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Old 12-22-2011, 06:26 PM
 
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I have been reading through some posts and found some possible explanation / answers, but I thought I should still post this.

My sister-in-law has a 22 month old daughter. She is pretty active. A few times a day she gets into this mode where she starts demanding things like chocolates, ice cream or just to go out, all at one time. Sometimes she wakes up at night at odd-times and demands for these things and/or milk. Most of the time she sleeps well at night. She also watches a lot of TV and even when there is a song playing on the TV, she demands playing another song on the cellphone, simultaneously. Her mom tried scolding, spanking and ignoring. Ignoring seems to have helped a bit, but temporarily.

Based on some posts that I read so far, I think we need to find other ways to discipline her and have patience. Does anyone have any inputs on how we can discipline her?
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Old 12-22-2011, 06:32 PM
 
Location: North America
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You have a toddler so just ignore. Anything else is not really going to do much.
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Old 12-22-2011, 06:38 PM
 
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I wouldn't punish or spank.

I'd be patient, talk in monotone voice, and never give in to her. This is about teaching manners and how to get what one wants. If she demanded something, I'd calmly say, "What's the proper way to ask?" And I would only give it if she asked properly and calmly. That's rewarding good behavior. Eventually she'll learn how to ask properly all the time.

Then you're next step is helping her learn that sometimes the answer is no, even if asked properly. I'd calmly say, "We have to do X, Y and Z instead" or "I'm busy doing X, Y and Z instead." If she throws herself down on the floor or has a tantrum in any way, I'd walk way. I wouldn't engage her. I wouldn't talk to her. I wouldn't look at her. And eventually she'll learn that she doesn't get anything if she tantrums.

The main keys are: patience, a monotone calm voice, clear consistent explanations, positive rewards, and ignoring when necessary.
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Old 12-22-2011, 06:49 PM
 
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One question: Why does she watch a lot of TV?
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Old 12-22-2011, 06:54 PM
 
Location: New York City
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Two yos are so excited to be talking and being able to express themselves, and that includes asking for things. You don't have to give into her demands, but respect the fact that she is using her words. That's exciting. And tell her parents that putting her in front of the tv is not a great idea.
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Old 12-22-2011, 06:58 PM
 
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Attention, and choices. Kids get demanding if they feel like no one pays attention to them. So, don't expect to get much done. And when kids do "demand" things that are not going to happen, give choices, kid: "I WANT CHOCOLATE", Mom: "Time for fruit, do you want an apple or an orange?"

I never did spanking, I can't stand crying. It gives me a headache. Same with "time out", I think when kids misbehave, it is often due to being over tired, over hungry, dirty, or over stimulated.
The key is to not let those things occur for toddlers.
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Old 12-22-2011, 07:02 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
Same with "time out", I think when kids misbehave, it is often due to being over tired, over hungry, dirty, or over stimulated.
Just using this as a jumping off point because it inspired me:

One of my favorite responses was: Sweetly saying, "You sound sooooooo tired."

Ohhhhhhh, they quickly regained composure because they didn't want to take a nap!
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Old 12-22-2011, 07:09 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
I think when kids misbehave, it is often due to being over tired, over hungry, dirty, or over stimulated.
The key is to not let those things occur for toddlers.
Bingo. The "over stimulated" is why I asked why she's watching a lot of TV.
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Old 12-22-2011, 07:13 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn View Post
Bingo. The "over stimulated" is why I asked why she's watching a lot of TV.
Yep! It could also factor into "needing attention" too.
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Old 12-22-2011, 07:14 PM
 
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Has anyone ever told her "no". No explanation, no compromise, just plain "no"?
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