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Old 12-27-2011, 08:12 PM
 
Location: Geneva, IL
12,976 posts, read 11,847,064 times
Reputation: 14681

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
Zimbo, I think the thing is that the OP and her relatives have spoken up. There's nothing else they can do. Yet she just can't let it go. Nobody is saying she shouldn't say anything. We're saying she has done all she can. The front seat is extremely concerning facing any direction. In the backseat, I disagree with the carseat needing to face backwards if the child doesn't fit that way. Regardless, the BIL is the one who had the carseat in the front seat, yet the OP and the inlaws are all going after the SIL. The BIL is the one needing a lecture. I guess it's all about the OP's presentation with comments like "I only feed my child organic baby food."
I quite agree, the delivery of the question/complaint could be an issue. And gossiping about it with the other relatives is not helpful.
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Old 12-27-2011, 08:13 PM
 
2,763 posts, read 4,461,808 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hopes View Post
Zimbo, I think the thing is that the OP and her relatives have spoken up. There's nothing else they can do. Yet she just can't let it go. Nobody is saying she shouldn't say anything. We're saying she has done all she can. The front seat is extremely concerning facing any direction. In the backseat, I disagree with the carseat needing to face backwards if the child doesn't fit that way. Regardless, the BIL is the one who had the carseat in the front seat, yet the OP and the inlaws are all going after the SIL. The BIL is the one needing a lecture. I guess it's all about the OP's presentation with comments like "I only feed my child organic baby food."
The organic babyfood thing was a joke, did you miss the emoticon? Guess its hard to convey sarcasm through text. Sorry you missed that.

For what its worth, the reason we don't talk to the child's father (not a brother in law) is because he doesnt like most of the family. (long backstory family drama that doesnt belong on the forum)

I only met the guy for maybe an hour, so no, i wouldnt talk to him since I dont know him.

The reason we talked to the sister in law was because she posted the said picture on facebook last week. The forward facing carseat issue is something that popped up in a conversation I had with my sister in law today.
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Old 12-29-2011, 03:44 PM
 
Location: Hillsborough
2,825 posts, read 5,974,208 times
Reputation: 2620
Regarding the law vs recommendation, my understanding is that the law says that the child must be properly restrained in a child restrain system. There are no carseats on the market in the US that allow for a child under 1 year or 20 pounds to be forward facing. Therefore, by extension, the law is that the child must be rearfacing until at least the time when they can be properly restrained in an approved forward-facing seat - which is 1 year/20 pounds minimum. Before that, the carseat is not being used properly, which is how it is against the law.

The recommendation though is now at least 2 years RF, or until the child outgrows the convertible seat, which is currently 35, 40, or 45 pounds. A rearfacing seat is outgrown by height when there is less than 1 inch of shell behind the head. It has nothing to do with where the feet touch. My nephew is huge - 22 pounds and not even 6 months old - but there is still no way that he is going to exceed 40 pounds by 1 year.

My kids rearface forever too. My first turned forward at >3.5 years, and my youngest is still RF at >2.5 years. My family knows how I feel about it and why. We've had numerous conversations about it, mostly me defending that choice because they think it's totally oddball. So, I wasn't surprised to see that my neice started forward-facing shortly after her 1st birthday. And I won't be surprised if my nephew on the other side does too. There's nothing for me to say about it. They are well aware of everything I would have to say about it already and have made the choice not to RF past the minimum requirement. There's no point in me bringing it up, so I don't. But it does still make my heart sink a bit every time I see it.
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Old 12-29-2011, 04:07 PM
 
1,067 posts, read 1,382,917 times
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Is it true that the base for car seats arent always neccesary?
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Old 12-29-2011, 04:11 PM
 
Location: here
24,487 posts, read 28,875,378 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by OhioChic View Post
Is it true that the base for car seats arent always neccesary?
read the owners manual. IIRC there is a way to use the seat belt to strap the bucket in w/o the base. It probably depends on the seat.
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Old 12-29-2011, 04:45 PM
 
1,067 posts, read 1,382,917 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rkb0305 View Post
read the owners manual. IIRC there is a way to use the seat belt to strap the bucket in w/o the base. It probably depends on the seat.

Thanks
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Old 12-29-2011, 05:56 PM
 
Location: Whoville....
25,393 posts, read 29,821,951 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by golfgal View Post
Actually, if you talk to any doctor or person in the know, the time to turn them to front facing is not by any real weight or age standard but it is when their feet touch the seat while rear facing. If that child is already 20 lbs at 10 months, it may very well be safer to have him forward facing.
My daughter was turned around on the advice of our pedicatrician at 10 months. She was too long for the car seat. Having her feet locked against the back of the seat during a minor impact could have done permanant damage to her legs/hips. According to our pedicatrician the real concern is does the child have good enough control of their head to face forward. Dd#1 did have, she was too long for the car seat and she was over 20 pounds. The law says one because at one the vast majority of kids have good enough control of their head to face forward. The law had to pick an age. That doesn't mean that some children aren't ready to turn around sooner or that some shouldn't be left rear facing longer. This same doctor kept dd#2 rear facing after she was one. She was shorter and lighter than her sister and lacked her strength.
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Old 12-29-2011, 08:03 PM
 
Location: Colorado
1,706 posts, read 2,937,059 times
Reputation: 1741
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler View Post
My daughter was turned around on the advice of our pedicatrician at 10 months. She was too long for the car seat. Having her feet locked against the back of the seat during a minor impact could have done permanant damage to her legs/hips. According to our pedicatrician the real concern is does the child have good enough control of their head to face forward. Dd#1 did have, she was too long for the car seat and she was over 20 pounds. The law says one because at one the vast majority of kids have good enough control of their head to face forward. The law had to pick an age. That doesn't mean that some children aren't ready to turn around sooner or that some shouldn't be left rear facing longer. This same doctor kept dd#2 rear facing after she was one. She was shorter and lighter than her sister and lacked her strength.
The bolded part is exactly what our pediatrician told us.

Bottom line, you can't control the parents that are ignoring the recommendations. You can talk to them about it but that is about it.

It is no different than a parent that smokes around their child, hits them (but not to the extent where it is abusive) or makes any other parenting choice that you do not agree with.
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Old 12-29-2011, 08:29 PM
 
Location: Hillsborough
2,825 posts, read 5,974,208 times
Reputation: 2620
Quote:
Originally Posted by OhioChic View Post
Is it true that the base for car seats arent always neccesary?
My infant seat did not require the base. We could install it with just a seatbelt, and did so after traveling by plane so we didn't have to bring the base with us.
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Old 12-29-2011, 08:41 PM
 
Location: Hillsborough
2,825 posts, read 5,974,208 times
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Quote:
According to our pedicatrician the real concern is does the child have good enough control of their head to face forward.
Actually, the main concern when turning the child forward facing is whether the vertebrae are fused. The infant's spine is not strong enough to protect the spinal cord if the head is thrown forward in a crash. If the spinal cord is stretched beyond what the spine can hold, you get internal decapitation. The vertebrae are not fused until 3-4 years old. There are pictures of the difference in vertebrae on Vermont's carseat site: Rear Facing Seat - Proper Safety Seat Directions
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