Amazon.com: Discipline for Life : Getting it Right with Children (9781887069069): Madelyn Swift: Books

Are we sick of my posting this yet?
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Old 12-22-2011, 07:01 PM
 
32,538 posts, read 29,356,382 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
Not quite. But I am hoping we're all here in 10 years so you can let us know how they did through the teenage years. Seriously. If they are saying "Sure Mom" to taking out the garbage when they're 16 and mad at the world I'm going to know you're on to something!

Last edited by DewDropInn; 12-22-2011 at 07:03 PM.. Reason: I need new glasses for Christmas
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Old 12-22-2011, 07:12 PM
 
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Originally Posted by DewDropInn View Post
Not quite. But I am hoping we're all here in 10 years so you can let us know how they did through the teenage years. Seriously. If they are saying "Sure Mom" to taking out the garbage when they're 16 and mad at the world I'm going to know you're on to something!

Not sure what that has to do with spanking. But I was just joking with my boss today about how I have my blinders on. I am perfect Mom and my kids are never gonna do that stuff!

... And then I wake up.
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Old 12-22-2011, 07:26 PM
 
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Unless there is more to this story, the judge was out of line. His own personal beliefs have no place in the courtroom. Parents DO spank today, and they have a right to do so as they see fit. What they DON'T have the right to do is abuse or injure their child, and I don't see red marks being an injury. My dd gets red marks on her face from sheets and stuffed animals. They fade and they don't hurt. Now if the child had bruises, not red marks, that's another story.

I do find it a little odd that the grandmother would rush the child to the hospital, so perhaps the mother did have a history of child abuse or some other problem.

And I don't see how degrees and IQ has anything to do with it. Every parent knows their own child and what will work, and what won't. It's up to that parent to make a decision based on what THEY know about their own child. I get a little tired of the holier than thou attitude of some non spankers. If you found methods that worked for you and your child that didn't involve spanking, hurray for you. That doesn't give you the right to make decisions for someone else's child. As long as the child isn't being abused (as in beaten with objects, bruised, bloody, broken bones, starved, kicked, punched, etc.) then that child will more than likely turn out just as good as yours.
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Old 12-22-2011, 08:18 PM
 
Location: California
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Unless there is more to this story...
The fact that the mother doesn't have custody is all the MORE I need. I won't second guess a judge who has all the info.
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Old 12-23-2011, 09:39 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Ceece View Post
The fact that the mother doesn't have custody is all the MORE I need. I won't second guess a judge who has all the info.

Do you know if the grandmother already had custody? Or if the mother lost custody because of this incident? I couldn't tell from the article.

And the fact that the judge made the statement "People do not spank today" shows me that he does not have all the facts. People do spank today, plenty of people. If charges were brought against every parent who swatted their kids butt, there wouldn't be enough law enforcement to prosecute them all. Corporal punishment in school still exists in Texas, yet the judge makes the statement, "People don't spank today"? If the law says a teacher can spank, why can't a parent? That makes no sense. So if I felt my child needed a spanking, and allowed the teacher do it, that's fine, but if I do it myself, I get arrested. Really? If special circumstances in THIS particular incident warranted the 5 year probation, that's one thing. But if the judge let his own personal feelings about spanking influence his decision, that is quite another.

Just because someone is a judge doesn't mean they have perfect judgment, so I have no problem second guessing a judge or anybody else when something doesn't sound right to me.
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Old 12-23-2011, 10:06 AM
 
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Originally Posted by AnnaNomus View Post
Do you know if the grandmother already had custody? Or if the mother lost custody because of this incident? I couldn't tell from the article.
That thought had occurred to me as well.
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Old 12-25-2011, 08:43 AM
 
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I'm in the favor of spanking to discipline kids but not to the point of abusing kids. It said, "Gonzales did not use an object to spank her daughter, and the spank did not leave a bruise, but when the child’s grandmother noticed red marks, she took the child to the hospital." IMO either the mom had spanked the child really hard or the child has sensitive skin. If spanking leads to probabtion in USA, I might as well move to Asia to discipline my kids over there. It's accepted over there, or perhaps my Asian gene in me still wants to pass that on. I was spanked and disciplined by my parents, but I ended up respecting my parents.
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Old 12-25-2011, 08:56 AM
 
Location: Wherever life takes me.
5,944 posts, read 6,385,749 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AsianRice View Post
I'm in the favor of spanking to discipline kids but not to the point of abusing kids. It said, "Gonzales did not use an object to spank her daughter, and the spank did not leave a bruise, but when the child’s grandmother noticed red marks, she took the child to the hospital." IMO either the mom had spanked the child really hard or the child has sensitive skin. If spanking leads to probabtion in USA, I might as well move to Asia to discipline my kids over there. It's accepted over there, or perhaps my Asian gene in me still wants to pass that on. I was spanked and disciplined by my parents, but I ended up respecting my parents.
You can discipline and punish without spanking.
If they are so young that they can't understand reasoning they shouldn't be hit for doing something wrong. Remove them from the situation.

If they are old enough to understand reasoning then they shouldn't be hit then either because you can talk to them.

Look at the duggars, I swear that woman never spanks, never raises her voice or anything and her kids look like perfect little robots.
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Old 12-25-2011, 12:02 PM
 
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Originally Posted by txtqueen View Post
You can discipline and punish without spanking.
If they are so young that they can't understand reasoning they shouldn't be hit for doing something wrong. Remove them from the situation.

If they are old enough to understand reasoning then they shouldn't be hit then either because you can talk to them.

Look at the duggars, I swear that woman never spanks, never raises her voice or anything and her kids look like perfect little robots.
That's not my philosophy. Perhaps yours but not mine. I'm not going to punish them every time they do something wrong. I am going to spank them when necessary.

Last edited by ho hey!; 12-25-2011 at 12:26 PM..
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