U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 12-28-2011, 10:12 AM
 
604 posts, read 2,515,927 times
Reputation: 380

Advertisements

Thanks everyone. The binkies are in the trash. Logically, I'd never over rule their parents or cause confusion for my granddaughter. I was just worried about having a weak moment. I know she'll get past it. Neither of my children were very interested in pacifiers, so I didn't go through anything like this raising kids. My son had a blankie he loved and my daughter had favorite stuffed animals. We've started letting the girls take their blankies in the crib. Hopefully, it will help.

I'm empowered! Thanks so much!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 12-28-2011, 10:13 AM
 
Location: Charlotte, NC
2,352 posts, read 3,923,844 times
Reputation: 3035
Quote:
Originally Posted by hothulamaui View Post
when the child starts to fuss and cry the op could go into the room and tell the girls a bedtime story to take her mind off it. give the kid a back rub or some kisses. I would imagine like giving up any habit there is a withdrawal period. with cigarettes the urge to smoke lasts a minute or so. just like a labor contraction it has a start a peak and an end. I would suspect that is true with wanting a binkie. distract her grandma till the thought goes away. good luck
I was going to suggest something similar - you don't have to just listen to her cry! You can lie down with her, console her, or hold her. Commiserate. "I know it's hard. You want me to sing a song?" etc.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 10:18 AM
 
1,067 posts, read 1,379,196 times
Reputation: 1070
Quote:
Originally Posted by nana053 View Post
You could have a throwing away the binkie party. Explain that they are so grown up that they don't need them and the *binkie fairy* needs them for the little babies, then do a ceremony and have the girls put them in a box for the *binkie fairy* and take them out after the kids are asleep.

aww thats a cute idea. i'll have to remember that when my time comes to get rid of the binkys.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 10:27 AM
 
14,777 posts, read 34,579,443 times
Reputation: 14280
Already seems solved, so good luck. The binky is soothing, but it also represents a little security. I think letting them have another object for that security is a good idea and seems to be the direction they are going.

As for the folks recommending letting her suck her fingers, while that may be inevitable if she figures it out on her own, that is something I would personally never encourage. It is far easier to get rid of an object like a binky and stop certain behavior while it is extremely difficult to get a kid to stop sucking on their fingers. IMO, if anything looks more ridiculous than a 5 year old with a binky it's a 5 year old sucking on their fingers.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 10:30 AM
 
604 posts, read 2,515,927 times
Reputation: 380
I wanted to add - at barely 2 their language skills are still kind of limited. The "bye bye binkie" stories that might work at 2 1/2 or three are hard for them to understand.

I'm not a bossy or interfering Grandma. Honest. I think my problem is I look at this small fry who's just about to turn two and is a lot more tightly wound than her twin and wonder what it hurts for her to have a binkie at sleep time for a little while longer. I know it's Mom and Dad's call and I totally respect that. We've never butted heads over anything and I've been taking care of these girls since they were 8 weeks old. This is the first thing I've had trouble with. I REALLY didn't want to mess up.

Thank you all again. I sure appreciate your help.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 10:37 AM
 
11,230 posts, read 9,249,360 times
Reputation: 14654
Quote:
Originally Posted by NJGOAT View Post
Already seems solved, so good luck. The binky is soothing, but it also represents a little security. I think letting them have another object for that security is a good idea and seems to be the direction they are going.

As for the folks recommending letting her suck her fingers, while that may be inevitable if she figures it out on her own, that is something I would personally never encourage. It is far easier to get rid of an object like a binky and stop certain behavior while it is extremely difficult to get a kid to stop sucking on their fingers. IMO, if anything looks more ridiculous than a 5 year old with a binky it's a 5 year old sucking on their fingers.
I agree with this. My DD STARTED sucking her thumb when she was about 4 or 5. I did not think anything of it since she had never as a baby, so did nothing to discourage it. She is having a beast of a time stopping now, and she WANTS to.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 10:58 AM
 
32,538 posts, read 29,391,758 times
Reputation: 32243
Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
I agree with this. My DD STARTED sucking her thumb when she was about 4 or 5. I did not think anything of it since she had never as a baby, so did nothing to discourage it. She is having a beast of a time stopping now, and she WANTS to.
Is she changing the position she sleeps in when she sucks her thumb to try and stop? Like moving her hand to her side? A wee suggestion: Have her try and sleep with her hand up to her face in its "normal position" but with her thumb next to the mouth (on her cheek) instead of inside of it.

