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Old 01-03-2012, 11:11 AM
 
11,229 posts, read 9,228,214 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJulia View Post
That is a shame. I'm a china hoarder. I have three sets and three children, but they might not care either. I guess they'll have to bury it all with me.
My MIL browbeat me into registering china when I got married. If she tries to give me hers or anyone else' I am going to scream.
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Old 01-03-2012, 11:12 AM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,907 posts, read 34,973,454 times
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I would like to set up a P.O. Box and all of you can ship all that unloved, unwanted china to me. I will give it a good home, I promise.
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Old 01-03-2012, 11:17 AM
 
5,473 posts, read 8,162,916 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hothulamaui View Post
after the 3rd generation your precious things just become stuff. no one by that time cares if it was great grandpa's or grannies. save the stuff you want and if your kids want it fine. don't count on it. many times we save stuff and the person we want to give it to has either no interest or space to use/store it. memories are in the people not in the stuff

Depends on the family/person.

Personally I think the key is making it just a 'few things' which may mean alot.

Cases and cases of china/things... a bother...

Great Great Uncle's Railroad watch... Cool.

My Great Grandfathers' shotgun and pistol from when he was a cop... I'll never give up

Etc.
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Old 01-03-2012, 11:35 AM
 
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True heirlooms are still wanted and the definition of heirlooms has changed over the years, however what you are experiencing has happened for generations. Many adult kids do not want what their parents had in regards to 'things', no matter what they are.

The ones who typically do are those who enjoyed them as children growing up and have a sentimental value attached to them. Or as they get quite a bit older they realize the value of some items and then have an interest in them.

My collections are just that...mine. I don't expect any of my children to take over my collection.....unless they have a genuine interest in it. Anything else....time will tell whether they hold any interest in what is there. I fully understand that their interests will change as they age too, so we'll see. lol

The one thing that I began for my children is Christmas ornaments, thinking when they moved out they would have a small collection to start them off. My older two had a different thought on the matter. lol Hanging them on the family tree was more important to do as a family deal, than putting them in their apartments where no one else is there to see them. I have no problem with that and if they change their minds at some point they are free to take them to their own homes.
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Old 01-03-2012, 11:48 AM
 
Location: Where we enjoy all four seasons
20,799 posts, read 8,531,328 times
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I feel the same way. I have two children and they can pick whatever they want when I am gone...who knows what triggers a great memory for them. What they don't want they can offer to other family members or sell or do whatever with them.

Hypocore when my daughter was a teen I started a box for her with each year buying a couple ornaments or Christmas decoration that I thought she would like. Each year the collection grew and when she got her first apartment I gave it to her and she treasures each thing today and she is 32. I found no matter where I went I would pick up something special.
As far as my tree it only has meaning to us...and every single year my kids still make sure their things are on the ree. There is nothing of value only things that were made for me since they were little. The value is what it brings to my heart. We have felt bears with eyes in the wrong places some eyes are missing little notes they attached to different things and a lot of"kiss up" decorations they made that I have preserved for each year when we put up the tree including some of the knawed ornaments our dog (who is now gone) got hold of.

My son and his wife have yet to even put up a tree but now they have a son and will probably start their own traditions next year. I have a box of trinkets that will get passed on but all sentimental value..like the loverly earrings they bought for me at Secret Santa workshops and the things that meant a lot to them.

I guess everyone has their reasons but I know when they were younger they could have cared less and now it all represents their childhood. I say wait.
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Old 01-03-2012, 11:54 AM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
84,961 posts, read 98,795,031 times
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I can see both sides of this. I agree with not buying "collectible" type things for the kids, which is how I interpret the OP.

However, I see nothing wrong in saving some things, preferably, IMO, little things. I have some of my great-grandmother's Christmas ornaments that she brought over from Germany, including some candle holders for tree candles. (No, we don't light them, they're just decorations!) I have some other things from my parents' military days, and old photo albums.

Whole sets of china, linens, etc may not be practical to pass on to the next generation. After all, we all wanted our own things when we established our households, did we not?
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Old 01-03-2012, 11:57 AM
 
Location: Chapel Hill, N.C.
36,434 posts, read 41,620,437 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by crazyworld View Post
I feel I say wait.

