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Old 01-15-2012, 09:04 PM
 
15,304 posts, read 16,863,154 times
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Of course, kids have always been messed up according to the older generation

The American Family - Author Stephanie Coontz

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As the century comes to an end, many observers fear for the future of America's families. Our divorce rate is the highest in the world, and the percentage of unmarried women is significantly higher than in 1960. Educated women are having fewer babies, while immigrant children flood the schools, demanding to be taught in their native language. Harvard University reports that only 4 percent of its applicants can write a proper sentence. There's an epidemic of sexually transmitted diseases among men. Many streets in urban neighborhoods are littered with cocaine vials. Youths call heroin "happy dust". Even in small towns, people have easy access to addictive drugs, and drug abuse by middle class wives is skyrocketing. Police see 16-year-old killers, 12-year-old prostitutes, and gang members as young as 11. America at the end of the 1990s? No, America at the end of the 1890s.
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Old 01-15-2012, 09:07 PM
 
47,576 posts, read 58,752,909 times
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Originally Posted by elamigo View Post
To me the parents are the ones who say where the lines of respect will be. Many parents want to be their kids friends, others want to be like their kids. Have you seen some moms out there dressed just like their teenage daughters?
A good book I read is entitled "The Death of the Grown Up". To me it is ot the kids fault. It is mostly the parents that allow them to do those things for different reasons which I will not mention them because some will twist what I may write and take offense. Take care.
I think that is the difference. There was a time when parents didn't want to be like teenagers, they wanted to be the adults.

My sister was telling me about one of the mothers she knows - the mother actually gets drunk with her teen daughter and the daughter's friends, she likes to think of herself as fun and cool and young. And she does just like you pointed out -- dresses just like her daughter, tries to act like a sister sharing clothes with her, borrows the daughter's clothes.

Too many parents are afraid to ever say "no" to a child. They won't tell a 2 year old "no", they won't tell a 5 year old "no" and they won't tell a 14 year old "no". They let the child run things the whole time, too afraid to ever discipline or upset the child.
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Old 01-15-2012, 09:23 PM
 
9,018 posts, read 7,957,678 times
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Originally Posted by malamute View Post
I think that is the difference. There was a time when parents didn't want to be like teenagers, they wanted to be the adults.

My sister was telling me about one of the mothers she knows - the mother actually gets drunk with her teen daughter and the daughter's friends, she likes to think of herself as fun and cool and young. And she does just like you pointed out -- dresses just like her daughter, tries to act like a sister sharing clothes with her, borrows the daughter's clothes.

Too many parents are afraid to ever say "no" to a child. They won't tell a 2 year old "no", they won't tell a 5 year old "no" and they won't tell a 14 year old "no". They let the child run things the whole time, too afraid to ever discipline or upset the child.
That is common in the area I'm in. Many of the parents like to allow the kids to drink at their homes, after football games, etc. It is disgusting to me that these idiotic parents sit there trying to regain their youth by drinking with a bunch of kids. Not only the moms, btw....
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Old 01-16-2012, 08:00 AM
 
Location: North America
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The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.
Seems like old Socrates would agree with you :-P. Every generation remembers theirs through rose coloured glasses, and talks about the downfall of values with the newer generations.
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Old 01-16-2012, 08:08 AM
 
2,726 posts, read 4,368,532 times
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Originally Posted by believe007 View Post
So, what led to the demise of the way kids relate to their families? The disrespect I've seen from teens & adult kids to their parents is astounding.
The way that the teens are so self absorbed, spoiled--demanding cell phones, I pods, laptops, "Uggs" & other name brand crap, could be a part of the problem.
And if the parents think the kids will grow up & magically turn into loving, kind people-wrong
Just yesterday I overheard my neighbor yelling, swearing & screaming at his mom to move his stuff, & help him to her car. He's 36 years old
Demanding, yelling, swearing and screaming is not acceptable behavior. That doesn't mean it won't happen. My almost 3 year old does some of these (except swearing) and she is always given the opportunity to say what she needs to say in a different way because we are not listening until then.