(Worked for us.)
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 11:35 AM
 
11,230 posts, read 9,249,360 times
Reputation: 14654
Quote:
Originally Posted by DewDropInn View Post
Is she changing the position she sleeps in when she sucks her thumb to try and stop? Like moving her hand to her side? A wee suggestion: Have her try and sleep with her hand up to her face in its "normal position" but with her thumb next to the mouth (on her cheek) instead of inside of it.

(Worked for us.)
Thanks. I will bookmark this. I am hoping the fact that her hand is currently in a cast will break the habit. Make lemonade out of lemons.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 11:38 AM
 
14,777 posts, read 34,579,443 times
Reputation: 14280
Quote:
Originally Posted by jmarkey View Post
I wanted to add - at barely 2 their language skills are still kind of limited. The "bye bye binkie" stories that might work at 2 1/2 or three are hard for them to understand.

I'm not a bossy or interfering Grandma. Honest. I think my problem is I look at this small fry who's just about to turn two and is a lot more tightly wound than her twin and wonder what it hurts for her to have a binkie at sleep time for a little while longer. I know it's Mom and Dad's call and I totally respect that. We've never butted heads over anything and I've been taking care of these girls since they were 8 weeks old. This is the first thing I've had trouble with. I REALLY didn't want to mess up.

Thank you all again. I sure appreciate your help.
In my personal opinion, not on this situation, just the binky in general, I don't see the big deal in letting them use it for sleep. My son was a binky hound until he was a little over 3. He used it primarily to sleep and for comfort, but it was funny because even he knew it wasn't OK to other people and would hide it or put it in his pocket if someone was around. He eventually gave it up on his own. My oldest daughter gave it up around 2 after being absolutely addicted to it. She used to bite holes in them and then didn't like the way they felt. Once they all had holes, she gave it up. The youngest that just turned 2 a couple months ago, just randomly gave it up.

If it was me, I would restrict the use at first to just naps and bedtime and then apply some gentle pressure about how big kids don't use binkies and wait for them to give it up on their own. I think kids who are forced into it often end up as chronic thumb/finger suckers.

Quote:
Originally Posted by somebodynew View Post
I agree with this. My DD STARTED sucking her thumb when she was about 4 or 5. I did not think anything of it since she had never as a baby, so did nothing to discourage it. She is having a beast of a time stopping now, and she WANTS to.
My cousins went through this with their daughter. They were very by the book and had her off a binky before 1. Of course, she ended up sucking on her fingers instead and they waged an endless war over it and it persisted until she was 8. They ended up putting some contraption on her hand that kept her from doing it and then bribing her heavily before it stopped. It is VERY difficult to break them of that habit, so give her all the support and help you can.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-28-2011, 08:39 PM
 
Location: Colorado
1,706 posts, read 2,929,042 times
Reputation: 1741
Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
are they or you showing her the thumb or two fingers to suck? In a pinch that might help. It's a hard time for everybody but nothing is more pathetic than a 3- 5 year old in the stroller with a pacifier. My own son would not take a binkie and I think he would have been a happier infant if he had one. He eventually found his 2 fingers and that worked for quite awhile. Good luck
Quote:
Originally Posted by NJGOAT View Post
As for the folks recommending letting her suck her fingers, while that may be inevitable if she figures it out on her own, that is something I would personally never encourage. It is far easier to get rid of an object like a binky and stop certain behavior while it is extremely difficult to get a kid to stop sucking on their fingers. IMO, if anything looks more ridiculous than a 5 year old with a binky it's a 5 year old sucking on their fingers.
Yep. I'm a teacher and I see students in kindergarten and first grade still sucking their fingers.

We didn't make our daughter give up the pacifier until she was 4. We tried a little bit when she was 2 and again at 3. Some children just have the need to suck until they are older. At four, Katie was ready. She's never sucked her thumb or fingers.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Parenting
Similar Threads
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2018, Advameg, Inc.

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top