But what do we do with all this stuff? So many older folks are downsizing and moving into smaller quarters. They don't have room to store stuff. I think very few people spend their entire lives in one or two houses. It is expensive to move and store that stuff.

When I think of how much money was spent, I cringe. Yes I enjoyed much of it for awhile but I don't anymore.

I am beginning to appreciate the minimalist movement. Clutter makes me feel nervous. But most of all I feel bad for my grown kids who will never know how much this stuff is worth and don't have the time to deal with it now or after I die. and yes, now is not a good time to try to sell anything of value. So it now falls to me to take action. Wonder if I would have listened if somebody had warned me many years ago?
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Old 01-03-2012, 12:13 PM
 
Location: Foot of the Rockies
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What you can't sell, you can donate. Most donation centers would love to get nice china, linens, stuff like that. Probably not so much figurines and the like.
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Old 01-03-2012, 12:31 PM
 
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I have gotten the kids a Christmas ornament each year so they will have some. If they don't want them, I am happy to keep them. I know DD will take hers for sure, she talks about it all the time. I have several relatives give me things. If I don't want them, they get donated to Goodwill or something. The ones doing the donating NEED me to take them (and get rid of them for them). I have kept the things I want, like my Grandmother's Currier and Ives red china. It is my holiday china and I loved looking at that in her china hutch when we visited. I have a few other pieces of her's that I loved as a child, none of them are really worth anything though. I use them so the kids have memories of them as well.

I don't collect anything and would never presume anyone else would either so I won't buy "collectibles" for anyone.
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Old 01-03-2012, 12:37 PM
 
Location: Asheville NC
1,388 posts, read 1,162,277 times
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Default After all it is just stuff--

Quote:
Originally Posted by no kudzu View Post
But what do we do with all this stuff? So many older folks are downsizing and moving into smaller quarters. They don't have room to store stuff. I think very few people spend their entire lives in one or two houses. It is expensive to move and store that stuff.

When I think of how much money was spent, I cringe. Yes I enjoyed much of it for awhile but I don't anymore.

I am beginning to appreciate the minimalist movement. Clutter makes me feel nervous. But most of all I feel bad for my grown kids who will never know how much this stuff is worth and don't have the time to deal with it now or after I die. and yes, now is not a good time to try to sell anything of value. So it now falls to me to take action. Wonder if I would have listened if somebody had warned me many years ago?
My advice would be not to buy a collectible in hopes that it will increase in value to be given to your child, put money in a savings program for them instead. Collect what you want, what you have room for, and what brings you Joy.

Several years ago we went through a major remodeling, everything, I mean everything was removed from our house. It gave us an opportunity of going through everything that had been accumulated in 20 plus years. Ridding ourselves of dust collectors, was a prime goal, making the house easy to care for, mainly because of my husbands breathing problems. We cut our books down to a 4th. Anything not used or displayed, was jettisoned. Our son took some things that he wanted, the rest donated, given to family, or sold. We have a few keepsakes from our ancestors, stored in glass cabinets. . We have put most of our photos on CD. You would not belive what a relief it is to have that junk off of our shoulders.

To keep it this way we do have to keep up with keeping it out.

When my husband retires we will move to a less expensive area, but hope to have similar square footage.

Our son had already moved out to a home of his own so most everything that he wanted he had already taken. We do have some Lego's in the attic saved for grandchildren. We recently took his child size table and chair set down for our granddaughter.

Our Daughter in Law is not a china and crystal type of person, if it can't go into the dishwasher she doesn't want it. I respect that. It may change as she ages, but I would not press her to take my china.

I never bought anything as a collectible to give to my son. When we downsized our Christmas ornament collection to one box, he went through the rest and took a few. I think it is important for kids to have their own traditions, including ornaments.

My 88 year old mom is still trying to give me stuff. I tell her that it would go better with one of my brother's houses, that I have no more room. That seems to make sense to her.

Good luck with purging. Don't think of it as wasting money, think of it as gaining space, time, and peace of mind.
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