Sometimes she tells us "oh, forget it!" but for the most part, she has learned to communicate her needs quite well.
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Old 01-16-2012, 12:15 PM
 
15,762 posts, read 13,195,357 times
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Anyone else find it funny that some people refuse to acknowledge the FACT that kids are not really any "worse" today??
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Old 01-16-2012, 12:36 PM
 
9,056 posts, read 6,731,674 times
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Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
Anyone else find it funny that some people refuse to acknowledge the FACT that kids are not really any "worse" today??
Me. It's a big old pet peeve of mine.

I'd like to add that I don't think parents of today are worse either. Parents have had their issues throughout millennia, too.

Everybody's going to try and do it a bit differently from those before. It's the way of the world.
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Old 01-16-2012, 01:03 PM
 
Location: Philadelphia, PA
3,388 posts, read 3,228,944 times
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Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
Anyone else find it funny that some people refuse to acknowledge the FACT that kids are not really any "worse" today??
Me too.
Get off my lawn!!
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Old 01-16-2012, 01:09 PM
 
Location: El Paso, TX
3,302 posts, read 3,758,539 times
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Originally Posted by malamute View Post
I think that is the difference. There was a time when parents didn't want to be like teenagers, they wanted to be the adults.

My sister was telling me about one of the mothers she knows - the mother actually gets drunk with her teen daughter and the daughter's friends, she likes to think of herself as fun and cool and young. And she does just like you pointed out -- dresses just like her daughter, tries to act like a sister sharing clothes with her, borrows the daughter's clothes.

Too many parents are afraid to ever say "no" to a child. They won't tell a 2 year old "no", they won't tell a 5 year old "no" and they won't tell a 14 year old "no". They let the child run things the whole time, too afraid to ever discipline or upset the child.
Good point. Have you noticed that very often they are asking children what they want as if asking for permission, not so much just to get an opinion? Many of them are basically relinquishing their authority and respect. Take care.
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Old 01-16-2012, 01:23 PM
 
Location: El Paso, TX
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Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
Anyone else find it funny that some people refuse to acknowledge the FACT that kids are not really any "worse" today??
Not worse? Why not them trying to look at crime rates as compared with young ages? That is just one area. Check it out. Even though I did not check that myself, I venture to guess it is much higher today than yesterday. I am not referring to petty things like painting on wall or things like that. Teens have done that for years. I am referring to crime like murder, armed robbery, rape, etc. I was a teen in the 50s and we committed a few bad things. I remember but I know we had a sense of respect that was better than today. For example, there is no way I would approach a kid on the street if he was missbehaving. He would curse me, call dad, and dad probably believe the kid before he would believe me. After that he probably wants to beat me up or call the police on me.
An example of an attitude that is widespread in school was mentione by a teacher taking a college class I was also attending.
She said this 9 year boy did not do much homework or class assignment and failed the tests. At the end of the school year the kids told the teache that he will pass. She, of course, did not pass him. The next day the teacher was called to the principal's office. The mother was demanding her child pass. The principal turned to the teacher asking (implying compliance) if she could pass the child. She said no and the principal said he would be OK so she said he was going to the next grade. What happened next? The boy turned to the teacher and said "See %^&%$ (female dog), I told you I would pass". What did the principal and mother do? Simply that it was not nice to be that way.
Situations like this would not happen much in my generation in the 50s. That is for sure. The mother would have spanked the kid, gone home and than the dad would be next, and who know what else the principal had done also.
I am not saying our generation did not have certain flaws our parents did not agree with. Of course our parents thought we had it better and were worse. I am simply saying that in some areas today's children are in pretty bad shape when it comes to discipline, respect, and ethics as a whole, there are many excptions of great kids also I must say and that is very refreshing to see. Take care.
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